‘Sports Day’

In what could best be described as a valiant bid to relive the rough and tumble of youth, the Club today took a collective call to stage a Sports Day at Borivali National Park on Saturday, December 22, 2012. Only those ‘disciplines’ with a rural and folksy flavor (such as langdi-taang, pitthu, gulli-danda, etc.) would be played and prizes will be given to the winners.
Making the announcement this morning, Srichand Arora (right pic) said that the idea was to reconnect with the games we have lost touch with since childhood and in the process, also have a one-day picnic, which is overdue. In effect, he was responding to the demand of members like Monthi Serrao who have been complaining of “no activity” in the Club since long.
Arora suggested that Arun Patil make a recce of the place in the meantime to check out the options for recreation, lunch and other facilities available and accordingly work out the per-head contribution for the trip. The prizes, however, would be paid for from the Club funds – though it is inevitable, these would be in the nature of token gifts. As a wag put it, the first prize would be a Dettol bottle, second prize a roll of bandages and the third, Band Aid strips.
There would also be a bumper prize for the champion of champions: a big bottle of IODEX!
Harish Wadhwa:
I am sure the Sports Day will be very exciting for one an all. There will be a doctor on call, so don't worry. Bumper prize will be a medicine hamper -- not just one Iodex -- because of multiple and varied injuries (hopefully not)!
Bhaswati Bose:
Not to worry, we will survive. My only suggestion is that after the Sports Day, we should meet for the exercises next year, i.e. on 1st Jan 2013. This will give enough time for the bones, muscles, teeth, etc. to heal properly!
Renu Babani:
Why be so negative and distribute such prizes even in fun? We are stronger than you think!
Harish Wadhwa responds:
Renu-ji, that was in light humour. In fact, we are toying with some new ideas like a kilo of green guavas, assorted packs of chikki, sun-screen lotion, Everyouth face wash and pack, L'oreal five-problem-one solution hair shampoo, Fair & Lovely skin whitening cream, etc. Beauty products should be welcome to one and all!
* Bhaswati-ji, there is a special prize for the "most fit" person who actively participates in all the events and is also present for the exercises the very next morning at the Garden. He/she will be presented with a tetrapack of Amul Milk. By the way, the sports event is scheduled on a Saturday... Hee hee!

Cathartic Release

The therapeutic effects of laughter are well recognized. But there is another aspect about our club that has escaped general attention. With growing familiarity and increased bonding among members over time, the club has become the basis for emotional release to many – even as the ostensible reason for meeting daily is to exercise.
This cathartic melodrama plays out unfailingly before our eyes every morning. However hard anyone might try to enforce ‘discipline’, there can be no stopping the incessant chatter and jokes among members. If someone wants to talk on movies, another would discuss daughter-in-law, a third would pontificate on cooking while a fourth would brood over Sachin Tendulkar… There is no end to the subjects discussed here and with everyone having an opinion on everything under the rising sun, it is not just ‘verbal diarrhea’ (as Geeta Sardhana puts it) but virtually a dam breaking loose, letting out a torrent of bottled-up emotions, feelings and points-of-view.
Without holding a brief for chatterboxes, we can only reflect upon a sad truth that has come to govern our lives – particularly, the ladies. Most are condemned to a lonely, soul killing existence. Many don’t even have their spouses around to talk to. Children are busy with their lives, grandchildren are on their own trip… Moreover, as in all big cities, we have become islands unto ourselves, with hardly any interaction with neighbors. In this situation, the morning visit to the Garden comes as a huge relief. That one hour of mindless banter, leg-pulling and laughter has an incredibly liberating effect – a chance to feel alive and smell the roses.
So today, amid all the lively talk on wearing caps, Himachal tour and train reservations, Kishor and Renu Babani celebrated their return (the day-before) from a Thai holiday with chocolates (lead pic). And we cheered Mrs Harbans Singh (left pic) in absentia with an extra laugh. We had been missing her since yesterday, Guru Nanak Jayanti. Our best wishes go to her today, on her birthday, and for all time.
Harish Wadhwa:
* Wonderfully said and written Blog Monster. I went through the post twice/ thrice, appreciating each word and the lovely emotion in it. Great writing my friend. This is what makes it unique and gives us 1,70,000-plus hits, motivating each member.
* Today is halwe-wali ka janamdin. So, a very Happy Birthday Mrs Harbans Singh! May you be blessed with tons of happiness-roopi halwa and a deluge of ghee-roopi smiles. So when is it next?
* Thanks also to Kishor-da and Renu-ji di jodi for the lovely chocolate. Keep visiting Pattawa more often and getting us more goodies like these. Next time you can think of getting me that fascinating MP3 player we hear in the Garden...(Greeeeeeed!)
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
* What is going on here? Please explain what is happening?
* I may not be around personally, but am with you in spirit!

