Anti-Climax

After an action-packed Saturday morning, today was an anti-climax. The Garden wore a deserted look with not even half of those who had attended the prize-giving and the joint birthday celebrations turning up this morning. Prime absentees included Srichand Arora, Geeta Sardana, Yusuf Rassiwala, Kishor Babani et al.
Still, Hari Singh Shekhawat managed to raise adrenalin levels by exhuming the Kashmir trip idea. He has a new proposal now that covers the touristy spots of Srinagar, Gulmarg, Pahalgam and Sonmarg over seven days with to-and-fro airfare, local transport for sight-seeing, food and lodging thrown in… all for an unbelievable Rs27,000 only.
It is no doubt a steal – even if the trip has to be pushed to September. But Mumtaz Jahan herself is not too happy about it, saying that she would have to be in Mumbai around that time. Others are raising health issues, possibility of accidents, the distance factor, emergency situations, etc. Razia Khan wants to travel by train. Many want to know what is wrong with a trip to some nearby hill-station like Matheran or Mahabaleshwar. A few are also saying that if we can wait till September, we might as well go on an overseas trip within the same budget.
The trouble is that nobody wants to make up his/her mind. And yet, everybody is eager to put spokes in the wheel. At this rate, no matter how much pain Shekhawat takes in making the Kashmir trip attractive, chances are it would be a non-starter. He must realise that it is impossible to please everybody every time.
Dilip Babani:
"We all should have a picnic in the train, Palace on Wheels, covering Rajasthan, Delhi and Punjab. It will be fun being treated like maharajas with nice non-veg food and hot drinks. Somebody told us that this is the most expensive trip. But all members have reached old age. They deserve maharaja treatment. Life meih ek bar maharaja hona chahiye. Hard earned money should be spend like this."
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
"Time for discussions, as always. So, as usual, announcement time!"

Day 636

Pic of the Week

READY FOR TAKEOFF... nine... eight... seven... six... five...

"Up, up and away, ready to spread my wings and fly away... Let's see if you can copy that!" --Renu Babani

"Welcome to HARISH AIRWAYS! Ladies and gentlemen, please fasten your seat belts for take-off to PATTAWAH. --Bhaswati Bose

"HARISH DADA! JA UD JA RE PANCHHI, KE AB YEH DESH HUA BEGANA!" --Kishor Babani

"Harish-bhai exercise ho rahi hai, ya dance? Waise dance bhi toh exercise hai. Keep it up. Angrahi toh mast leh rahe ho!" --Dilip Babani

"Uda... Uda... Mein kahaan uda ittefaq se?!? What a pic! As if I am about to take off to the skies with my fellow colleagues." --Harish Wadhwa

She IS Sunita!

The 'mystery lady' in last Sunday’s post was not Monthi Serrao. She was not Geeta Sardana either. Neither was she Kiran Arora, nor Nafisa Sayyad… But yes, Renu Babani had to get it right this time. The lady was none other than her good friend, SUNITA JAJODIA (below right)!
In fact, today was a day of double-celebration for Renu. Not only did she walk away with the Pehchan Kaun prize (left), she celebrated her birthday today in the Chinese Hut along with three other April-borns (below, left) – Hari Singh Shekhawat, Neelam Garg and Nahid Khan (from the yoga group).
What’s more, she had Prakash, her son (who has come over from Canada) by her side to share her happiness.
However, for the record, Renu was not alone at ‘recognizing’ Sunita from her wedding picture taken more than 30 years ago. There were six others who had also got it right: Srichand Arora, Geeta Sardana, Kajal Babani, Sushma Gupta, Harish Wadhwa and Neelam Garg. But in all fairness, the winner had to be decided by a draw of lots.
Some members appeared disappointed, claiming to have “worked really hard” at putting a name to the photo. Geeta looked particularly dejected, since she is an ace at identifying people and had won this competition twice in the past. Harish too had never got it wrong, thus giving rise to the joke that he’s really a cop in disguise – more appropriately, a detective. Nobody can fool his eyes. Ditto for Arora. The oddest part is that Renu, who has always been off-mark and could never get it right in the past, was miraculously spot-on this time.
With today’s results, the fifth edition of Pehchan Kaun comes to a close. We started with Yusuf Rassiwala on December 12, 2010 and since then Khatoon Baig, Srichand Arora, Santosh Tyagi and now, Sunita Jajodia have been featured. Let’s see who's next in line.
Harish Wadhwa:
It was a fun-filled morning for one and all. Gossips, quizzes, prizes, celebrations, birthdays, gifts, khana-peena, exercises, photo-shoots, jokes, satires, open interaction between Big Laaf and yoga members, young and middle aged, seniors and ultra seniors, pony-tailed Prakash blushing, some young and old people dressed neatly just for the occasion... all packed in a morning. Wow! Where else would you find such a group? Long live the members and the Club!
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
* "Yaay! I finally managed not only in succeeding in guessing the lady in the picture, but also getting the prize!"
* "Can you believe that young lady was me..."
* "Celebration time for the four of us!"
Bhaswati Bose:
CONGRATULATIONS Renu! And many happy returns of the day. This must have been your best birthday in some time!!!

