Suspended

We are in a state of suspended animation. The blog will return
once the Club resumes normal activity. Till then, STAY SAFE.

Club Closed!

Gupta wants to know why he is prevented from entering the Garden 

Our worst fear came true this morning (ref yesterday’s post). A huge lock hung ominously on the Garden gate, barring entry ‘till further notice’.
This leaves us with no place to exercise together and effectively, the Club having to close down all operations for an indefinite period.
Shekhawat and Bijoy Gupta were particularly upset by this development even as they had been forewarned last evening (on their visit to the Garden) about this precautionary measure to stem the spread of the corona virus.
Shekhawat wanted to know why the same precautionary measure did not apply to the nearby Garden No 2 where footfall has always been much higher than ours. Gupta rued over “having no place to go for time pass” now that

Shekhawat with his mask

the Garden is closed.
Funnily, Gupta put the blame squarely on Shekhawat. “You are the only person in the Garden to wear a face mask,” he charged. “This way you have been attracting attention to yourself and giving the impression that you are sick. People are saying that a sick man is roaming loose and spreading the virus in the Garden.”
Others present, including Karun Sharma, Rufina Khan (who had come with her daughter) and Nand Ram were however, supportive of the Garden shutting down as a “necessary though unfortunate step” in view of the raging pandemic.
According to news reports, there have been 143 confirmed cases of infection across the country, 39 of them from Maharashtra. Of the three fatalities reported so far, one is from Mumbai.
In the absence of any clear indication of when the Garden would re-open, the general attitude was to ‘wait and watch’ how the situation unfolds from now on. In a best case scenario, we should count ourselves lucky if life returns to normal in the next three months.
Till then, Yusuf Rassiwala has advised that “we confine ourselves indoors and exercise at home”. There is always the telephone and Whatsapp, Twitter, Facebook, etc. to connect with one another during these trying times. Most important, STAY SAFE. And DON'T WORRY. BE HAPPY and REMAIN HEALTHY.

Indefinite Shutdown?

Uncertain Future: Members on a loose end this morning 

The Club is faced with a very real possibility of having to suspend all activities while the corona crisis persists. It is only a matter of time

Santosh Tyagi

before the Garden is shut down in order to prevent the spread of the virus.
Apparently all public parks and gardens in the locality, except for the neighbouring Garden No 2, have already been closed by the municipal authorities. Someone, it seems, had come last night to “check if all was well in this Garden”, informed the watchman today.
Many feel that the measure is to dissuade senior citizens, who frequent the Garden most, to leave their homes lest they catch the bug.

The Health Centre in the
Garden is already shut

They happen to be most susceptible to infection due to low body resistance/ immunity.
Santosh Tyagi has been told by her family to avoid going to the Garden for some time, till the situation eases. It was just the other day that she had resumed her exercise routine after several months. But then, Santosh suffers from high BP and

Lt Col Angad Singh (rtd)

severe blood sugar issues.
Likewise, Lt Col Angad Singh (rtd) has been advised to stay away from the Garden for the time being. Today he showed up at the gate while we were exercising, only to retrace his steps quickly. “What else could I do?” complained the 86-year-old on phone. “I must listen to my children.”
Rukhsana Khan has also been forbidden by her children to take public transport (she stays in Goregaon) in order to reach the Garden early morning. There are many others under similar instructions from home, just that they are not willing to talk about it.
Effectively, attendance has plummeted drastically of late, leaving us with barely a dozen to carry on with the exercises. Nahid Khan, Banoo Apa, Zarina Khan, Naheed Siddiqui, Razia Khan… are some of the key absentees these days. And among those who are still making it, a majority are bound to also drop out in the next few days. We can do little but to wait and watch.

Rescheduled

Bhaswati Bose

Our trip to Gir Forest is NOT cancelled (ref post of March 14). The resort has, as a special case, agreed to accommodate us in the latter half of October and adjust all advances paid by us without levying penalty or other charges. In effect, the trip stands POSTPONED.
Announcing this, Bhaswati Bose informed that we have managed to ensure that the booking amount will not be forfeited. “However, we will not get the benefit of off-season rates in October,” she clarified.

