Atherosclerosis?

Hari Singh Shekhawat

Just as things were looking up in the Garden, calamity has struck again. Shekhawat will have to undergo another critical surgery, this time on his left foot. Doctors are suspecting atherosclerosis, a cardio-vascular condition induced by the progressive hardening and narrowing of the arteries supplying blood to the feet.
“I have been told to get an MRI scan done by May 12,” he informed. “After that they will put me under the knife. There is no escape. The surgeon who would be doing the operation has told me that it would be no different from the procedure on my neck (carotid artery) in January.”
Shekhawat had gone yesterday for a scheduled check-up at the naval hospital in Colaba when his wife reminded him to raise the question of a nagging pain on his left foot. Not one to take such “irritants” seriously, he had been applying a certain oil/ lotion for the past couple of months, which helped in dulling the pain.

Fahmida Khan cuts her birthday cake

Still at his wife’s insistence, he brought it up with the doctor who promptly subjected him to a thorough body exam.
“He asked me to remove my clothes and lie down,” Shekhawat narrated. “Thereafter he and his assistants put me through a battery of tests with all kinds of machines. I had no idea what they were up to. In the end, when I asked if there was anything serious, the doctor said that ‘anything concerning blood vessels is serious’. Later on, after leaving the examination room, they gave me a clearer picture.”
For a 76-year-old, Shekhawat looked remarkably cool even as Yusuf Rassiwala, Rukhsana Khan, Swati Punjabi and others appeared very much worried for him. And later, when Fahmida Khan turned up to celebrate her birthday, Shekhawat was back to jumping all over the place with glee and playing the fool. He even tried to paint Fahmida's lips dark-brown with the birthday cake (under the watchful eye of her hubby) on the pretext of feeding her. After all, he has anointed her his 'saali’ and believes that after her husband, he enjoys the inalienable right to take liberties with her. A very Happy Birthday once again, Fahmida. That was a fantabulous treat!!!

First bite from hubby dearest

Shekhawat applies 'lipstick'

Kajal Babani presents club calendar

              Kiran Prakash: I hope and pray that all goes well with Shekhawat-ji. I am quite confident, the Naval Hospital doctors are competent enough to handle any ailment, big or small, which Shekhawat-ji is suffering from. And once again, a very happy birthday and many happy returns of the day to Fahmida. Incidentally, what Shekhawat does, only Shekhawat can do in this world. For such acts, you need to have a heart of steel and as pure as morning dew. Shekhawat-ji, may you continue to conduct yourself with such purity and firmness. Not everybody's cup of tea. I am proud of you.

Dilip Babani: Happy Birthday, Fahmida-ji. God bless you!

Siba Prasad Maitra: My salute to Mr Shekhawat for maintaining his cool and spirit throughout. I am sure he will come out of this challenge as this is not going to be a major surgery. We all from BIG LAAF are with him.

Lt Col Angad Singh (from Mohali): As a naval man, Shekhawat has faced many upheavals in high seas. He has come back always with flying colours. He will sail through the minor stream this time as well. Wishing him good health. Happy Birthday Fahmida-ji.

Picnic in the Air

Mallika Kagzi registered her return from Surat with 'jumbo' nankhatai, hot tea and lots of love. Nobody gave her a salute though – the way Kiran Prakash, Dilip Babani and Geeta Latte did on her

"Where to go this time?"

Mallika greets us with Surti nankhatai and tea

return from Hyderabad last month (ref post of April 14). But the happiness on having her back was evident in the jolly jousting and entertaining vibes exchanged with her throughout the morning.
In this air of easy camaraderie, Yusuf Rassiwala came up with the idea of “another picnic”. Obviously the one-day outing to Royal Hills Resort last month (April 3) did not count – nor did Matheran for that matter, as Dilip had proposed. “Let us go somewhere far,” Yusuf urged. “Why not do a foreign trip?”
This has come up at a time when Mumtaz Jahan is organising an eight-day trip to Kashmir between August 28 and September 4, 2016. For a price of Rs32,000 (inclusive of return air fare), she has drawn up an itinerary for Srinagar, Pahalgam, Sonmarg, Gulmarg, Achabal, Verinag and Doodpathri among other scenic spots in the Valley.
Significantly, many of these spots are away from the usual tourist trail and had been given a miss on the Club’s last trip to Kashmir (also conducted by Mumtaz) in August – September 2012. Yet, from all appearances, once is more than enough. As Shekhawat put it, “What is the point of going to the same place again?”
Likewise, Yusuf R is not inclined in repeating a trip to Kashmir and considering that the four extremities of the country have already been covered from the Club, he is pushing for an overseas trip this time around. For several other ‘Club trippers’ also, this is the most attractive option open – the only problem being that not everybody holds a passport.
In the past also, whenever Shekhawat had suggested a trip to Bangkok-Pattaya, the passport issue had come up as a major road block. Who knows, with Yusuf R taking the initiative this time, those interested would hurry up with making their passports. Or else, the trip would have to be limited to passport holders only. And that would mean a smaller-than-usual contingent.
Kiran Prakash:
* Arre kahi toh chalo. Do din Matheran ka hi chakkar laga kar aate hain. Shekhawat-ji, Yusuf-bhai kuchh karo. Otherwise now I will go alone. I am also in for the Bangkok trip. Do something organisers!
* And dear Blog Monster, to keep the record clean and straight, I salute our president, Mallika Kagji through this blog on her return from Surat.
Lt Col Angad Singh (from Mohali):
Being a change from the daily routine, a picnic is always welcome. You may go a few miles away or to a far-flung outstation. You forget the daily routine and learn a few lessons in new environments. Keep moving. This is life.