Prime Suspects

Speculation is rife on the identity of the lady featured in last Sunday’s post of Pehchan Kaun. Anxiety to unravel the mystery has reached feverish pitch, such that nobody quite remembered it was Hari Singh Shekhawat’s birthday today – except for Srichand Arora. Taking the cue from him, one by one everybody wished Shekhawat (right pic) and then clapped and sang in his honour.
Initially, Sunita Jajodia (below) was beieved to be the ‘mystery lady’ of the b&w picture with almost every second member convinced about her identity. But in two days, the needle of suspicion swung inexplicably, pointing at Geeta Sardana (below).
By the end of the week, Monthi Serrao (bottom, left) emerged as a strong possibility with an overwhelming majority picking on her. At present, they make for the three key suspects in this guessing game while a couple of others like Kiran Arora and Nafisa Sayyad are the also-rans.
Unlike earlier rounds of Pehchan Kaun, this time we did not disclose the many names put forward in the course of the week -- lest anyone got influenced. We noticed also that quite often, some members did not take kindly to being identified with a photograph of someone "not so good looking". However, this did not prevent the persistent buzz over the past week with some like Monthi suddenly raising their voice in exasperation, “No, it is not me!”
Ramila Mistry was rebuffed twice (“Kya dekh rahi tu?”) when she tried doing some intense face-reading, first with Sunita and then, Geeta. Geeta herself was heard tactfully grilling Nafisa on whether she was always slim, even in her younger days… before ending in a quandary over choosing between Sunita and Kiran Arora. However, it has to be said that nobody takes this game as seriously as Geeta. Having been a winner twice in the past, this time she had a printout of the photograph with her and was seen quietly comparing it with all the female faces around. But then, this was only to confirm the suspicion that she was trying to deflect attention away from her.
Anyway, by tomorrow morning we should know. Don't be surprised if one of these 'suspects' turns out to be the winner. The prize distribution is being combined with the joint birthday celebration of three April-borns – Shekhawat, Renu Babani and Neelam Garg. A lady from the Yoga Group is also likely to join. So make sure, you check the blog tomorrow.