Lt Col Angad Singh (rtd) presents Kiran Prakash the birthday calendar

“There will be a marginal hike, but that is yet to be conveyed to us. The important thing is that our bookings are secure.”
There is also the question of a permit fee paid on jungle safari, which goes to the government. On Saturday when the resort was contacted, Sec 144 of CrPC (banning group tours) had not been invoked and it was presumed that the state government would not refund us the amount paid in advance. Now we stand a good chance of recovering

Peering into the birthday calendar

or readjusting that amount also.
The imposition of Sec 144 CrPC in the city yesterday cast a shadow on our gathering for the exercises this morning. Whether this could be interpreted as ‘unlawful assembly’ was open to question. Or must we stick to the letter of the order, which specifically bans group tours till March 31?
Either way, Bijoy Gupta had decided to hide behind Shekhawat should the police come to arrest us. “You are the chairman and you should take the blame,” he told his friend. “I will simply say that you had forced us against our wishes to come to the Garden. So you should be the one to be arrested!”
Be that as it may, the corona virus and the casualties being reported have made us extra cautious from today. We are keeping a distance of at least two metres between us during the exercises and at Angad Singh’s instance, have disallowed cold, exposed food such as idli-vada, etc.
For once, Kiran Prakash took the unpopular but responsible decision not to treat us to any foodstuff on his birthday today. All other rituals like raising the fourth laugh, singing the birthday song and presenting him with his birthday calendar were followed. We wish him again many happy returns of the day as also good health and contentment in life.

Exercise on 'social distancing' in the Garden

Post Script: The police have since issued a clarification on Twitter w.r.t. yesterday’s order: “It is a very specific order for tour operators to prevent danger to human life, health or safety. It should not be confused with the regular order issued u/s 144 CrPC.”

Karun Sharma:
Oh, I missed Kiran-ji's birthday celebration, but I convey my heartfelt wishes to him. I was ready to leave for the Garden but was stuck with some work. I had to also complete my exercise and walk nearby alone u/s 144 CrPC. The decision not to get outside food is very apt and we must do our best insofar as personal and social hygiene is concerned.

Bihari Milwani:
What a coincidence! Section 144 is imposed on the commencement of Mr Kiran Prakash's 72nd year i.e. half of 144. Many happy returns of the day to him.

DAY 3074

Pic of the Week

MINERAL WATER: "BETTER SAFE THAN SORRY"!!!
(Health Advisory issued for dogs in the Time of Corona) 

"Jo mineral water nahin pita, woh kutta hai." Anybody who doesn’t drink mineral water is a dog --Bihari Milwani

Called Off

It was Shekhawat's 60th wedding anniversary. Bihari Milwani (ext rt) gifts him a memento. 

Shekhawat treats us to idli-vada while the meeting on the Gir trip was on 

The Gir Forest trip, scheduled for March 18 to 22 (ref previous posts) has been called off. This decision was forced upon us following the state government's announcement yesterday shutting down all schools, malls, cinema halls, marriage parties, gyms, public gatherings, etc. so as to contain the corona virus epidemic.
Although inter-city train travel has not been disallowed, by invoking the draconian Epidemic Diseases Act of 1897 last evening (in addition to the existing Disaster Management Act) the government has made our position particularly untenable during the journey to and from the nearest railhead to Gir, i.e. Junagadh Station.
This piece of legislation empowers a government official, including ticket checkers and RPF cops to detrain any (or all) of us at any station on mere suspicion of being infected. It shall then be the duty of the station master to despatch the ‘suspect’ to the nearest civic hospital for a mandatory check-up and possible quarantine for 14 days.
This is over and above the actual risk of contracting the virus from co-passengers during travel or being faced with a lockdown in the city upon return or even the train getting cancelled either way. The uncertainties weighed heavily upon us as also the very real possibility of forfeiting the entire amount paid in advance for our stay, transport and jungle safari should we now cancel the trip.
Matters were brought to a logical head by Kiran Prakash who, in a rare outburst, exhorted everyone to pay heed to their health rather than being hung up on the money they would stand to lose by cancelling the trip. Yusuf Rassiwala and Zarina Khan revealed how their folks at home also had misgivings on the trip in present circumstances. Even Shekhawat insisted on scrapping the trip forthwith.
Finally, a consensus was reached. It was decided to postpone the trip, preferably to October, by which time the corona scare is likely to subside. Much would of course, depend on whether the resort hosting us at Gir is amenable to our request (and terms). But it is well worth a try. The idea is to salvage whatever possible from a no-go situation.
Meanwhile, everyone has been told to cancel their railway bookings immediately.

