Counter Productive

Making late-comers do sit-ups (yesterday’s post) has backfired badly. Far from enforcing punctuality, the fear of punishment had kept many members away from the Garden this morning. Not only did Harish Wadhwa and Ramila Mistry (who were pulled up yesterday) not turn up, even Khatoon Baig, who is unfailingly regular (but late at times) chose to stay away today. In fact, there were hardly any late-comers this morning!
Renu Babani made it a point to “mark” her attendance before starting her rounds of the Garden – lest she be taken to task for reporting late for the exercises. Only two brave ladies, Monthi Serrao and Geeta Sardhana joined the exercises behind time. All other habitual late-comers, including Kajal and Dilip Babani, Pratap Bhatt, Sushma Gupta, Prakash Motwani, Sandhya Narang and Kiran Sajjan preferred to skip the Garden altogether than show up late. “Dar gaye saare!” remarked Yusuf Rassiwala (right) who was himself making an appearance after two weeks.
Yusuf-bhai may draw comfort from being among the most punctual people, but his infrequent appearances have become somewhat of a joke. He has no answer why he does the vanishing act off and on. Someone asked him if he had a grudge against the Club and still, he had no answer. “Then why this kolaveri di (vicious rage)?” demanded Bhaswati Bose, invoking the current musical hit on the Net. Yusuf caught on and burst out laughing.
Srichand Arora (left) too became a subject of animated discussion. Unlike Yusuf, he is both regular and punctual about his morning routine. So his absence from the Garden for the third day running has sparked a great deal of speculation and anxiety among members. Shekhawat has been trying repeatedly to call him, but “his phone is coming continually switched off”. Let us hope this should find him in fine fettle and that there’s no cause for worry.
Renu Babani:
Seriously, the members haven't taken Mrs Khan's reprimand to heart? I am sure those absent today had a valid reason, and not this petty issue. The males were far more in numbers today and this has become a habit now. The ladies were fewer in number and it's time for everyone to get back to their routine at the Garden. Strange, as humans, we tend to make so many excuses, but are they all really valid ones? So hopefully we will see more members tomorrow.
Bhaswati Bose:
All you late-comers don't worry, Teacher-ji will not make you murgas any more. So Dilip-bhai, Harish-bhai, Ramila, Kajal -- Why bunk-a, bunk-a, Come back-a, back-a... (to be read in rhythm with Kolaveri-di)!
Dilip Babani:
Dar toh lagega hi! Murga banne mein takleef nahi hai; par murga banne mein pant fhat sakti hai peeche se, aur izzat ka falooda ho jayega. Otherwise nobody is afraid. Class ke bachche bahut ustad hai masti karne mein -- bas bahana chahiye.

Punishment!

Nahid Khan (in fuschia, foreground) had a sudden brainwave this morning. Being made to conduct the exercises, she began to crib about having to stand in the middle every day while others stayed away, refusing to leave the comfort of their homes. “Those who come to the Garden should at least make an effort to be in time,” she observed. “Today I will punish all late-comers. I will make them murga!”
Instantly all eyes turned towards the gate. And there, sure enough was Harish Wadhwa walking in without a care in the world. The moment he joined the circle, the ladies pounced upon him. Taken aback, he looked around helplessly. “Late kyun aaye?” Nahid demanded. “Murga bano!” Lest things get any worse, he obediently held his ears and did a sit-up on the spot.
Next to walk in was Ramila Mistry. Being more circumspect by nature, she wasn’t going to do sit-ups easily. She bent forward from her position in the circle, jerked her head left and right repeatedly like a parakeet and concluding that everybody was insistent, she just smiled, caught her ears and bit her tongue apologetically.
Geeta Sardhana was next. Dressed in black from top to bottom, she dismissed the idea saying that she was already a “kali murgi”. However, the best reaction was to come from Monthi Serrao (right). Unable to make sense of “murga bano”, she asked innocently: “Desi murga ya English murga?” Geeta immediately counseled her, “Kuchh bhi chalega!” Monthi was still at sea: “Magar gauti murga boil honei ko time lagta hai!”
Only later, when the laughter subsided, did she figure out what the punishment was about and that Harish had already done his bit of a sit-up. She gamely crossed her arms, held her ears and said: “Harish-bhai ko toh practice hai murga banne ka. His wife is a teacher.” Suddenly Sitaram Hivarkar waddled in, in slomo, and the ladies were back at their best behaviour. Nobody dare accost him.
Amidst all the bonhomie, Pratap Bhatt (left) dropped by to inform that his wife has been discharged (see yesterday’s post) and is back home, recuperating. He had taken a calculated risk in getting the spinal surgery done when the doctors had given him a 10 per cent chance of success. The lady is now able to walk, he says. All’s well that ends well.
Dilip Babani (right):
Murga bano, all late-comers! Arora-ji dar ke maarey aaj nahi aaye. Late ho gaya toh murga ban-na parega. Harish-bhai murga bana kya, ab toh saarey members jaldi aah jayenge darr ke maarey!
Frankly, I am afraid of all the ladies. Today Bhaswati told me to become murga because of late-coming. I did not understand why she was telling me since the exercises had already finished. From tomorrow, I will come before 7.00 a.m.; or else, I will not come at all. I do not want to become murga. I am serious. Dear Arora-ji, please tell all the ladies to cancel this type of punishment. You are the president of the Club. Please save us. Whatever you say, will be done!