Rate Structure

The monetization process was pushed a notch ahead today with Yusuf Rassiwala (right) and other members of the Managing Committee formally approving a structured ‘rate card’ for generating ad revenue. In a note circulated among the five office bearers, Srichand Arora (below pic) had proposed what he described as “differential pricing” for soliciting ads. Essentially, it suggests that advertisers should henceforth be billed according to their scale of operations, rather than be lumped together by a common rate structure.
The rate card distinguishes between ‘small businesses’, ‘medium-scale enterprises’ and ‘corporates’ with separate rates prescribed for each category -- ranging from Rs2,000 to Rs20,000 per month (for the minimum saleable space). Block bookings for the year (or half-year) would be encouraged by way of offering attractive discounts, with added incentives as ‘agency commission’. For instance, any member getting a corporate booking for a year (valued at Rs200,000), would stand to gain Rs40,000 at one stroke (on a 20% commission). And that, for the minimum allotted space of dimensions of the ‘dummy ad’ appearing on the top right corner of this page. Non-members will get a 10% commission.
On a lighter note, Arora took everyone by surprise by suddenly complaining that we were too quiet for his comfort during the exercises. “This place resembles a cattle pound,” he pointed out, instantly sending Rassiwala into spells of laughter. Nafisa Sayed seized the opportunity to accuse Arora for being the one to “impose curfew” and that it is “out of fear we do not open our mouths” in his presence. “But why bother about an old man like me?” Arora responded sportingly. “Just listen from one ear and take it out from the other!” Obviously, Dilip Babani’s comments the day-before (see post of April 24) have had an effect.
Srichand Arora:
Blog Monster, I would appreciate if this comment is published: Dear members and friends, though I am given so much importance and credit, let me tell you that this credit and importance goes to our dear Mr Bose and Mr Harish who are working behind the curtain and allowing me to fetch the credit to myself. We must appreciate the help provided by these two GENTLEMEN.
Dilip Babani:
Arora-ji, you are 1000% correct. Bose and Harish are as indispensible in our club as you are. They help a lot. Neki kae darya meih dal.

Kashmir Kaput

What began with a bang, ended in a whimper this morning. Plans for the Kashmir trip were given a quiet burial with Hari Singh Shekhawat today declaring that not a single member has yet paid the token sum of Rs10,000 to confirm his/her participation.
“Doesn’t look like anybody is interested,” he concluded. “The idea was to set out before the monsoon. Now where is the time to collect the money, pay the security deposit, complete all formalities and apply for a railway coach? The monsoon is due in the first week of June and the Railways require clear 30 days to confirm our booking. Not possible!”
At least nobody can now blame Shekhawat for abruptly calling off the trip, since he had all along, for the past one week, been reminding people to make up their minds. Mumtaz Jahan had been equally insistent, coming every day and briefing us (see previous posts). Significantly, she did not show up this morning.
Meanwhile, the Babanis – Renu and Kishor – returned from their Shirdi trip and as always, distributed prasad from the Sai Baba temple. Funnily, this time many members insisted on picking out the soft reodis, at the exclusion of all else. Maybe it had something to do with difficulty in chewing the hard stuff. But it was quite amusing to watch Harish Wadhwa helping out with the ‘draw of lots’, vigorously shaking the prasad container and everyone else waiting to pounce on the reodis. Here, Ramila Mistry appears to have got lucky.
Indeed, people can be ruthlessly selective, even with so-called 'divine food'!
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
"Oh My God! What are they searching for? Trust me, there is no hidden treasure."
Harish Wadhwa:
There were none left as most of them were already cherry-picked. We were only trying to hunt for the accidental leftovers and ended up finding just two, which were quickly pounced upon by Ramila-ji. Renu-ji watched all this in amusement not knowing how to react to all this. Hey, by the way those revadis were superb.

Wander Lust

This ‘Kashmir trip’ is now getting on our nerves. Everybody knows this isn’t happening and yet, we seem to be going on and on about it every morning. Even Shekhawat knows it is impossible to muster the 42 members necessary to fill a railway coach (yesterday's post). Besides there are expenses involved, not everybody can afford. And the distance. Many members are saying that while they are willing to go, their family will not permit them. To go on such a long journey, they say, is too much of a risk… lest something untoward happens.
One thing is however, clear. Our members have been bitten by the travel bug, right and proper. They are even prepared to go on a day trip to Royal Garden Resort ("so what if we’ve already been there several times?") as long as it offers a break from their daily chores. If Kishor Babani was here (too bad he’s away with family at Shirdi), he’d have suggested Wagah Border and everyone would have jumped at it. Somebody suggested the Kerala backwaters and Monthi Serrao said it can happen only next year. But that sounds too, too far away in the distant future. They all want a trip now, as in yesterday.
On his part, Srichand Arora came up with the Mahabaleshwar idea. Instantly everyone was game, even as it would have to be an overnight stay over the week-end – starting out on a Friday night and returning on Sunday evening. Barring two or three members, nobody seems to have gone to Mahabaleshwar – not even Shekhawat. The odd part is that barely one year back, the same Mahabaleswar idea fell through because no one was prepared to spend a night there. Today, that is not an issue at all. After three nights at Goa last month, they have all become bold and daring. They have tasted blood!
Harish Wadhwa:
The good part is that people have some nice topics to discuss, which can bring them closer as a family. Isn't it nice that they are all talking more with each passing day?
Dilip Babani:
Harish-bhai you are right. This is because our secretary now has become very, very, very good to everybody. Now he is very-very-very-very soft spoken. Before he was strict and disciplined. Now he is our hero in Big Laaf. Every member respects and loves him!