Gurpurab 2012

Today was Guru Nanak Jayanti – the birth anniversary of the founder of the Sikh religion. By a happy coincidence (and more appropriately) it also happened to be World Compassion Day – a day marked to celebrate universal brotherhood, fellow feeling, voluntary service (seva), love and forgiveness.
More than 500 years ago, Guru Nanak Dev had preached the very same values, but in different words: “Nirda▫i▫ā nahī jot ujālā” (You have no compassion, the Lord's light does not shine in you). On this auspicious day, let us invoke his teachings and rededicate ourselves to those noble thoughts. As they say, “Guru Nanak Dev-ji de prakash utsav di lakh lakh vadhayee sabhaanu!”
The prabhat pheri around Lokhandwala started out late this year and had taken a new route – thereby depriving many of us the opportunity to join the procession. Srichand Arora was quite disappointed as he has developed a sore heel and unlike previous years, could not travel the distance to catch up with the procession. Kishor Babani though, was lucky. He arrived from Bangkok last night and the first thing he and his wife did this morning was to seek the blessings of Wahe Guru at the prabhat pheri. Only thereafter did he show up at the Garden.
Ramila Mistry very graciously distributed roasted almonds (left pic) as prasad – a welcome treat on an auspicious occasion. And the other big news of the morning: Shekhawat has booked 20 tickets to Amritsar by Golden Temple Mail for the Himachal Tour next March-April. How he could mobilise so many people in less than a week is nothing short of a miracle. Of course, there’s Arora also – the silent presence operating tirelessly in the background. Hats off to these two remarkable gentlemen!
Harish Wadhwa:
Twanu sab-nu vee Guru Nanak Dev-ji de Prakash Utsav di lakh lakh vadhayeeyan. Rab twada bhala kare te jholi vich khushiyan bhar deve.

One-Point Programme

As the date closes in on bookings for the ‘Himachal Tour’, all activities of the Club have ceased to matter. Or so it would appear from Hari Singh Shekhawat’s behavior these days (lead pic). Mobilising people to join the tour has become a one-point programme for him. As his wife, Mohan Kanwar (below right) once wittily remarked: “Sotey-jagtey, uthtey-baithtey, he has only one thought in mind!” So absorbed is the man on organizing this tour.
Only two days are left to firm up on the railway reservations and in his anxiety to ensure that the group travels together, Shekhawat must necessarily book all tickets en-bloc. Srichand Arora is of course, with him and apart from liaising with the tour operator in Pathankot, has issued circulars and put up notices in the Garden for all interested to sign up soon. Yesterday, he even managed to get an ambivalent Yusuf Rassiwala to come around; but this morning, the latter did not show up.
Shekhawat too is having his share of flip-flops. While trying to push up the numbers, he pulled a fast one on Sunita Jajodia, informing that her tickets were already booked with Santosh Tyagi’s. But when he played the same trick with Ramila Mistry, it backfired. He had told her that Monthi Serrao needed company on the trip. Monthi had only to turn up and gleefully deny everything!
Clearly, where things are going wrong is that everyone is putting up a set of pre-conditions before signing up. If one wants to add a new destination in the itinerary, another wants to drop some. Likewise, while some find the ten-day programme too hectic, others want it reduced to no more than a week. The worst and most common argument runs somewhat like this: “If A or B goes, I will not go. But if C goes, I might consider…” Since it is not possible to please everyone in a large group, Shekhawat finds himself caught between a rock and a hard place.
Hearing this, Harish Wadhwa too came up with a pre-condition: “If Priyanka Chopra (left) goes, I will go.” Quick on the uptake, Arora hit back, “Huh! If Priyanka Chopra goes, why should I be asking you?” Harish thought for a while and retorted: “If Priyanka Chopra goes, let no one go from the Club. I shall go!”
Said in jest, it just betrays a childish innocence on the part of Harish and Arora. Neither of them has any idea of what happens when beauty is paired with the beast.
Harish Wadhwa:
Only good things can happen (when beauty meets so-called beast). That great adrenalin rush, heart pumping extra oxygen-rich blood, glistening bright eyes and the willingness to go many extra miles... all for such a good company! Ek baar maine commitment kar di, toh mein Club ya gharwalon ki bhi nahin sunta. Moreover, it will be an all-paid tour for her and me by air!
Big Laaf responds:
Done, Harish -- it's all-paid. Now keep up to your "commitment". Yesss... you can do it!!!
Harish Wadhwa retorts:
Yes we can! I am talking to the pic almost continuously, not only because I am mesmerised by PC's looks, but also because I wish and dream to make the trip with her. After all, only dreams come true... So let's start dreaming.

“Shut Up!”