Dark Morning

The mornings are getting darker as the sun takes longer to rise. Our members are taking even longer to rise (from their beds), resulting in a sharp increase in the number of late-comers. Today, being the beginning of the week, many simply gave up even trying to visit the Garden. Srichand Arora, Sitaram Hivarkar, Razia Khan and Bhaswati Bose were among those who stayed away.
Consequently, we had to make do with Kishor Babani’s recordings of sufi songs and jokes' narration for all our entertainment of the morning. Only towards the end of the exercises did Bapu Rane become his sprightly self, making funny noises and imitating others, including Ved Prakash Grover’s high-pitched laughter. It must be said that this 69-year-old gent is getting younger and incredibly agile for his age with each passing day.
In every other way, it was an uneventful morning – though news of Pratap Bhatt’s wife having undergone a surgery for her cervical column last week took many by surprise. She is still under observation and post-operative care at Lilavati Hospital, Bandra – which accounts for Bhatt’s absence from the Garden during the past fortnight or so.
Vasudev Bhateja (left) of the Yoga Group came with another piece of disturbing news. He had four shops near Crawford Market which have been reduced to ashes in the blaze last Saturday. The shops were rented out and he isn’t even sure about their insurance status. So disturbed is he that he did not have the heart to go and see what is left of the shops. Worse, his wife is currently hospitalized.
We can only commiserate with him in this dark hour.

Renu Babani:
Yes, let us pray for the speedy recovery of Mr Bhatt's wife. Hopefully, she should be home soon.
Mr Vasudev looked upset, which is understandable. It must be hard on him and his family. May God give him the inner strength during this tough time.
Today was a normal Monday morning. Naturally, after the weekend, everyone was in their own world. Tuesday's turnout should be better.

Day 483

Pic of the Week

Anybody, having any idea, why this lady looks so frightened?

Renu Babani:
"Ooh lala, Ooh lala... Meri gaadi kisney chori kee!"

Kishor Babani:
"Yeh toh meri gaddi hai. Chor ne colour change kiya hai. Ooh lala, Ooh lala..."

Anonymous:
GAADI MIL JAYEGI, OOH HAA HAA!
MERI GAADI KO CHURANE WALE KO BHOOTH BANA DOONGI, OOH HAA HAA!!!

26/11

Today was the third anniversary of the terror attack on Mumbai. What better occasion could there be for making a special appeal to the Almighty to help channelise our energies into positivity? Our “guest sardar” (below) delivered this ardaas on what we were to realize, was his last day at the Garden.
Tomorrow, Tohba Singh would be back home in Faridabad. But as he was to say, he would continue to pray for us and start a Laughter Club like ours there. He was here briefly, to be with his son and had literally “strayed” into our group in the course of his morning visits to the Garden. And what a change this has brought about in him over the month he has been exercising with us! He used to be so feeble and frail, barely able to move his limbs. Quietly, he would sit on a faraway bench observing us and occasionally, clap on his own.
Then one day, he invited himself into our circle. We soon realized that he was a man of few words, but enjoyed our company and did not mind being corrected by Srichand Arora and Nahid Khan whenever he went wrong on executing an exercise. For his age and physique, he displayed remarkable flexibility and an eagerness to learn such that over time, he could pull off some of the most complex numbers with effortless ease. Most importantly, he did not miss a single day of the exercises. His appearance also changed. From white kurta-pajama and orange patka, he turned out in smart track pants, tees and turbans of varied hues.
We do not know Tohba Singh well. We might never see him again. But we are glad to see off a man, completely recharged and rejuvenated.

Usual Humdrum

The slap on Union Minister Sharad Pawar’s face yesterday found an echo at the Garden today as Hari Naraiyani kept teasing Bapu Rane on how his “brother” received a resounding thappad in Delhi. Rane was not one bit amused and tried changing the subject to Sachin Tendulkar getting his 100th international hundred today. “Let us all pray that he scores the century this time,” Rane appealed for the master batsman, who was stuck on an overnight total of 67-not out – 33 runs short of the magic figure.
Rane was so preoccupied with the fate of his ‘living god’ that nothing else mattered to him during the exercises. Not that there was much to engage him (or anybody else), except that Razia Khan and Nafisa Syed have resumed coming to the Garden. The former had sprained her waist – prompting Arora to quip that she could as well have left her waist behind at home before coming. Harish Wadhwa also showed up, having returned from Bangalore at one in the morning. Shekhawat got busy with mobilising everybody for the weddings coming up next month while Renu Babani enquired about booking tickets for the latest potboiler in town – Desi Boyz. Kishor said his jokes and Bose smoked his cigarettes...
In sum, the usual humdrum.
Renu Babani:
DESI BOYZ! What can one say of a movie (left) starring John Abraham and Akshay Kumar? Yea, the heroines, Deepika Padukone and Chitrangada were there to add some romance and colour. The story line is basically about recession and during such trying times, our two heroes end up as male escorts. Thus begins the song-and-dance, apart from John trying to hide the truth from his lady love Deepika. The funny part is Akshay going to college to get a good education and a degree! The end is predictable as in all movies. It was entertaining no doubt and if you are willing to sit back, relax and leave behind all your daily stresses, maybe this is a good stress buster!
Anonymous:
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Movers and Shakers