Cold Feet

It’s a typical case of Introduction being bigger than the book. The gossip session preceding the exercises tends to overstretch to such an extent that the actual exercises have to be rushed through. Yusuf Rassiwala today declined to conduct the exercises saying that he would only delay things further. Likewise, Srichand Arora was reluctant, as he would be unable to make up for the lost time. Ultimately, Sitaram Hivarkar had to conduct the exercises – in pin-drop silence and without a moment to waste.
The reason for the delay this morning was the seemingly unending debate on whether or not to go ahead with the Kashmir trip. Apparently, most members have developed cold feet over the week-end, despite Hari Singh Shekhawat’s assurance on booking a special AC two-tier coach on the Jammu Tawi Express. But he would require 42 passengers to fill the coach and barring Rassiwala and Razia Khan, nobody looks inclined.
To confound matters, Mumtaz Jahan informed that costs in Srinagar could increase since her tour operator has come up with a revised package for 10 days, instead of seven. The new estimate of Rs24,000 all-told (inclusive of rail fare) was found to be exorbitant, if not unaffordable. Nevertheless, on Rassiwala’s suggestion, Shekhawat would start collecting cash from tomorrow so as to get an idea on how many are willing to go on the trip -- tentatively fixed for June 1 to 13, 2012. Time is running out if the special coach has to be booked.

Day 629

Pehchan Kaun?

Can you put a name to this face? Look closely… Yes, we all know her. But she is not who you think. So don’t jump to conclusions. You have a full week (but one chance) to identify this senior member. Results will be declared on April 28, 2012 (Saturday).

* "GEETA-ji kya baat hai, bahut masoom lag rahi hai aap!" --Dilip Babani
* "She is none other than SUNITA-ji!" -- Srichand Arora
*"SUNITA-madam hai yeh!" --Kajal Babani
* "She is SUNITA-ji" --Sushma Gupta
* "Looks like SUNITA JAJODIA in her younger days" --Harish Wadhwa
* "This is MRS MONTHI" --Santosh Tyagi
* "I think she is MONTHI" --Razia Khan
* "She has to be GEETA SARDANA!" --Ramila Mistry
* "SUNITA-ji, I think." --Renu Babani
* "She is MRS KIRAN ARORA-ji" --Monthi Serrao
* "I think she is SUNITA JAJODIA." --Neelam Garg
Other names received verbally are:
* MONTHI SERRAO --Ved Prakash Grover
* MONTHI SERRAO --Hari Singh Shekhawat
* MONTHI SERRAO --Sunita Jajodia
* SUNITA JAJODIA --Geeta Sardana
* MONTHI SERRAO --Khatoon Baig
* NAFISA SAYYAD --Yusuf Rassiwala
Well, the lady in question is indeed SUNITA JAJODIA (above, left)-- as she is today. Thank you, everybody, for your participation.