Khatoon Baig (left) was at her irritable best. A mild-mannered person, she is not easily given to provocation, let alone an emotional outburst. But today she was rather late and had come hurrying in… only to find just half-a-dozen people around – all males. No other woman had turned up till then.
Sensing her discomfiture, Yusuf Rassiwala (right) suggested she rest for a while on the bench till another female showed up. But Khatoon had already joined the exercises and was getting increasingly irritated at being repeatedly singled out by Yusuf. “They are my saathis,” she explained, pointing at the men around. “I am fine with them.”
But Yusuf was extra patronising. “No, you can take it easy," he persisted. "Let another lady come in and then you may join the exercises.”
Suddenly, Khatoon lost her temper. “Shut up!” she exploded, wagging her finger.
Silence descended. Nobody had ever seen the lady flare up like this. Yusuf was also silent as he continued with the exercises till one by one, other ladies came in and normalcy was restored. By then, Khatoon had also loosened up and tried to engage Yusuf in small talk. But Yusuf had not forgotten, nor forgiven. “Aap ne mujhe ‘Shut up’ bola,” he rubbed it in.
Trouble was, apart from Khatoon, there was no one Yusuf could take liberties with today. Shekhawat had gone to Colaba for his medical test and the other punching bag, Srichand Arora was off-colour as a relative had passed away and he too was to leave, for Chembur. That made Khatoon a convenient target for leg-pulling.
On a happier note, here’s a snapshot (above) of Renu and Kishor Babani holidaying in Thailand. They got us worried after reports of political rallies in Bangkok have been pouring in since Friday. But from this picture, they both appear to be having a ball at Patayya... oops Patawwa!
Harish Wadhwa:
* Hathon-mein-hath wala pic, haan... Kya baat hai! Kishor-da and Renu-ji, have a good time. But I wish you took an authentic pic with tourists on Patawwa beach...

Day 836

Pic of the Week

And the Oscar for special-effects goes to...

Congratulations Arun-bhai! Your first Oscar... Ab Toh Muskurao! --Bhaswati Bose

We are proud to have an Oscar winner in the Big Laaf Club -- who is also a member of our Badmaash Company. --Srichand Arora

Janch rahe ho Arun-bhai!
This is not a Sunday pic but precognition of a real-day event. Don't be surprised to see this turning into reality and Arun-bhai being felicitated with an Oscar. May this intuitive dream come true soon. --Harish Wadhwa

Cap Rule

Since the time Srichand Arora brought in the ‘compulsory cap rule’, many are suffering daytime nightmares every morning. The very sight of the man now sends them into a mad scramble to fish out their caps from strange recesses. Those turning up late without caps are refused entry into the exercise circle – some even volunteering to do sit-ups to buy peace (see post of November 21). Others are known to meekly turn back from the Gate, lest they be hauled up.
Much as this has become a source of great amusement to all, it has to be said that we are witnessing near-100 per cent compliance on the caps these days. Still, there are a few like Prakash Motwani (right pic) today who could get away by pleading that he did not know he had to wear his cap on his head!
If that was not funny, Kiran Sajjan (lead pic, in red) took the cake – and ate it too. Having been ticked off twice in the recent past, she came in this morning, brandishing her cap as though it were a banner of victory. “Lai hoon, lai hoon yeh…” she announced pointing to the cap, before putting it on. Then mumbling to no one in particular, she launched off into a soliloquy: “Yeh cap zaroori hai,” “Yeh nahin hone se exercise nahin hota,” “Apni exercise ho na ho, iski exercise zaroori hai…” Twice the cap dropped from her head. “Rule is rule,” she announced in English. Yusuf Rassiwala, Ramila Mistry and others standing close by just could not hold themselves as they doubled up in laughter. But Kiran, in all innocence, continued talking to herself.
We were barely done with the exercises when Arora got the scare of his life as a young man (left pic) suddenly rushed towards him and knelt down, pleading with folded hands: “Babuji, mujhe maaf kar doh!” This was the same struggling actor, a movie hopeful who was seen lurking around minutes earlier with a plastic pistol in hand. The next moment, he had Sunita Jajodia also jumping out of her skin. He made a dash towards her and with great flourish enacted Anil Kapoor’s dying scene from the movie, Beta: “Maa… Tu ne apne bete ko zahar diya?!!” Sunita was not at all amused.
Renu Babani (from Pattaya):
We just reached Pattaya and have wi-fi in the room. All's well and having a blast. Missing you guys for sure and our daily banter and gossip. Shall be in touch. Take care and GO for your tea... but you will not enjoy without me. I grant thee permission!
Harish Wadhwa:
* Eh Arora Baba! Mujhe bhi ek cap de do, jisko pehen kar mein aap ke club ka manoranjan kar sakoon!!!
* Renu-ji, Kishor-da can you post some nice real pics of 'Pattawa' beach for the benefit of all who dream of being there?

Conjoined Females

There was a time when Pratap Bhatt used to enter the Garden and we knew for certain that Prakash Motwani would not be far behind. These days, we see Razia Khan and Nafisa Sayyad similarly conjoined. Likewise, when Sunita Jajodia is seen, we are sure Santosh Tyagi has to be somewhere around. In fact, the latter has become an emotional magnet for Ramila Mistry as well. Ditto for Nahid Khan and Lakshmi. And Geeta Sardhana, Mrs Harbans Singh and Monthy Serrao…
The friendly coexistence within these groupings gets amplified when someone goes out of town, thereby leaving the other(s) at a loose end. Attendance suffers. This is exactly what has happened following the mass exodus (see yesterday’s post), particularly among the ladies. Today, attendance was in single digit with just three men around to start the exercises. This only goes to prove the strength of the groupings, whereby, the exercises are rendered incidental.
Nevertheless, our red T-shirt Manwani (in pic) dropped by to add to the numbers and as usual, raise a laugh. He almost succeeded when he informed that the marriage ceremony of a tulsi plant (sacred basil) is being conducted in a neighboring housing complex tomorrow. We were all invited to join the baraatis for this Tulsi Vivaah!