Hari Singh Shekhawat and Nahid Khan are back. Counted among the regulars and movers-and-shakers of the Club, their absence, even for a brief period, is felt by all. With their return, we are back to our normal complement of members for the exercises. As one who loves fishing for compliments, Nahid went one step further: “The Garden has got back its raunaq (lustre)!”
Nahid (below) had gone to Shirdi last Sunday. Upon returning, her daughter developed symptoms of severe food poisoning and had to be hospitalized. The girl was discharged yesterday and is now recuperating at home. This morning, the mother marked her attendance by distributing prasad from the Sai Baba shrine.
Shekhawat was away at Bikaner to attend a wedding. It was the second wedding in his family (within a fortnight) and thankfully, he looked hale and hearty (above), having well survived the rigors of travel and the by-now famous free-floating chudails of Rajasthan. Unlike the earlier two trips, he showed no signs of any hangover this time.
The continued absence of members like Yusuf Rassiwala, Nafisa Syed and Razia Khan however, remains a cause of concern. They too are senior members and have been active in the day-to-day affairs of the Club. According to Khatoon Baig, there are no festivals at this time of the year to keep them all away. “It is nothing but sheer laziness on their part,” she insists.
Srichand Arora’s take on Yusuf-bhai’s absence is more telling: “He is as irregular (in attendance) as he is regular!”
Renu Babani:
Our "principal"/ "daddy" is back and the group is heaving a sigh of relief. I guess it could be because Mr Shekawat seems fine and perhaps even scared away the chudails. Some members seem to be affected by the weather. I guess seeing it so dark outside does make one lazy. However, please do return. We miss you because it has become a habit of meeting every morning!

Pit Stop

Those arriving at the Garden before time have found a lovely pit stop near the gate. Stretching over three benches (left), this is where they cool their heels after a walk and till the signal is given for the exercises to start, they would be shooting the breeze and pondering over grave worldly issues – from movie stars and cricket to commodity prices, BlackBerry and You Tube. Kishor Babani would serve his ‘starters’ for the morning – today’s special being on animals joking about an anatomical peculiarity in human beings. The discussions also veered around the school Ram Shankar Shukla runs during the day and the bizarre trend of suicide tourism. It is at this spot that the Chandaal Chaukdi had first set up base (see post of 27/12/2010), before graduating to form the Badmaash Company.
By and large, the pit stop puts everybody in a cheerful mood for all the fun and games that follow during the exercises. Sadly though, Bapu Rane’s exuberance misfired twice this morning. The first time was when he enthusiastically greeted Monthi Serrao (right) with his trade-mark “Namaththe” which was more in the nature of pelting stones at her. Quick on the uptake, she made a gesture of gathering the stones and throwing them back at him repeatedly. Then later, for some strange reason, he had to address Santosh Tyagi as “Santosh Bhai”. The lady did not respond as this was towards the end of the exercises. But Rane knows well enough that he has not heard the end from her.
Incidentally, Harbans Singh (left) has left for Ludhiana today for her winter sojourn. In all likelihood, she will not return before her birthday on the 29th of this month. So let us wish her good health and many, many happy returns of the day -- in advance.
Renu Babani:
All in a day's work! The discussions that go on between the gentlemen before the exercises is known to the ladies and the rest through this blog. No wonder, being so engrossed in conversation they have to be reminded to make a move. The past few days have seen more male members which is surprising, but I am sure this is short-lived. Nafisa Syed, Razia Khan and Nahid Khan were absent this morning. Yusuf-bhai seems to have gone back to his old ways, deciding not to attend the morning sessions. Let's hope the females are back in regular numbers.