Karun Sharma:
* Better safe than never. Our family is able to take the correct action as they are not emotionally attached to mazaa, but to safety. I was told the snacks were in celebration of Shekhawat's 60th wedding anniversary. May he live long with love and togetherness.
* The calendar gifted by Milwani-ji was unique and said many things. He is an asset to Big Laaf. Banke Bihari Lal Ki Jai.

High Alert

Bijoy Gupta explains why he cannot go to Gir

The club continues to be on ‘high alert’ with news on the corona virus outbreak bombarding us through the morning. Mercifully, panic has not set in. But a slight sneeze within hearing range or even a muffled cough is enough to send alarm bells ringing.
News reports of an ‘elderly couple in Andheri’ testing positive has further exacerbated the situation. Their identities have not been disclosed officially, but many are claiming to know them. Laxmi Hadimani insists that they are

Santosh Tyagi

from Lokhandwala and went on to identify the building where they stay.
Fact or fiction, nobody can be sure; but rumours are also flying thick and fast. “Wherever I go, this is the only subject of discussion I hear,” said Rukhsana Khan. “You switch on the TV and the only news you get is of corona. Now they have got into our mobile phones also. You call any number and there will be a recorded voice giving you a lecture on corona virus!”
But then, everybody agrees that it is always better to be safe than sorry. As Nahid Khan put it: “I know one simple rule: I need to wash my hands with soap and water as often as possible. For me, nothing else matters. I do not have a TV at home to be disturbed. I don’t read the newspaper…”
But Bijoy Gupta is so overwhelmed by talk of the pandemic that he has developed cold feet on joining us for the Gir Forest trip (ref yesterday’s post). “Frankly, I am scared,” he admitted this morning. “Yesterday, my daughter-in-law called from London. She cautioned me on travelling to Gir. I did not have the courage to counter her.”
Meanwhile, Santosh Tyagi tried to make light of the situation by reverting to her practice of narrating jokes after the exercises. She read out a few gags from her mobile before her driver came to pick her up from the Garden. The fear of the virus continued to hang heavily upon us.

Falling Prey

Persuading Gupta (second from left) to join the Gir Forest trip

It was Bijoy Gupta’s turn to fall prey to the corona virus threat. He was supposed to leave for Calcutta tomorrow and his air tickets were booked a month in advance. Today he informed that he has cancelled the tickets.
Gupta’s plans for Calcutta had compelled us to exclude him from the Gir Forest trip (ref post of February 6) scheduled from March 18 to 22.

Banoo Apa (file photo)

Now, it turns out that his son in London has dissuaded him from taking the risk of flying to Calcutta, lest he'd contract the dreaded virus during travel.
“He is concerned because of my age,” reasoned Gupta. “I am 77 years now. The elderly are more vulnerable to a viral attack. In case I fall ill, he will have to take leave from his job and come here to look after me. I think that would be quite unfair on him.”
But that is not what the Club thinks. Gupta had only to say that he has cancelled his Calcutta trip when Yusuf Rassiwala, Nahid Khan, Bhaswati Bose and others pounced upon him, insisting that he better accompany them to Gir forest now.
“There are two drop-outs,” Yusuf R said. “You and your wife can take their place. The room is already booked. All you need to do is book your train tickets. Getting confirmed reservation is not a problem now because people are en masse cancelling their rail bookings.”
Gupta is not averse to the idea, but he needs to have a word with his wife, Pushpa. He said he knows of a railway booking agent who would do the needful and also took down details of the itinerary and costing from Bhaswati. He promised to confirm by tomorrow.
Meanwhile, Banoo Apa has reported sick. She is down with a ghastly rash of chicken pox and needs to remain indoors till such time the infection subsides. It so happens that she too has signed up for Gir forest. Let us hope and pray that she recovers fast and is able to join us on March 18.