--Big Laaf,

April 28, 2012 

So Far So Good

Mumtaz Jahan is determined to take us all to Srinagar – her hometown in Kashmir. Hari Singh Shekhawat is equally firm in his determination on making the trip in June. Together they have convinced the naysayers to join, despite apprehensions of inclement weather, health issues, accidents and the attendant risks of undertaking such a long journey.
As things stand, till July, there are no tickets available on the Jammu Tawi Express, the only train service, once a week – every Saturday. One viable alternative is to book an entire coach for ourselves to and fro, for which we would need to rustle up at least 40 (or is it 30?) passengers for the trip. Shekhawat feels that should not be a problem.
Meanwhile, Mumtaz informed about two tour packages – one, priced at Rs15,000 and the other, slightly high-ended for Rs21,000 per head. This would take care of food and lodging, local travel, sightseeing and houseboat rides over eight days. The main scenic spots of Srinagar, Sonmarg, Pahalgam and Gulmarg would be covered during this period.
So far so good. Now the only point where the plans can come unstuck is if the Railways refuse to allot us an exclusive coach. Shekhawat promises to make enquiries.
Harish Wadhwa:
* 'Chalo Kashmir', ab hamara yeh naara hai! I am tempted to visit the Crown of India and Paradise on Earth, as they say. Let's see how it progresses. I am actually looking for the company of a good- looking chudail from outside (to make this trip memorable) before taking the plunge. How about a Kashmiri chudail?
* Nice words in Guru Gyan, Kishor-da!
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Chudail Chasing

Harish Wadhwa (below, left) is nurturing a new hobby. This morning, on the way to the Garden, he got lured by what Shekhawat was to deduce a chudail – a shapely apparition that takes the form of a beautiful maiden. This one was in mini skirt and tight top. He gave her a good chase, but failed to get anywhere close. After nearly an hour, he realized he had bypassed the Garden and was in the middle of nowhere. He had lost his way!
With some difficulty, Harish managed to retrace his steps and could somehow make it to the Garden gate, just in time when the group was to disperse. The incident brought a sense of déjà vu to Shekhawat, who stood at a distance, listening in silence. The moment Harish finished, he muttered something to himself and rushed back into the safety of the Garden!
The chudail experience deprived Harish the pleasure of witnessing the example he had set of being a murga. Geeta Sardana emulated his act of sitting on the haunches with arms under her knees and holding her ears – all because she reported late for the exercises. But she was quick to get back at Razia Khan, today's ring masterni.
“Ab chuja (chicken) ban ke dikha,” she challenged her.
“I am already a chuja,” Razia retorted amidst rousing laughter.
But there was serious business transacted as well. Srichand Arora, who had returned from Lonavala with a bagful of ckikki boxes (lead pic), handed over cheques to Monthi Serrao for three ads appearing in the side panel. With these payments, revenue from the ads has just about crossed Rs15k.
Mumtaz Jahan (right) also showed up this morning, mainly to revive interest in the Kashmir programme. Arora declared pointblank that he would not pay 45k for the trip. Mumtaz agreed that it was an exorbitant sum and suggested taking the Jammu Tawi Express (instead of flying) for a fare of Rs1,200 approx -- with an added 50 per cent discount for senior citizens.
As for stay, Mumtaz recommended a B&B (bed and breakfast) arrangement in family cottages, instead of going for hotel accommodation. This way, costs could be cut to under-10k per head – of course, subject to the duration of stay. Her suggestions met with unanimous approval.
Harish Wadhwa:
I wish I could have outrun the chudail and befriended her... but for my bad luck. Still looking for one, hee hee! Well, I was surprised as to how Shekhawat-ji/ Bose came up with the chudail story since I had gone to Lokhandwala for some personal work this morning. It was entertaining though and they were successful in pulling my leg. I don't mind skipping the Garden exercises and chase chudails, effectively landing up doing brisk walk exercises.