Neo Converts

A morning of incessant cackle and buk-buk with not one, not two, but three nodal points of discussions during the exercises. While one was engaged with the weddings coming up (in Sunita Jajodia’s and Geeta Sardhana’s households) next month, another was busy speculating over whether Sachin Tendulkar would score his 100th Test century at Wankhede today.
In the middle was Srichand Arora, as usual taking pot shots at anybody and everybody. At one point, he pulled up the ladies (without naming names) for being inattentive and the very next moment, he himself went on to compliment Santosh Tyagi for looking half her age after colouring her hair. The latter, who had returned from attending a wedding at Delhi last week, hurriedly assured him that it was no more than “chaar din ki chandni” (a four-day wonder) in order to deflect his attention to some other subject. Never short of ideas and quick to think on his feet, Arora continued to amuse with his one-liners and wise-cracks right through the exercises.
The funny thing about this non-stop jabber is that some people who used to be quite reticent and completed their exercises without uttering a word, have suddenly become talkative now. Khatoon Baig is one such convert. Harish Wadhwa is another. Monthi Serrao is yet another. Even Ved Prakash Grover lets out fast ones at odd moments. The biggest convert though is Sitaram Hivarkar (left), the stern disciplinarian who used to scoff at anybody taking liberties during the exercises. These days, he not only enjoys our jokes, but gamely participates in all the leg-pulling and merriment around. He even joined the Badmaash Company this morning for the tea session after the exercises. Talk of laughter being contagious…
Renu Babani:
When in Rome, do as the Romans do! This adage is true for all of us. Each member makes sure he/she has something to say. All of us are known for blaming one another for starting the incessant chatter although we can't do without it as well.
The Boses are back. Mrs Bose was looking radiant, making some of us believe that the Delhi weather has something to do with such changes in Santosh Tyagi and Mrs Bose. Is there a fountain of youth out there? Perhaps some of us should check it out!
Anonymous:
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Quick Recap

Yup, the blog is back. RENU BABANI has, very helpfully, provided a recap of all that transpired during the past three days at the Garden:
Friday, 18/11
Today was full of activity. Santosh Tyagi returned from her Delhi trip and distributed rewri among members. Everyone teased her for looking so young and radiant. Eventually she couldn't take it any more and said she was not Santosh, but “Santosh's sister”! Everyone laughed and teased her more.
Shekhawat informed that he'd be catching the morning flight tomorrow to attend another wedding at his hometown and be back by the 24th.
Geeta Sardhana (below, right) arrived with a wedding invitation in hand. She read out the scroll to all present. Her daughter is getting married on December 18, at the ISKCON temple in Juhu.
Yes, we did miss the Boses, who are regulars. They have left for Delhi and am sure will have a great time. Here's wishing them a blast and safe trip back home.
Saturday, 19/11
Despite being a Saturday, the turnout was good. Neelam Garg turned up surprisingly. There were initially just three regular gentlemen, who shifted from their regular seating area when it was 7 a.m. and sat down on the bench where the exercises would begin. They looked around lost until Sunita Jajodia came towards them and said in her usual booming voice, “Chalo, utho!” They stood up, laughing non-stop and by the time the Ram Ram Bol was done, there were the regulars – Srichand Arora, Razia Khan and Nahid Khan.
Monthi Serrao asked Bapu Rane why he never wished her and someone said that he was shy. I wonder?
Although part of the Badmaash Company went for tea (joined by the ladies), it was different as the Boses were not present. Everyone misses them – especially Mr Bose's cheerful face early morning. Yes, despite "Madam Baatuni" not being around, the chatter didn't stop, making Nahid Khan say in exasperation that from now on, she will bring a danda. A wisecrack commented that even that will be broken by someone!
Monday, 21/11
The Monday Morning Blues got everybody today. There were just three males and two females who started the Laughter Round. Slowly, the members began arriving and things got back to normal.
Initially everyone followed Srichand Arora rather quietly, till the Lene-Dene number. The target this time was Renu Babani. Arora felt that her actions seemed to indicate that she was shooing away her hubby, Kishor Babani!
Nafisa Syed (left) returned from Lucknow with a box of pedas, which were relished by members. The last one to arrive was Sitaram Hivarkar. I guess it has become routine for members to arrive at leisure and the rest have now got used to it.
The Boses should be back from Delhi today and hopefully, shall be seen at the Garden tomorrow.
Kishor Babani:
Welcome home, Blog Monster! Where are the pictures of our Shah Rukh Khan and his heroine, Sushmita Sen from their Delhi trip? Ho! Ho!! Ho!!!

Sorry!

Will Be Back
after a
SHORT BREAK

Dilip Babani:
Have a nice trip and be happy. Enjoy!
Srichand Arora:
Who wanted this short break? For all of us, it is a very long break!