Winter Deserters

As the temperature dips, attendance at the exercises drops. This also happens to be the wedding season. With several members rushing out of town, the Garden has begun to look barren (pic alongside). This morning we were left with barely a dozen to hold fort. The rest appear to have deserted us.
It all began with Geeta Sardhana taking off for Vrindaban early this week. Almost immediately, Razia Khan headed out to Calcutta. Then Mrs Harbans Singh left, soon to be followed by Santosh Tyagi. Thereafter, it was the turn of the Babanis – Renu and Kishor. Harish Wadhwa left for Delhi. And now, by the week-end, Jagmohan Papneja and Nahid Khan would have also gone to Delhi.
Meanwhile, Shekhawat has come in for high praise for pulling off the impossible once again. Within a day of announcing the dates for the March 2013 trip (yesterday’s post), he has enlisted 18 members, 12 of whom have already paid the advance of Rs8,000 each. Even he is surprised at this response. Srichand Arora is now worried about a problem of plenty and has advised Shekhawat to be selective about those he decides to take on board.
There was also some talk of an outing to Borivli National Park in early December where we would stage what could perhaps be our annual Sports Day. Kho-kho, pakdan-pakdai, tug-of-war (this came from Hari Naraiyani), stapu, pitthu and all those childhood games we are out-of-touch with, will be played during the day in the wilds. For Monthi Serrao (left), who has been clamouring for "some activity" in the Club, this must come as music to her ears -- just that we could be surrounded by hungry leopards and cross-eyed gorillas as spectators.

New Mission

The Diwali Party now behind us, Shekhawat is already into his next mission – the March 2013 trip. This morning he distributed copies (left pic) of the tour programme, as finalised in consultation with Srichand Arora:
March 29: Arrival AMRITSAR
March 30: AMRITSAR to KATRA
March 31: KATRA
April 1: CHANDIGARH
April 2: CHANDIGARH to SHIMLA
April 3: SHIMLA
April 4: SHIMLA to DELHI
April 5: Departure for MUMBAI
Hotel accommodation has been arranged (in deluxe rooms on a twin-sharing basis) at the seven points of halt and the total cost of the excursion, inclusive of breakfast and road travel, is estimated at Rs12,000 per head. Travel from Mumbai and return has been left open to individuals, though Shekhawat would prefer everyone travels together in a group by train.
Jagmohan Papneja (right) was the first to make a booking by paying a token advance for his wife and himself. Both Arora and Shekhawat are already committed with their spouses. Ved Prakash Grover and Santosh Tyagi have also expressed their desire to join the trip. The others would have to make up their minds within a week before Shekhawat gets moving with the railway reservations. Time is running out.
On a lighter note, members had set a record today, all of them turning up in their club caps. In a way, this was ‘mission accomplished’ for Arora who, for the past week or so, has been aggressively goading, coaxing and requesting everyone to wear their caps in the Garden. So when Harish Wadhwa showed up ‘capless’ towards the end of the exercises, he was not allowed to join the group. Much to the vicarious delight of all, he was made to stand outside the circle (see that solitary white figure at the far end in the pic alongside) as punishment.
But Harish was not alone. Soon Kiran Sajjan came in without her cap and was meted out the same treatment. She also took it sportingly, till Harish, in a wonderful display of male chivalry, led her by the hand into the circle. The gesture was much appreciated by all.

Party Blues

The effect of overeating yesterday (see post) was visible today. Most of the members chose to sleep it off and did not turn up for the exercises. Those who did, confessed to skipping dinner last night. Almost everyone had a story to narrate of irregular bowel movement, indigestion, acidity, constipation… you name it, they had it and yet, there was no denying that it was “great food” and “we all enjoyed”. Only those who did not attend the Diwali Lunch looked healthy this morning.
Soon after the exercises, Shekhawat got into number crunching and settling the accounts (top pic) on the expenses incurred for the party. He had to refund the excess amount collected from all members and as is his wont, had the figures ready for all to inspect. The best part was that those who could not attend yesterday’s party were not charged at all (but for the contribution in their capacity as hosts). This had been a contentious issue over the past two days, leading to a sharp division of opinion among members – but fortunately, it has been resolved in all fairness.
In the end, we have all realized that organising a restaurant/hotel party with joint contribution is tricky business. It is hard to please everyone all the time. However enjoyable it might be, the misunderstanding it creates is not worth the effort. So, by common consensus, it has been decided never again to have such a party from the Club. Yesterday’s was the last.
Harish Wadhwa:
Who says there will be no party now? We have it every day at the Badmaash Chai Company (BCC). Three prominent members seem to be having a good time on the newly acquired manji there! Party is a 'mood' and not the place to lunch or dine.
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
* "Money in his hand... Do I get a share too?"
* "I just got up. Where's that chai wallah? I need a boost!"
[P.S.: Bhasu, do come tomorrow as it is my last day at the Garden... perhaps the 'last tea' before we meet again?]