Final Call

Santosh Tyagi is nowadays coming regularly after her knee operation. But she needs to keep both legs raised while exercising. 

After the Holi festivities, our trip to Gir Forest next week (ref post of February 6) has come under a cloud because of the corona virus scare. Two members of the group have suddenly opted out.

Meeting to decide on whether to proceed with the Gir forest trip   

A meeting was therefore called in the China Hut to check if other members held similar misgivings and also to take a final call on whether at all, to proceed with the trip.
This came in the backdrop of reports about travel plans getting randomly cancelled all around owing to last-minute drop outs and tour operators not taking chances in view of the risks involved.
What seemed to weigh heavily on our group though, was the damages to be incurred individually if the trip were to be called off. As Banoo Apa put it bluntly: “Since all of us have paid an advance (for accommodation and transport), we need

Naseem Khan brought us gajak today

to know how much of it will be refunded or whether we will have to forfeit everything.”
However, many

Bihari Milwani gifted Santosh a belated birthday memento

like Nahid Khan, Yusuf Rassiwala and Zarina Khan were determined to go on the trip, come what may. “Who knows if we will get another chance to go?” Naheed Siddiqui opined. “Since we have decided to go, we mustn’t back out now. The world has not come to a standstill because of corona virus. So why panic? We will take all precautions and proceed.”
Bhaswati Bose, who is coordinating the trip, informed that the special package deal available to us is valid only till March 31. “To postpone the trip to a later date will not only work out more costly but chances are, we’ll be caught in peak summer heat,” she explained. “Still, I’d check how much we stand to lose if, in a worst case scenario, the trip has to be postponed or cancelled.”
As of now, the trip is on.

Colourless Holi

For the first time in years, we celebrated Holi without colour. The corona virus outbreak had done us in (ref post of March 7). Let alone the revelry associated with the festival, there

Bihari Milwani (l) brought us ghewar. Shekhawat (back to camera) distributes

were barely half a dozen of us for the best part of the exercises today. It was only towards the end that Bihari Milwani joined us, followed by two ladies.
Milwani had brought us a box of ghewar, a traditional sweetmeat distributed on the occasion. That was all the ‘celebration’ we could have on the festival of colours this year.
Time was when Holi used to be celebrated on a grand scale with gay abandon as members, drunk on thandai (often spiked by bhang) plastered one another with colours, wet and dry. We even held a Mahamurkh Sammelan once and Bijoy Gupta was declared winner. Now, the fear of contracting the corona virus banished all such thoughts.
Nevertheless, we had our ways of deriving humour from the grim situation. On the talk of how the deadly virus could spread through currency notes, Gupta had a piece of advice for Shekhawat: “Better hand over all your money to me. Or else, put the notes in one place and set fire to them. The virus will die at once and you will be able to live in peace.”
But Shekhawat was worried for another reason. The exercises were getting over and not a single lady had come. “Have the ladies gone on strike?” he asked, repeatedly looking at the gate. Finally, Naseem Khan and Sayeeda Sayed showed up. Only then could he heave a sigh of relief!