Happy Day

The day began on a happy note with Sunita Jajodia (left) popping up unexpectedly, just before the exercises. But more than being taken by surprise, we were relieved to see her -- looking hale and hearty. She said she had dropped by just to say “hullo” as she knew we were all worried for her.
Sunita has been suffering from a hitherto undiagnosed infection which had taken a severe toll on her health. No line of treatment worked on her. Now she is being administered an intravenous injection every day for which she needs to be admitted to an ICU for three to four hours. Six injections are through and four more are to go. Luckily, this has worked out well and Sunita says she feels “much better” now.
One other reason for Sunita dropping by was to wish her close friend, Renu Babani a happy birthday. The latter did not celebrate today as an elderly relative has been hospitalized in a critical state. The Babanis (right) were nevertheless present in full strength and joined us in wishing Renu many happy returns of the day. We raised the customary ‘extra laugh’ and clapped and sang for her.
Yet another happy diversion was the entertainment provided by a stand-up comedian who strayed into our midst during the exercises. He called himself “Gabbar Uncle” (left), as opposed to the Gabbar Singh (from the film, Sholay) known to terrorize people. “I try to make people laugh instead,” said the sprightly young man, as he went on to perform a series of filmy skits with dramatic flourish.
Everyone marveled at this gifted artiste and applauded him on every act. Harish Wadhwa (who understands theatre) was mighty impressed and gave him an encouraging pat on the back. Somebody gave him a hundred-rupee note as a token of appreciation. But Yusuf Rassiwala felt sorry for him. “Such phenomenal talent could die unsung” he observed. “This boy is surviving on the pious hope that one day he will get recognition.”
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
* "I am back with a bang and nothing can stop me from returning to the Garden."
* "We are family and stand as one."
* "I am far better than any actor and shall prove it!"
[P.S.: Thanks everyone, for your birthday wishes. Meant a lot.]
Harish Wadhwa:
* Happy Birthday Renu-ji on your 18th Birthday. Well, you still are 18 for Kishor-da at least -- and 21 for us!
* Stand-up comedy is no easy job and requires guts to stand in front of a live crowd and perform. Certainly my appreciation for this talent. It is different that such people find recognition after a lot of struggle and grind. Do you observe the sparkle and enthusiasm in his eyes? May God bless him with success too.
Srichand Arora:
* Renu/ Kishor, really very sorry to hear about your samdhan-ji. May God take her in His arms and have her to rest in heaven.
* Renu dear, a belated Happy Birthday and many, many happy returns of the day.

Beat the Heat

Last heard, Sunita Jajodia was terribly ill at home. Santosh Tyagi too shall have to remain home-bound, for her grandchild. Bapu Rane is still counting mangoes in Ratnagiri. Hem Chand Jain has simply disappeared. Prakash Motwani too is absconding. Nahid Khan is away in Lucknow. Harbans Singh is in Ludhiana. Tara Chand Seth is attending weddings in Delhi. Ramila Mistry has taken off for Rajkot. Srichand Arora has escaped to Lonavala...
Given this scenario, it is hardly surprising that attendance should drop drastically at the Garden. Personal predilection apart, the sweltering Mumbai heat has been a huge deterrent factor, forcing many to give the morning exercises a go by. But then, as you lose some and gain some, there are many new faces (often, rank strangers) also showing up every day. Besides, old prodigals like Hari Naraiyani, Sandhya Narang and Nafisa Sayyad have started coming.
Meanwhile, Hari Singh Shekhawat finds himself in a fix on the Kashmir trip (yesterday's post). With no one yet in any mood to go, he conceded that 45K could be an “unaffordable” sum. But before calling off the trip, he would like to see whether Mumtaz Jahan can offer a "good bargain", especially on boarding and lodging at Srinagar. He would also like some clarity on the possibilities of train travel, failing which he suggested we settle for a day trip to Royal Garden Resort (once again) to beat the summer heat.
There was also some talk of visiting the hill-stations down South. Monthi Serrao offered to check on some muth (ashram) accommodation in Mangalore, from where we could perhaps move on to Munnar or Kumaragom in Kerala. Some even suggested the cooler climes of Mahabaleshwar as a weekend getaway. But all that would depend upon how Kashmir eventually pans out.

Kashmir Calling

The Kashmir story took wing today with Hari Singh Shekhawat (left) announcing that the trip, planned for mid-June, would cost us about Rs45,500 per head. This includes air fare to-and-fro (Rs28,000 approx.), hotel stay for seven nights, road transport for sight-seeing as well as meals three times a day (all inclusive).
Reading from a tourist brochure, Shekhawat informed that the trip would cover all the scenic spots of Srinagar, Sonmarg, Pahalgam and Gulmarg. A one-hour shikara (houseboat) ride on Dal Lake is also part of the programme. A representative of the tour operator would “meet and assist” the group, but not be responsible for the personal expenses of members -- travel insurance, entrance fees at monuments and museums, medical emergency, tips, phone calls, laundry, etc. These would have to be borne individually by members.
Since many found the costs to be quite steep, suggestions were made to take the Rajdhani Express to Delhi or perhaps, even train it up to Jammu, from where other options could be explored. Shekhawat argued that this would deprive us of the benefits of a “package deal” offered by the tour operator -- apart from the fact that a rail/ road journey could be physically taxing on some of us. He was however open to the idea of going along with any other operator who might offer a “better deal”. He also added that since seats were limited and time was running out for the tours beginning mid-June, we should have our money ready by next Monday, i.e. April 23.
Much as this provided food for thought, the mood was generally upbeat with Dilip Babani, once again, taking to the middle for the two laughter sesions. Usually, the run-up to any picnic or excursion generates a good deal of excitement all around. This charming picture of Prakash Babani and Rehana Sheikh (above) captures the spirit of joie de vivre that consumed everyone at the Garden this morning.