Diwali Lunch 2012

People are prone to hiccups, usually after a hearty meal. But we have been having multiple hiccups long before… from the time news broke of Bal Thackeray’s indisposition. The Diwali Party scheduled for November 16 was put off (see post) as a result. And then, the man passed away on November 17, bringing the whole of Mumbai to a grinding halt. Even this morning, there was no certainty that the restaurant, Northern Indian Tadka would be open for the day.

In this all-consuming suspense and confusion, many chose not to show up for the lunch. They included Yusuf Rassiwala, Nahid Khan, Razia Khan, Nafisa Sayed, though of course, some have been observing Moharram since the 17th. Others like Srichand Arora and Harish Wadhwa had to excuse themselves because of prior commitments. Barely 36 people turned up at the restaurant and from the looks of it, everyone had an enjoyable afternoon together.If there was anything to complain about, it was the unending stream of starters served – starting from soups and salads to chops and cutlets and mutton kebabs, pani-puri, chicken roast, mugs of beer… By the time we were into the main course, there was no appetite left. Many did not have the capacity to even move to the buffet counter. They demanded to be served on the table. And then they gorged on rotis and dal, rice, paneer, chicken and fish curries rounded off with halwa, chum-chums, malai-kulfi and ice-cream like there was no tomorrow!
It was the lunch of all lunches, meant essentially for those with a large heart and a bottomless pit for a stomach. That included all of us – without exception. The pictures speak for themselves.

Harish Wadhwa:
* The pics make me jealous because I couldn’t make it. Everyone seems to be enjoying the sumptuous food. Go ahead folks... I'm glad you had a great time.
* I hope the Garden has fresh air to breathe tomorrow, but for the foul smell of the flooding nullah nearby, as an after effect...(LOL)
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
Food, food and more food. So many choices, if only the stomach was willing.
Harish Wadhwa adds:
* Renu-ji, the stomach and taste buds must still be willing for more, but good sense (mind it!)prevailed and everyone stopped after eight(???) rounds.
* Why did no one steal some food in their pockets and/or sari ka pallu for hungry people like I who could not make it? Very bad!!!

Day 829

Pic of the Week

He's the original 'KING OF GOOD TIMES'!

"Ek ke saath ek free. Sone pe suhaga. Meri toh nikal pari. Balle Balle!" --Kishor Babani

"Main hoon James Bond! Yeh meri angrez beauties. Kya naseeb hai!" --Renu Babani

"KISSSSSS... Kiss ko pyar karoon?
Kaise pyar karoon / Yeh bhi hai, woh bhi hai..." --Bhaswati Bose

"Munda bigadh gaya!" --Sunita Jajodia (in the Garden)

"Kabhi to hamare bhi aise din aayenge,
Jab dost yaar hum se bhi aise hi jalenge!"
Envy you Kishor-da. I wish I was in your place and you were watching me with the baatli you are holding. (Kishor-da is wishing/ dreaming that the duo are just about two inches closer to him, so as not to miss his million dollar smile...!)--Harish Wadhwa

Scaredy Cats

The morning began like any other, except that Srichand Arora (bottom, left) was nowhere to be seen. Yesterday also, he had not come. Word went around that he was tied up with an ailing relative and probably, could not take time out for the exercises after all the running about during the day.
And then, he was sighted!
Bapu Rane was the first to sound the alarm and instantly all eyes turned to the gate. There was Arora, jauntily making his way into the Garden. Everybody froze. Even Nahid Khan stood transfixed with her mouth open, momentarily forgetting that she had suspended the exercises. The reactions were electric and hilarious at the same time; it had to be seen to be believed.
For the first few seconds, Santosh Tyagi just could not imagine that it was indeed Arora who was fast heading in her direction. In total confusion, she forgot the exercises, threw up her hands, did a quick turnaround and rushed to a bench to retrieve her cap. Before she could put it on, Renu Babani and Sunita Jajodia were up on their feet, craning their necks like lemurs on the alert. Quickly they scampered to their places. Till then, they were comfortably relaxed on the bench, chatting merrily while the exercises were on. But the best was from Jagmohan Papneja, who too had abandoned the exercises and gone away on a stroll. Suddenly he materialized out of nowhere and took his position in the circle before Arora could join in!
Arora had brought along printouts of the programme for the March 2013 trip, as finalized with a tour operator. But before Shekhawat could take it up, Santosh began her jokes narration (lead pic), soon to be followed by Kishor Babani. And then there were the demands and counter-demands for the Diwali party which spilled over into the tea session outside the Garden (pic above). As of now, it has been decided to have the party on Monday, November 19, 2012.
Harish Wadhwa:
* Chai mood wasn't as bad as it is showing in the pic. But yes, men are distancing themselves from the women... after one lady member declared that Eve was beautiful but a dumbo to have fallen for Adam. Our hearts are hurt and need to be assuaged by retraction of the statement, preferably over a nice cup of tea at her home.
* Arora-sa'ab, we will pray that the clouds of despair over your near and dear would move away and that they will all be fine very soon. We could see the pain and concern in your face today -- as is visible in the photograph as well.
Renu Babani:
* "Listen to my jokes today. It will make your day!"
* "Do I look so scary to you? I'm not that strict."
* "Let me see what is in the papers today... if I can comprehend!"