Food Fiesta

Naheed Siddiqui (ext rt) serves tea after a round of date-biscuits and wafers

Call it a belated celebration of the International Women’s Day yesterday. Or an exercise in overeating ahead of the Holi festival tomorrow. Either way, it was a joyous spectacle of food, food and more food, even before the exercises began today.
Word had already got around about “free idlis being distributed at Garden No 4” since early morning. And much to our surprise, Naveen Bhai (a garden regular and friend of the club) deposited a big parcel of idlis – two-to-a-packet with chutney – on a bench close-by for us to be consumed after the exercises.
But Naheed Siddiqui intervened and started to distribute ‘date-biscuits’ brought from Saudi Arabia along with potato wafers, followed by hot, home-made tea. In between, Banoo Apa began serving an assortment of crispy bhajiyas and pakoras. And if these were not enough, there was Ashok Punjabi (another garden regular

Ashok Punjabi(l) gets ghewar for us

Banoo Apa(c) prepares plates of assorted fries

and well-wisher of the club) waiting in the China Hut with a box full of ghewar – a Holi speciality. Such was this problem of plenty for us that many like Shekhawat, Kiran Prakash and Qadeer Bano took the easy way out. They quietly slipped away without telling anyone.
But the more engaging part of the morning was Bijoy Gupta getting cornered by Zarina Khan. He had assured her on Saturday (see post) that he would bring a copy of the newspaper

Bijoy Gupta now targets Sayeeda Sayed(c) 

in which Zarina’s photograph presenting a bouquet to Johnny Lever was published.

Zareena Khan(r) warns Bijoy Gupta

Little knowing that Gupta was pulling a fast one, Zarina dutifully informed her people – not only at home but also in the U.S. and Qatar where her sons are based. “Just wait till they get to know how you have fooled their mother,” she threatened Gupta. “They are all 6 feet-plus. My youngest son is 6’3”. He will pick you by the scruff of your neck and simply toss you out!”
Rather than being cowed down, Gupta turned his attention towards Sayeeda Sayed and pulled another fast one: “Johnny Lever was very much impressed by you,” he said in all seriousness. “He asked your name and told me that if this beautiful girl comes every day, I will join the club.”
Gupta assured Sayeeda that he was not lying this time!

DAY 3067

Pic of the Week

AFTER THE SHOW, WHEN ALL IS DONE AND SAID...

They are discussing about joining the club and competing for the trophies next year. --Bihari Milwani

Corona Scare

Bijoy Gupta (l) insists having seen Zarina Khan's photo in Navbharat Times

The coronavirus outbreak has put the fear of the devil in many of us. Although no case of infection has yet been reported in the city, a decision was taken by the Club today not to celebrate Holi on March 10 this year.
This was in line with a string of government advisories to stay away from large gatherings and avoid inter-personal contact to the extent possible. Many entertainment shows and events as well as Holi celebrations have since been cancelled.
Already Shekhawat is seen sporting a white handkerchief tied loosely around his neck (which he slips up to his nose to serve as a face mask) by way of precaution. Also, we have stopped the practice of exchanging ‘high fives’ that marks the end of our daily exercises. We greet one another with a formal ‘namaste’ or ‘adaab’ instead.
In fact, the coronavirus scare has been hanging low as an ominous cloud, even threatening the awards function on March 5 (see post). Had our chief guest, Johnny Lever chosen to back out at the eleventh hour, all our plans and preparations would have come to a nought.

Nand Ram explains how he won three prizes

Banoo Apa treats us to hot home-made tea

That we got lucky would be an understatement. This explains why the awards function remains a dominant subject of conversation two days later – be it the multiple requests from all quarters to forward video clips of the hour-long programme, or Nahid Khan literally ‘blaming’ Nand Ram and Karun Sharma for bagging as many as three prizes each, or Bijoy Gupta claiming to have seen a photo in the papers of Zarina Khan presenting a bouquet to Johnny Lever … or Banoo Apa celebrating with a round of tea after the exercises this morning.
Gradually, it is getting to be business as usual.

Key Takeaways

Naveen-bhai (ext left) drops in to thank us for yesterday's programme

Now that the dust has settled over the awards function (ref yesterday’s post), there were some key takeaways for us. For starters, Johnny Lever has raised our stock in public perception, such that there has been a sudden surge in inquiries for joining the Club.
Bijoy Gupta and Shekhawat narrated how they were besieged in the Garden last evening with people congratulating them for staging such a “well-organised programme” and asking what it would take to be a member of Big Laaf.
Even today, there were