Freewheeling Funsters

You don’t need to skid over a banana peel to get a laugh. Nor is it necessary to make silly faces, create embarrassing situations or mock other people’s misfortunes, follies or deformities… Common everyday situations provide enough material for generating laughter – provided of course, you have a sense of humour.
Leave aside the past-masters in our group like Srichand Arora, Kishor Babani and Nafisa Syed who have an inborn flair for comedy. Instead, take Hari Naraiyani (right) for example. Returning to the Garden after a long hiatus, he is a master at deadpan humour. Least bothered about whatever happens around, he inhabits his private universe, exercising at his own pace, discontinuing at will and choosing his moments to pick a fight. Whatever he does is always funny. The funniest part though is when he sings along with the music in the background, completely off-key and oblivious to others laughing at him.
Cricket-crazy Bapu Rane (left) is another natural. Every morning he comes with a new prank up his sleeve – whether it is his jack-in-the-box antics or letting out peculiar sounds of wailing babies and animals, or interrupting the exercises with sudden barks of “Namaththey”, “Jai Thri Kritna”, “Thath Thriyakal” – even an odd “Good Morning” reserved exclusively for Monthi Serrao. Silence is total anathema to him.
And then, who can ignore Sunita Jajodia (right)? Much as she does not usually stick around till the end of the exercises (due to certain domentic obligations), her presence is always larger than life. A wonderful person at heart, she is much misunderstood because of her sharp tongue – which becomes her USP and makes everybody crack up at every verbal lashing from her. Arora is probably the only one capable of taking her head on, as he did this morning. He abruptly stopped her from saying “kamra ghoomana” (as in “kamar ghoomana” or “roll your hips”), only to apologise later. By then, the lady had forgotten about it!
These three may not be as proactive as others in our day-to-day activities. But they surely lend colour and character to the Club. They also serve.
Renu Babani (left):
Fun, laughter, mimicry, crazy antics... all these ingredients make for a beautiful morning. Everyone has his/her own way of adding to that one hour when we are together. So, unique and rare, that even those on the track pay heed to what goes on. We have that influence, not only on each other, but on outsiders too, who like 'migrating birds' join in the exercises when they feel like. If this is not a special group, then what is?
Harish Wadhwa (right):
Nice and encouraging words about some of our members, Blog Monster. All the funsters joke and laugh, spreading their infectiously broad smiles... They are true gentlemen at heart. I only wish that each one of us, smile and laugh throughout our lives as we do at the Garden everyday. Laughing Club (Big Laaf), Zindabad!

Run Kishor, Run!

The picture alongside captures the mood a Kishor Babani-joke typically evokes every morning. Such free-spirited laughter, so spontaneous and natural, can rarely be seen anywhere. Even the ladies – especially the two in the foreground, Nahid Khan and Khatoon Baig – would probably not know that they can laugh so wholeheartedly.
So, what was so funny as to have triggered such an exuberant reaction?
Well, the joke Kishor (below) narrated today, was as follows: A roadside beggar sees a young, beautiful girl and instantly falls in love. He proposes to her: “I love you; I want to marry you.” The girl gives him one dirty look and says, “I’d rather die than marry you.” Crestfallen, the beggar grumbles: “Kambakht mar jayegi, par ek gareeb ka bhala nahi karegi (Damn, she will die but not help a poor man)!”
Now compare this with what Arora describes as the “nashta” (snacks) Kishor serves during the tea session of the Badmaash Company outside the Garden. Today’s joke ran like a riddle: “What is the activity that leaves a man exhausted in 15 minutes, but a woman would like to go on and on with? What is that act?”
Bose wickedly proposed that this could well be narrated at the Garden. “Jootey padenge,” Kishor warned, chickening out. “We’ll get beaten up,” agreed Harish. But Bose was persistent, arguing that it was an innocuous joke. “At least, let’s test their reaction,” Arora reasoned. “If they get worked up, the four of us will be outside the Garden in no time.”
“I have a better idea,” interrupted Harish. “I’ll read out the joke saying that it has been written by Kishor and that he wanted Bose to read it, but when Arora-ji intervened… All of you should be around me and at the slightest hint of trouble, head straight for the Gate and keep on running and running. Don't even look back!”
By the way, the answer to that riddle is – "Shopping".
Renu Babani:
Well, one thing for certain regarding the final joke: The response of the ladies would be scrutinizing, dirty looks and disapproving stares. These gentlemen would be standing by the Gate even before daring to say such a joke. That way, once the answer is given, each one of them would have either disappeared or wished the ground beneath them would open up! The Badmaash Company must best keep such jokes to themselves if they know what is best for them!
Harish Wadhwa:
Well, it may be a blessing that not all members read the blog when it comes to live coverage of "BC" like this. At least, not the conservative kind, who may make a mountain of a molehill. For sure, the four of us would be beaten up or thrown out of the Garden, if they did!
Bhaswati Bose:
What a DIRTY PICTURE that would be!