Party Postponed

The Diwali party scheduled for this afternoon has been put off indefinitely. A frantic phone call late last night from Northern Indian Tadka put paid to our plans of reciprocating last month’s Eid lunch with an expansive buffet spread today. Apparently some local Shiv Sena goons had threatened to vandalise the restaurant if it were to be kept open.
Making this announcement, Hari Singh Shekhawat (right pic) said that a new date for the Diwali lunch will have to be fixed, but only after normalcy returns to Mumbai. The city is in grips of a fear psychosis (yesterday’s post) following conflicting rumours on the ailing Sena supremo Bal Thackeray. Although media reports describe his condition as ‘critical but stable’, in the absence of a customary medical bulletin from attending doctors (if there is any), the worst is being feared.
Given this uncertainty, we find ourselves in a piquant situation. We cannot afford to push our party too far into the future because from next week, the Club will witness a massive exodus of sorts. Santosh Tyagi, Renu and Kishor Babani, Nahid Khan, Harish Wadhwa, Mrs Harbans Singh etc. are all going out of town. Surely they cannot be excluded from the party. Even if a date, as early as November 19 (Monday) were to be fixed (as Shekhawat suggested) we would be excluding Razia Khan (right pic) as her tickets for Calcutta are booked for Sunday. And that would be a pity. For, she is the one to have initiated and organized the Eid party for us last month.
While various options were being debated, Shekhawat broke the news of Sunita Jajodia (left pic) buying a car, thereby triggering an extra laugh after the exercises. Blushing from ear to ear, she accepted our compliments with grace. Well, congratulations once again and Hip-Hip… Hurray!
Harish Wadhwa:
* Why is Razia-ji looking so tense in the pic? I saw her sitting on the bench with Nafisa-ji today, but not in her usual cheerful mood. Hum sabse bichhadne ka gam itna zyada kyon? Well, you are going to be out to Kolkata for just a few days. Party-sharty will happen with you around!
* Congrats for the new gaddi, Sunita-ji. When are we getting a joy ride?
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
* "Sorry, but there's nothing I can do!"
* "Why do I have to be alone when there are so many people around?"
* "See I come to the Garden. Stop complaining."

Ominous Calm

Cool and pleasant morning… but for an unusual stillness in the air indicative of an undercurrent of tension. Shops across the street had their shutters down. News came in of heavy police presence on the Western Express Highway leading to Lilavati Hospital. Cars were damaged in stray stone-pelting incidents. Shiv Sainiks were on the rampage…
Is Bal Thackeray no more?
Jagmohan Papneja stopped to check if the rumours were true. Srichand Arora made some quick phone calls. Santosh Tyagi mentioned that there was nothing untoward reported in the 5:30 news bulletin on TV. Renu Babani checked her BlackBerry. “Thackeray’s condition critical…” was all it said.
Against this shadow of uncertainty, the exercises were conducted in silence. Nobody could be sure what lay in store during the day. But Arora (in pic) managed to create a minor, but welcome diversion by presenting an update on the March 2013 trip. He informed that a tour operator was offering a package deal that covered Amritsar-Jammu-Shimla-Manali-Delhi over eight days -- all for Rs12,000 per head. It is now for Shekhawat to take this forward.
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
Rain or shine, the show must go on!
Harish Wadhwa:
Maybe it was that calm which forced us to have two rounds of tea and get back in mood. And life carried on as usual for the day.

New Year

Nobody was supposed to come to the Garden today. Even Lord Rama had taken rest after the celebrations on Diwali night. But obviously, we are a patch over the rest. After the revelry and excesses of last night, not only did we have a full house (see pic) this morning, many came in early, well before their normal time. Even Mrs Kiran Arora was present today and participated in the exercises.
There was a reason for this. Today happened to be Samvat 2069, the beginning of a new year by the Vikram Samvat calendar. It is an auspicious day, especially for the mercantile community who follow the lunar calendar based on the ancient Hindu tradition of Vedic timekeeping. Getting up late or lazing about early morning does not bode well for the rest of the year. Such is the belief.
On our part, let us wish all our members, readers and followers a very happy, peaceful and prosperous new year. Keep laafing!
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
The usual greetings on the special day and discussions on the previous...
Harish Wadhwa:
Decent turnout despite most having kept awake till late last night. I am not too sure if it was for health reasons or just feeling refreshed. Happy New Year on Vikram Samvat 2069 to all folks.