Fahmida Khan with her "Johnny
Bhai" posing with a Cup

a host of morning walkers – some known, many unknown – dropping by to say how much they enjoyed the programme. Razia Khan was also there with Tahira to inform that Johnny Lever was equally pleased by whatever we could do for him.
The presence of a celebrity chief guest in our midst also rubbed off on members as they changed the DP of their WhatsApp (framed with Johnny Lever) accounts overnight. His ever obliging and down-to-earth nature was

The smiles were still there on everybody's lips

an important lesson in humility for all of us.
Another major takeaway was the sense of pride and confidence that winning a prize had instilled in many. Qadeer Bano, Nand Ram, Naseem Khan, Geeta Latte, etc. were frank enough to confess that they had never received a trophy or medal in life– that too from a VIP. Yesterday was their first.
On a lighter note, Fahmida Khan managed to get hold of somebody’s trophy, just so she could pose as a winner with Johhny Lever for a photo. When asked why she had to do so, pat came the answer: “It was only a small cup. What was Yusuf-bhai doing with such a big trophy? He could have at least shared a part of it with me!”
Yusuf Rassiwala, recipient of the Outstanding Sporting Spirit award, had an announcement to make: that we have received a handsome donation from Celebration Club. He has collected the cheque. This was yet another important takeaway.
But to us, what mattered most were the moments: The first time in years we saw Qadeer Bano smiling. The way Banoo Apa tripped over herself on a joke, laughing and crying at the same time. Or Bhaswati Bose, unable to keep a straight face on stage while announcing the prize winners...
Indeed, with the Comedy King around, it was well-nigh impossible to keep a straight face.

Laughter Riot

Johnny Lever (far left) in full flow

The 'King of Comedy' makes his entry

Zarina Khan presents a bouquet

He came. He saw. And he conquered our hearts.
Giving away prizes to the winners of Sports Day (ref post of February 23) was incidental. It was done and dusted within minutes, the only significant detail

Shekhawat and Angad Singh drape
 a shawl around the chief guest 

being that Yusuf Rassiwala bagged this year’s 'Trophy

Yusuf Rassiwala receives trophy for outstanding sporting spirit

for Outstanding Sporting Spirit', the recognition Banoo Apa earned last year.
What followed thereafter was nothing short of a laughter riot. JOHNNY LEVER took centre-stage and true to his style and standing, regaled the audience to an hour-long battery of jokes that could well have raised the dead. He mimicked Dara Singh, Raaj Kumar, Ashok Kumar et al, went on to describe the peculiar quirks and kinks of Bengalis, spoke of what it takes to wake up early morning and leave home to exercise… and even postulated on the process that led to God creating Man. There was not a dull moment, as the pictures alongside amply testify.

Johnny Lever flanked by all prize winners for a photo-op

This man is simply unstoppable!

Angad Singh requests a mimicry item

Backstage preparations for snacks/ refreshments

The chief guest joins us for a quick bite 

Escaping from getting mobbed on his way out 

These kids, Mubaraka (l) and Jamila(r)
have even managed autographs

The most abiding image of a memorable morning

In all this, one person deserves special mention. She is “Razia Apa” to Johnny Lever, an elder sister. Were it not for her, none of what we enjoyed today would have been possible. Razia Khan opened the door to Johnny Lever, giving us the chance of a lifetime to experience what we cannot easily forget.
Banoo Apa also deserves special credit. Kudos to her for her backstage management, especially in organising the snacks and tea for members and their family and friends. No amount of praising and thanking her for what she does can ever be enough.

Karun Sharma:
Johny Lever is a natural comedy king. His ability to make people laugh was a test for the audience to resist laughing. I could not.

Geeta Latte:
First trophy ever won. And I received it from the most funny man of our country -- The Jhonny Lever. Big Laaf rocks!

Bhaswati Bose:
We never laughed so much as we did today morning. Thank you, Johnny Sir for giving us so much joy and happiness. You made our day!

Lt Col Angad Singh (rtd)
We do not need to take life very seriously. It was amply proved today that with all our worldly problems, we can still enjoy life. Everyone laughed to full capacity. Happiness was being shared instantly. Thank you, Big Laaf.