Late Latifs

As winter sets in and the morning gets darker by the day, we are witnessing a peculiar phenomenon. The incidence of late-coming is on the rise. Even Nahid Khan, Bapu Rane and Razia Khan who were known for their punctuality, have begun to show up behind schedule. Of course, by the end of the exercises, we manage to muster a complement of 20-odd members. But most of them are regretfully, late latifs.
Today, only the Babani couple, Kishor and Renu had landed before their usual time. By the time the exercises were to start, we were barely half-a-dozen in the Garden. None of the so-called ‘teachers’ who conduct the exercises were present. Eventually, a reluctant Sunita Jajodia had to be dragged into the ring to set the ball rolling – till Razia turned up and took charge.
What is it about winter mornings that keep people longer in bed than usual? When you have to get up in any case and trot up to the Garden, you might as well do so in good time. Srichand Arora cut an odd picture (right) today by absenting himself during the exercises but strangely enough, showing up to buy milk near the Garden gate. He tried his best to evade detection – looking unrecognizable as it was in never-seen-before peacock green singlet and shorts – but ultimately, could not escape the eye of the camera.
Meanwhile, the ladies of the Club kept their appointment with Ranbir Kapoor and his latest starrer, Rockstar (above). After much planning and dithering, Renu and Kajal Babani, Monthi Serrao and Bhaswati Bose caught up with the noon show at the neighboring Cinemax multiplex. Their next target is Vidya Balan – The Dirty Picture, releasing December 2.
Renu Babani:
The dark, gloomy morning is a real put off to get up and reach the Garden on time. Hats off to those who are in the habit of reaching early and sticking to their routine, no matter what the weather may be. The late comers -- well, let's be happy that they make the effort to attend the exercise sessions, in comparison to those who don't come at all. The movie was good and the credit goes to Ranbir Kapoor who carried the movie on his shoulders. We ladies had fun being together, chatting and laughing at the slightest comments amongst us. The movie was followed by lunch at the mall before we headed home. Yes, next month another outing and we shall have fun once more!

Day 472

Pic of the Week Why are the ladies looking so terrified?

Kishor Babani:
Even Amitabh Bachchan will wonder: Who is this man taller than me?

Renu Babani:
How do we tell him to please move, so that our pic can be taken more clearly?

Bhaswati Bose:
When did Qutub Minar shift from Delhi to Mumbai?

Dilip Babani:
Targola kabhi Mumbai ayya?

Harish Wadhwa:
STANDING TALL, MY SMILE SAYS IT ALL!
I am so happy being here to spread happiness with all my friends at the Garden.

In the Mood

Being a Saturday, everybody was in an unusually boisterous mood today. Like a well-earned weekend break, all 22 members, to the last late-comer, were out to play the fool – to the extent that exercises began almost 15 minutes behind time. Despite repeated requests and reminders, the discussions on the sidelines never seemed to end. And at the centre of it all was our ‘principal’, Srichand Arora.
So was it any surprise that today, for the first time, he had to be reminded of his role on “maintaining discipline in the class”?
When Yusuf Rassiwala pulled him up for not concentrating enough on the exercises, Arora looked completely bewildered for a moment, only to growl back, eyes popping out: “Aye, how dare you scold me!” But it was in jest. For within moments, he was back to his jovial self, taking digs at whoever he fancied and keeping everybody amused. And then, just when Geeta Sardhana was seen to be also taking liberties, he held up the exercises and glowered angrily at her. She took the hint and was back at her place – though for a few minutes.
The constant see-saw in behaviour was no less entertaining, which prompted Dilip Babani to comment that he only wished Arora “stayed in the same mood” throughout the year. “Why are you all targeting me today?” was the instant retort. But at the end of the exercises, Arora made up for being hard on Geeta and presented her with a bunch of white flowers (above, left), plucked from a shrub close to where we exercise.
Renu Babani:
Did anybody seriously think that Mr Arora would upset his sister in any way? Those flowers were a sign of making peace and showed the real bro-sis relationship. Today was really the week-end and it showed among the members. Everyone had decided to pass remarks before leaving home. The hour passed so swiftly, not forgetting Kishor's jokes that, as always, ended the session on a high note. I am sure everyone has gotten used to this daily dose of fun and laughter and somehow, all of us know that it will always remain that way.
Dilip Babani:
We all must obey our beloved Arora-ji. We cannot target him. We just have some fun during the exercises so that everybody laughs. If you are in a good mood, you can exercise better. We are not against anybody. All members are innocent. Nobody even thinks of hurting anybody in any way. But all are free to speak and laugh.

11.11.11

What’s so special about today’s date that’s driving everybody crazy? Many people cannot wait till tomorrow to buy a house, car, cell phone, utensils... whatever. Some lovelorn couples are determined to elope should their parents not give them away in marriage today. Even babies are in a hurry to be born like there’s no tomorrow!
But how did this once-in-a-century date play out for us at the Garden?
One, Sitaram Hivarkar kick-started the exercises with a “Hei-shaa, now pay attention please!”
Two, Srichand Arora came sporting a brand new T-shirt and raised an accusing finger at Geeta Sardhana for being over-talkative.
Three, Kishor Babani played only Kishore Kumar songs.
Four, the ‘Jingle Bell’ sardar-ji (of November 8 post) introduced himself as Tohba Singh from Delhi – temporarily stationed in Mumbai, visiting his son.
Five, a huge dried branch broke off a tree on its own and landed right where we exercise. We reached there rather late.
Six, a graceful young man with beard performed tai-chi with a lovely girl in red near us, providing wonderful visual entertainment.
Seven, Bapu Rane reported spotting Hari Singh Shekhawat on TV last evening. He wasn’t sure if there was also a chudail (witch) lurking anywhere closeby...
So that’s broadly how the morning of 11.11.11 unfolded for us. Big deal, huh!
Dilip Babani:
Why is Arora-ji angry? Please don't make him angry. You should all do your exercises quietly. If you want to talk, do so ishare se. By ishare se, you can talk a lot without disturbing others!