Dream Come True

At long last, Harish Wadhwa’s wishes were answered this morning. True to her promise (see his comments yesterday), Mrs Harbans Singh brought kada prasad, the most divine halwa preparation anybody can imagine. Such has been Harish’s undisguised, if not shameless persistence (not to mention, impatience) over the past few weeks that she had to advance her birthday (November 29) celebration with this delectable treat. And what could be any better than combining it with the Diwali celebrations?
For the rest of us (actually, beneficiaries by default) this shall stand out as the event of the year. For, nobody makes halwa the way Mrs Singh does – just the correct sweetness, texture, the right consistency of wheat, ghee, almonds and resin and above all, served at perfect temperature. Mrs Singh had brought her daughter along to assist her and surely, nobody was surprised when the two huge casseroles they had come with were wiped clean within minutes.
Nobody kept track of how many helpings who had – such was the magic of that halwa. Too much of a good thing GONE too soon!
The sad part was that we will now have to wait a full year and count on Harish’s brazenness for the next round of kada prasad from Mrs Singh. (Incidentally, he has already been targeting Santosh Tyagi for her equally sublime kanji!) Monthi Serrao appropriately acknowledged Harish’s role in playing proxy to the collective aspirations of the Club: “His mehnat has not gone waste!”
We must also acknowledge the role of Razia Khan (top left) and Banoo Khan (bottom left) at celebrating the Diwali spirit today. They had come with chocolates and candies for all members, whereas not a single Hindu among us had thought it necessary to do the same on what is supposed to be the biggest Hindu festival. Small gestures like this speak volumes. Thank you Razia and Banoo! And wishing you all a HAPPY AND SAFE DIWALI.
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
Sweets... and more sweets, in keeping with the Diwali spirit!
Anonymous:
Данный пост — одно из немногих исключений, когда читаешь с удовольствием и что-то для себя выносишь. Спасибо автору. Добавлю в избранное.
[Translation: This is a post - one of the few exceptions, that you read with pleasure and have something to take out. Thanks to the author. Added to my favorites.]
Harish Wadhwa:
'Tum yuheen saath dene ka, vaada karo,
Mein yuheen mast halwe, khata rahoon...'
Thank you, Mrs Harbans Singh for the truly divine halwa, the best kada prasad in town. Now my friends in the Club would have realised as to why I was so insistent and persistent of her to make some. That lovely aroma of roasted wheat, solid treat to the eyes, dripping ghee, generously garnished with dry fruits and your love for us, left a long-tingling taste on our tongue and a permanent impression on our hearts. Thanks a ton.
Jasleen Kaur B:
I never knew, mom's halwa is in so much demand! Although, agree, that she makes the best in the world. And thank you all, for such a warm feeling. It feels very good to be with you all.
Harish Wadhwa adds:
You just said it Jasleen-ji, it's mom's halwa that makes it so special. Yes, it was wonderful.

Diwali Prelude

There are ways and ways to celebrate Diwali – by bursting firecrackers, distributing sweets, lighting oil lamps, buying gold, gambling with cards… But we had our own unusual way of getting into the swing of things, thanks entirely to Monthi Serrao who had brought her four-year-old grandson, Tian to the Garden this morning.
Needless to say, the tiny tot took to us like fish takes to water. For a while he scampered around before taking his place on the sidelines to observe us quietly. He then stepped in the middle as though to conduct the exercises, laughed when we laughed, gamely matched Srichand Arora growl-for-growl (top pic) in the Lion and Lioness round and generally, enjoined us in the spirit of joy and merriment that the Diwali festival holds.
Soon after the exercises when someone made a presentation to the Club, Tian stood his ground amid the grown-ups (bottom pic), paper in hand and listened patiently. Once that was done with, he was all over the place, shooting his green plastic pistol and running about the Garden with Harish Wadhwa for company. Between the two, it was hard to separate the child from the man.
Clearly, over the past couple of years or so (since the time he had first dropped in as a cry-baby, barely able to talk) Tian has matured fast, gaining both in confidence and social skills. He is quick to size-up strangers, chooses his words with care, knows exactly when and how to rebut and yet, behaves his age. As Hari Narayani once put it, he is the Club’s best bet for the future.
Harish Wadhwa:
* Arora sa'ab, bacche ko darane ka nahin, galey se lagane ka!
* Tomorrow is a great day of a "wish" coming true... besides being the most important festival of the year. You can already smell it in the air, don't you? It's a surprise!
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
* "I maybe small, but don't underestimate my ROARRR!"
* "All of you listen to me please, I have the paper in hand..."

Day 822

Pic of the Week

Our dear friend – a much-loved, much-respected, but painfully shy man… has gone missing. Any clue where he can be found?

THE MYSTERIOUS DISAPPEARANCE: Kahan gayab ho gaya... But looks to me like the dog is lost! --Renu Babani

"Aap Chhipe hai Kahan / Hum Tadapte hain Yahan... (chai ke liye!)"
Missing our Badmaash Company regular, Jain-sa'ab. These days posting a Missing Person-ad is in vogue, like Gauri Bhosle of the tele-serial which is likely to go on air soon. -- Harish Wadhwa