Casting a Spell

Laxmi Naidu cuts her birthday cake

Hypnotism is one of those rarefied areas in science that inspires naughty thoughts. You could charm your way into anybody’s heart, get a reluctant lover to dance to your tune, force your boss to grant an out-of-turn promotion, cast a spell on a bank manager to open his coffers to you, drive out of a car showroom with the latest limousine without paying for it… in short, get anybody to do anything at your bidding.
We had all been living under this misconception till Laxmi Naidu’s son, Rajiv showed up this morning at the Garden. A professional hypno-therapist, he had us spellbound as he cleared the air on the

Rajiv Naidu

common fallacies surrounding hypnotism, the benefits of self-hypnosis, past-life regression, the workshops he has been conducting and so on. “There are some 50 to 60 students training under me,” he revealed. “The idea is to dispel the many myths and misunderstandings people have about hypnosis.”
But first things first. Laxmi Naidu turned 70 today (“officially”)

Yusuf Rassiwala presents Laxmi her birthday calendar

and she was celebrating her birthday for the first time. “Where do people like us celebrate birthdays?” she quipped. “It’s all very fine for youngsters to make a big deal about it. For me it has always been like any other day -- a low-key affair. But this time my son insisted I should celebrate with everybody in the Garden.”
Apart from Rajiv, Laxmi had her grandson, Siddhant to be present on the occasion. The latter played the perfect host as he scurried around serving the batata-vada, dhokla and sundry eats washed down by hot, home-made tea.
The best part though, was Laxmi cutting her birthday cake, followed by Yusuf Rassiwala presenting her the Club calendar to a round of applause and much merriment. And as for Rajiv Naidu, watch this space. He has promised to hold a hypnotherapy workshop for us around mid-month. The exact date and timing is yet to be confirmed.
Kiran Prakash:
It was nice of Rajiv to join us in our celebration of Laxmi Naidu's birthday. Let us make it a practice to invite the families of members on occasion. Having a workshop with Rajiv on hypnotherapy will indeed be informative to all of us. In fact, I am keen to learn self-hypnosis.
Bhaswati Bose:
Why self-hypnosis? We should instead learn how to hypnotise members who are irregular so that they fall in line with the rest of the Club.
Lt Col Angad Singh (from Mohali):
It is heartening to note that Mr Rajiv Naidu is going to conduct a class for the benefit of our Club members. Mr Kiran Prakash can in turn teach other members who cannot learn the hypnotherapy now. I wish Mrs Laxmi Naidu a very happy birthday. Wishing her good health and a joyful life.
Kiran Prakash adds:
* Bhaswati-ji, you may hypnotise members who are irregular. But let me learn self-hypnosis for my own development. I am yet to learn a lot in life and if self-hypnosis helps me, I shall be ever grateful to Rajiv Naidu.
* Once again Happy Birthday and many happy returns to Laxmi Naidu.

Old Age Blues

Shekhawat had gone missing on April 27, his birthday. So he missed out on his birthday calendar. Today, Banoo Apa performed the 'unfinished business' by presenting him his annual gift on behalf of Big Laaf.
Banoo Apa, very graciously, also treated us to home-made lassi after the exercises. She need not have. But out of sheer love and concern, she provided us the much-needed relief and refreshment in glassfuls to beat the sweltering heat.

Banoo Apa hands out refreshing lassi

Kajal celebrates daughter's birthday

Nothing could have been more god-sent.
If that were not enough, Kajal Babani ushered in her daughter's birthday, a day in advance. She had the most sinfully divine chocolate cubes to offer – something that would stay with us forever for its aftertaste. We have seen Neelam grow up and even as she is married now and settled abroad, this is wishing her Happy Birthday today itself!
Meanwhile, Shekhawat had a ball with his long-standing sparring partner, Ram Shankar Shukla. At 80 years, the latter took offence to being called an “old man”.