Gurpurab Greetings

Guru Nanak Jayanti. On the birth anniversary of one of the greatest apostles of peace, the first Sikh guru, let us rededicate ourselves to a life of righteousness and compassion, free from all temptation, hatred, fear and prejudice. For sweetness of action and absence of pride and ego, says Nanak, is the essence of all godliness. Guru Nanak Dev-ji de prakash utsav di lakh lakh vadhayee sabhaanu!
As expected, few turned up this morning for the exercises. The others would have gone for the prabhat pheri around Lokhandwala – or probably, they hadn't. Only Srichand Arora thought it necessary to drop by and excuse himself, before joining the procession as it took the turn on the road opposite the Garden.
Mass absenteeism on public holidays has become somewhat a regular practice these days. Taking an off on Sundays is bad enough. But on Dussehra, Eid, Diwali… and now Guru Nanak Jayanti? We seem to be behaving like government employees who need just about any excuse to abscond.
Nevertheless, we had our spot of sunshine with a couple of ‘guests’ (left) joining us for the exercises. Ten-year-old Shayan came in holding his mother’s hand to pay gran’ma Razia Khan a surprise visit. The little boy was initially taken aback by our antics. But when it came to the Laughter Session, he just could not hold himself. He was in splits watching grown-ups burst out guffawing, then tittering and giggling, suddenly making faces at one another, then snarling like animals… all for no reason.
Obviously, we were more than too much for him. Magar-much, as his gran’ma likes to say!

Renu Babani:
Yes, today was a special day for many members. Guru Nanak Jayanti was celebrated in all its glory, starting at 5.30 a.m. with the prabhat pheri. The crowds kept on increasing as we stopped along the way to receive prasad. The atmosphere was filled with chants and religious hymns. Although many were unknown faces, people greeted one another with smiles and it seemed as though we were one during that short time.

Anonymous:
Wonderful! You have written so nicely about Guru Nanak Jayanti. Thanks a lot. Keep it up, Blog Monster. I love you.

Situation Comedy

Like many fun-loving people, our members can boast of a natural sense of humour. They can match the very best stand-ups with fresh, breezy jokes, witty one-liners, sharp repartees and generally, a penchant for playing the fool. But when it comes to situation comedy, there are few who can rival us. People need to learn from the likes of Srichand Arora, Geeta Sardhana, Kishor Babani and Nafisa Syed how to raise a laugh out of a commonplace situation every morning – with a similar set of characters sharing the same space and environment… except that there is no camera rolling, no studio audience and certainly, no scripts. The fun never ends.
Thus, when Kishor addresses Yusuf Rassiwala as “Jai Ho Orange Topiwale Pandurang Baba”, it is always funny. He’d have said this several times before, but it is the moment he chooses that makes the greeting so special every time. Likewise anybody can imitate anybody, but when Nafisa decides to mimic somebody, it is always hill-lorious. Or say Razia Khan today: Fed up with the constant chatter around her while conducting the exercises, she just threw up her hands at the talkative ladies and wailed: “This is not too much, three much, four much… this is magar-much!” Or Geeta wondering aloud whether Hari Singh Shekhawat could now be doing the Slow-and-Fast laughter round with the chudail (witch) in his village every morning...
No matter what others might think, moments like these make our day!
Bhaswati Bose:
Don't be surprised if somebody makes a TV serial on our Laughing Club. Maybe, even a film! It will be a super hit.

“Jingle Bell”

Jingle Bell jingled today. The exercises and prayers had just about got over when, much to everybody’s surprise, he launched off on a wordy spiel about self realization, service to fellow beings and spiritual fulfillment. Quoting from the Guru Granth Sahib, he enjoined us to enshrine the Lord’s name in our heart. A much-absorbed Srichand Arora and Ved Prakash Grover (in pic) hailed the Lord, “Wahe Guru Ji Ka Khalsa…” at the end of the sermon.
The name, “Jingle Bell” was given by Nafisa Syed to this wizened, old Sikh who has been visiting us at the Garden for the past fortnight. Dressed in white pajama-kurta with beard left open, he used to sit quietly at a distance on a bench, observing us as we exercised. At times he would chuckle to himself at our jokes, looking every bit a bemused Santa Claus.
Then one day, his appearance changed. He turned up in grey track suit, his beard knotted under his chin and with an orange patka on his head. Grover surmised that he must be the “sardar’s brother”. Only when he joined us in the circle to exercise, did we recognize him to be the same old man. Since that day, he has been showing up in different attire, regularly taking part in the exercises, but largely keeping to himself.
This morning he broke his silence. His sermon comes a couple of days ahead of Guru Nanak Jayanti (November 10). Who knows, there could be a deeper significance to all this... Seriously, why should a holy man want to have anything to do with us?
Renu Babani:
Obviously because we have a magnetic pull on people. Our carefree, happy-go-lucky attitude has a positive effect on everyone. Aren't we lucky to have one another and be able to make others laugh? What an amazing group!