Gangnam Ishtyle

Here’s breaking news: Long before a South Korean rapper went 'oop' 'oop' and became an international sensation with what has now come to be known as Oppan Gangnam Style, the very same dance was being performed at Lokhandwala Garden No 4, Mumbai every morning for years. Little known to many, Hari Singh Shekhawat is the originator of this dance form that involves cheesy animal-inspired moves and intricate leg-shuffling side gallops.
This morning, the 73-year-old naval veteran performed the Gangnam dance (pic alongside), much to the delight of all present. As usual, he started by yelling “Rane” and galloped in the air, arms raised, alternatively breaking into a horse trot and same leg-shuffling side gallops as the Korean pop star. The only difference was that instead of music, he kept beat with loud outbursts of “Ha-Ha”, “Ha-Ha-Ha”!
For us at the Club, this is of course, old hat. We have been watching Shekhawat do this for ages without bothering to give the dance a name. At one time, his solo performance had become a daily ritual marking the end of the exercises and signalling the start of the morning prayers. The only person who could match steps with him on this is Bapu Rane and together, they have often produced some exhilarating duets – pucca Gangnam ishtyle.
The other major highlight of the morning was Jagmohan Papneja ushering in the Diwali celebrations with a box of barfis (bottom pic). The festivities actually begin next week, but many are likely to be out of town or otherwise, would stop visiting the Garden for the exercises. It was extremely nice and thoughtful of Papneja to bring in the festive cheer in advance and wish everyone well on the occasion.
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
* "I'm a horse, galloping to freedom."
* "Who doesn't have a sweet tooth? Treats always welcome!"
Harish Wadhwa:
Shekahwat-ji gallops in this Gangnam ishtyle to meet and greet Rane-ji, his ek-din-ka-bichhda-hua brother. It is nice to watch the duo do it in sync as they rejoice their meeting.

Never Enough

The surest measure for joy, they say, is when you are unaware of time ticking by. For us at the Garden, whatever time we spend together, is never enough. We are supposed to be there at 7:00 in the morning, but many of us are already on the benches by 6:30. The exercises last an hour (and that is serious business), give or take 10 minutes. Thereafter, it is gaffing time. Some hang around while others head to a nearby tea stall. Many continue their discussion on the road (lead pic), often in the midst of heavy traffic. The discussions would be unending – just that no one ever remembers what was talked about. And yet, a lot still remains to be said the next day.
This happens to almost everyone. The same people who used to return home by 8:30 are now going back at 9:30 (on a good day), a clear three hours since they had left. But ask them what could have delayed them for so long and they would be at a loss for words!
Just to get a sense of what engages so many brilliant minds for so long, here are some clues: A’s grand-daughter is getting married and only B is invited, why not the others; C’s cap was stolen and she is asked to catch the thief before she gets a new one; D has acquired a smartphone, but cannot operate it (big deal); E wants to ensure non-vegans abstain from eating veggies for Diwali lunch; F wants to break G’s bones big time for being shifted around during the exercises; H, I, J, K, L… cannot understand why X or Y wears his clothes ulta!
Well, that was today. Tomorrow is another day.
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
* "OMG! This is so funny, you guys are missing out..."
* "I have so much to say, but such little time. So listen up quick!"
Harish Wadhwa:
* By the way, what is Santosh-ji crooning about? Just curious. Is she saying, "Wait for a couple of weeks for red gaajar to come into the market before I get some good kanji for all of you"?
* In the lead-pic Kishor-da seems to have understood what the ladies talk about!

Gag Order?

The gag order was today observed in the breach.
In what was a typical case of the ‘cat being away and the mice having a ball’, the morning witnessed a highly charged, noisy bunch of under-age adults eager to shoot their mouths in all directions. As Geeta Sardhana (right pic) was to say: “What to do? After bottling ourselves all day at home, we get verbal diarrhoea coming here. We can’t help it!”
Ramila Mistry (left pic), who had bravely stepped into Srichand Arora’s shoes, tried to do some damage control – even threatening to chuck the chatterboxes OUT – only to invite mischievous jibes from Dilip Babani & Co (bottom pic) who were bent upon addressing her as “Kokilaben” (as in ‘THE hospital’). She momentarily silenced them by declaring that Kokilaben happens to be her aunt – thereby, also raising her stock in the eyes of all members. But within seconds, they were back to their pranks. Before long, Nahid Khan was heard making feeble attempts at restoring order in chaste English: “Be quiet please or go out.”
But nobody was listening. Shekhawat was as usual, playing to the gallery while Nafisa Sayyed was more intent on mimicking his Hindi, particularly the way he pronounced numbers while counting. Even Harbans Singh got into the flow of things and joined the talkative trio of Geeta Sardhana, Bhaswati Bose and Kajal Babani. By the time Monthi Serrao came in, everyone had gone berserk.
If that were not enough, Harish Wadhwa sang an old romantic number in his inimitable, free-spirited voice for the benefit of the ladies (lead pic) and in effect, calling it a day. So what if he had got the wording all muddled up? He could get them all asking for more!
Renu Babani:
The crazy bunch, ever ready to prove they are part of the Club. Each one of us has the freedom of speech... unless someone can prove otherwise.
Harish Wadhwa:
* Today is my turn of a good pic! Be sure that I have not consumed sandhi sudha to act like this. It is the Blog Monster who must be dancing due to last night's hangover to click such an awful picture of mine like this! (LOL) To add to my misery, Geeta-ji is mocking at the way I walk.
* Like the Talking Trio, here is a good pic of the 'Laughing Trio'. I am sure this pic was taken when the hangover effect was gone!!!