Shukla-Shekhawat chukling together

Poring over Shekhawat's birthday calendar

Shekhawat tried to reason that there is nothing to be ashamed about growing old and even sang a Rajasthani folk ditty, “Aayo budhapa ayo re!” for Shukla’s benefit. “I am not old,” the octogenarian insisted.
“Okay, do you remember the days when you could run turrr-turrr all around? Nowadays, you walk haltingly. Tukur-tukur. Tukur-tukur.”
Shekhawat felt the man was hurt. “Look at me,” he said. “Earlier I would be after beautiful women, woo them, took my chances. Nowadays, I just sit quietly on a bench looking at the trees, listen to birds chirping. What else can I do?”
“You may be old, I am not,” Shukla maintained.
Right then another Club elder came hobbling, cutting across the Garden. “Watch him,” Shekhawat said. “He will sit down on a bench, open his bag, take out a bottle, drink water, cork it back. When age catches up, we like to follow a routine.”
The elderly gent took his seat and as if on cue opened his bag, took out a bottle, drank water and corked it back. Shukla stared at him amazed and then his face brightened. “You are right!” he said, chuckling with Shekhawat.
We may be intent on celebrating Shekhawat’s 76th birthday, but he is by far the youngest at heart among us.
Kiran Prakash:
Whether by stealing, begging or demanding, I managed to get 3 divine chocolate cubes from Kajal Babani. I have never had the opportunity to meet Neelam, yet my best wishes and blessings are always with her. Neelam, I wish you a very happy birthday on May 4 and many happy returns of the day. Do meet us when you are in India next. God bless you.
And Banoo Apa, thank you very much for the cool, sweet refreshing lassi. Banoo Apa, apka dil bahut bada hai. Even without a reason you have treated us on many occasions.
Kajal Babani:
Thank you for your wishes. There is no begging or demanding. When chocolates are on the spot we all become kids. All in fun. Will convey your wishes to Neelam.
Dilip Babani:
Banoo Apa, the lassi was really very nice. God bless you. We were thirsty because of the hot weather. Thank you very much.
Kiran Prakash adds:
Kajal-ji, are you indirectly suggesting that it was stealing (since you have not mentioned it)? And please also keep in mind that on such occasions -- just like your marriage anniversary on May 11 -- when you come with such divine chocolate cubes, the kid in me gets too excited. Kindly account for that too. Many happy returns of the day well in advance!

Ghostly Tales

Shekhawat left for Rajasthan on April 19 to attend the last rites of a relative in his village. He cremated two other people and returned to the Garden this morning with a load of ghostly tales from the village.
The one to have freaked him out most was about a neighbour he had known rather closely. “He was a clerk in the district court and by village standards, was doing quite well for himself,” Shekhawat narrated. “He made around Rs3,000 every day from typing applications for litigants. On that fateful day, he left home as usual in the morning and thereafter, for some mysterious reason, abandoned work and disappeared.”
It seems when the man did not return home at night, a ‘search party’ from the village went out and traced his footsteps from his place of work.

No Laughing Matter: Shekhawat speaks of his Rajasthan trip

“They crossed four wells on the way and landed on a fifth well where three people had committed suicide earlier. The villagers found his body inside. Now tell me, if a man had to leap to death, why did he have to leave the four wells behind and die here? Obviously the ghosts of the earlier deceased were beckoning him.”
Another spooky tale Shekhawat recounted was of a wealthy neighbour who had apparently everything going for himself. “His son is settled in Italy and sends Rs150,000 by bank transfer every month. He owned two buses that were let out on hire, not to mention several cars in his garage. One fine morning this man was found hanging from the ceiling. Nobody can explain why.”
Shekhawat concedes that the incredible summer heat in Rajasthan has made people’s “buddhi bhrasht”. But he is also convinced that there are higher powers at play driving perfectly sane and otherwise happy people into taking the extreme step. He makes no secret of his belief that a certain chudail residing in his village is behind all this and claims to have even caught sight of the apparition once. When asked how it looked, his reply was succinct: “It is neither male nor female!”
Lt Col Angad Singh (from Mohali):
Ghostly tales have been prevalent in the past, especially in villages. At times to frighten children, someone would act as a chudail or play similar antics. However, this had ill-effects on those children in later life. The incidents narrated by Shekhawat have its own harrowing history. Our sympathies are with the bereaved families. May they have the courage to bear the loss of their beloved ones.
Kiran Prakash:
I am happy Shekhawat-ji has come back to Mumbai and is out of sight of those village ghosts and chudails. But what surprises me now is the ghost appearing in today's blog. Is it the same one which Shekhawat-ji is describing or the Blog Monster's discovery? This story needs to be buried forever before the entire Garden is haunted by it!
Dilip Babani:
We need to be careful as there are already chudails in our Garden. They have reversed feet and hunt for dinner and lunch. These ghosts and chudails are roaming free in the form of beautiful girls and women. Those who are scared need to put on a tabeej from some tantric baba like Asaram Bapu.