Baqrid Greetings

Early morning, Pratap Bhatt was spotted running at breakneck speed across the bridge overlooking the Garden. Within minutes he appeared at the Gate and straightaway joined us for the exercises, panting heavily. Nobody was chasing him. Later, he was to narrate how a devout Muslim family in his building had, over the past month or so, fattened a goat for sacrifice on Eid-Al-Adha today. Last night, a prankster in the next-door apartment cut its tether and the goat ran for its life at breakneck speed, straight out of the building compound -- not to be sighted again.
Well, Eid Mubarak everybody!
The Garden wore a deserted look because of the festival. Many of the regulars had stayed away because of their early morning namaaz. From six members to eight, to nine… and with Bhatt joining in, we eventually reached a double figure count during the exercises. Razia Khan (right) is having an Eid get-together at her place this evening and has graciously invited everybody for dinner. Owing to the low turnout this morning, it is not clear how many will actually attend. Those who cannot, may please inform Razia on phone (26329662/ 9819090296) – just out of courtesy.
Meanwhile, we have another invite pending – to visit a gaushala (cow shelter) somewhere beyond Kalyan. Those eager to spend time away from home and be with the cows for free chai-nashta, may kindly pay Rs200 to Jagmohan in the Garden at the earliest. He will take care of the transport... and the rest!
Harish Wadhwa:
Eid Mubarak to all my 'brotheren' and 'sisteren'!

Day 465

Pic of the Week

Wah! What superb coordination!! Perfect synchronization of movement!!!

Renu Babani:
* "I shall show you how the exercise is done. No one can compete or do it better than me!"
* "We need some cool breeze so desparately that we are willing to move in any direction for a breath of fresh air!"

Harish Wadhwa:
Sequence the ladies in ascending order of the breathing exercise. Treat Razia-ji as No.1 and Nahid Khan-ji as No.6, going clockwise. The correct answer would be 1, 3, 2, 5, 4 and 6. Wah!

Childhood Reclaimed

If a consensus were to be taken on the most errant, talkative and distracting member of our Club, the choice would inevitably fall between Bhaswati Bose, Kajal Babani and Geeta Sardhana. Together they are known to make dhamaal during the exercises. The men are relatively restrained and peaceful. No matter how hard they might try, all of them put together can never match these three noisy petrels of the fairer sex.
Razia Khan has often tried to separate them and put an end to their non-stop jabber – to the extent of threatening to make the most talkative one stand in the middle. Of course, there are a few indulgent souls who feel that it is not fair to pick on the three because the Club gives them the only opportunity and license to relive their childhood. Besides, others are also ‘guilty’ of taking liberties in various degrees. In fact, many would concede that even in their childhood, they had not played the fool as much as they do these days at the Garden.
Thus it came as no surprise today that Nahid Khan should refuse to share space with Razia in the middle because “two swords cannot occupy the same sheath”. And that Srichand Arora would argue that there can always be “two plaits while braiding the hair” and Razia agreeing, just as there are two eyes and two ears to a face, but one nose, one mouth and one heart... “But it takes two hearts to be in love,” countered Arora.
Surely the most scatterbrained among kids would know better than be drawn into such senseless banter. But we like it this way. It is great fun!
Renu Babani:
Honestly, the main culprit who feels that without talking there is no fun is our dear Bathuni Mrs Bose (left). She can have an entire conversation till the completion of the whole exercise and still have more to say. Her sidekicks are invariably Geeta (below), Monthi and whoever is beside her. Yes, it is all in fun despite constant criticism and gentle chiding. No one bothers to abide by the words, "Quiet, please!" because it doesn't exist in our dictionary. We have our fun and at least, return home light-hearted and happy, not forgeting the silly grins on our faces for no reason!
Bhaswati Bose:
"Kuch toh log kahenge,
Logon ka kaam hai kehna..."
Dilip Babani:
Don't blame my sweet and innocent wife, Kajal (left). In Bhaswati's company, she gets spoiled. But there should be some entertaining people also. Otherwise life would become dull. Kajal is hazir-jawaab. When Bhaswati, Kajal and Renu-bhabi want to talk and do some masti, they should do it and make themselves happy. Nobody should object to it.
Bhaswati Bose:
"Jinke ghar sheeshey ke bane ho, Woh doosron ke gharo pe patthar nahi martey!"
Kajal Babani: Depends upon the size of the patthar!