Next Big Thing

Now that the monetization process is complete and the Club is more or less on an even keel, attention has shifted to the ‘next big thing’. Mumtaz Jahan (in pic) brought up the subject of a trip to Kashmir, for which she volunteered to make necessary arrangements, courtesy her political connections with the NCP in the Valley. She suggested that in order to avail of the best off-season tourist deals (in hotel bookings, transport, sightseeing, etc.) we ought to ideally make it there before June 12.
Hari Singh Shekhawat informed Mumtaz that we would prefer to travel one way by train and most likely, return by air. Although no numbers were mentioned, he seemed to be counting on as many people who had gone to Goa last month with comparable costs of boarding and lodging. On her part, Mumtaz assured that she should be able to swing huge discounts on hotel bookings for the group.
There were also murmurs of an overseas trip – perhaps Bangkok – which might work out to be more cost effective. But Srichand Arora was of the opinion that a holiday in Kashmir cannot be compared to that of Bangkok, or any other place. Besides there are issues of applying for travel documents. Many members, including Shekhawat, do not even have passports.
Let us see how this plays out.
Harish Wadhwa:
* The ads have come out very nice. Crisp, creative and apt words. Good work again. You can also open an ad agency with such good drafting capability.
* Tourism within India must be promoted more than visits abroad! More manageable and easy.
* By the way, our associate blog Ganju-Panju will soon complete its centenary posting on 19-04-2012. Kishor-da keep going. Very well done.

Day 622

Pic of the Week

Omigawd! What did they do to deserve this?

* "HUM KO RANA-JI MAAF KARNA, GALTI MAARE SE HO GAYI..." --Kishor Babani

* "We are ready to accept our fault. See, we'll do anything to make up!" --Renu Babani

* "Sorry, we will not talk during the exercise." --Dilip Babani

* "What a great achievement that our blog has crossed the magic number of 100,000 hits. Great work done. Amazing! Just too impressed by the daily coverage." --Harish Wadhwa

* "You mean because the blog has crossed 100,000 hits, they are holding their ears? Punishment for an achievement??? --Bhaswati Bose

* "Bhaswati-ji, aaj ke baad kabhi blog aur blog walon ke khilaaf nahi bolenge. Yeh toh din par din nayee bulandiyan chhoo raha hai." --Harish Wadhwa

Baisakhi’s Here

So is “Prakasho Babiani”, from Canada. Kishor and Renu Babani’s Latino-looking son arrived in Mumbai last night and in a determined bid to abuse his body out of its 22-hour jet lag, showed up at the Garden and even took part in the exercises. What’s more, he did the ‘donkey dance’ with Hari Singh Shekhawat (below left) and later, joined the Badmash Company for the tea session (lead pic).
Prakash has been an old friend of the Club and is as much adored by all as the rest of the Babanis. The only problem with this young man is that he is training to be a shrink in Ottawa (he should be in the movies), which gives many members a complex in his presence. They may not admit it but we all know that in six years, by the time he completes his internship, we would all be ripe and ready to land on his couch. Let us hope he does not decide to set up practice here in Mumbai. We are just fine the way we are and don't want to be 'cured' of our cranky madcap ways.
On a more serious note though, Prakash’s visit is well-timed with the Baisakhi celebrations today (and his mom’s birthday coming up next week). A major shindig is being raised at the Garden across the street this evening, replete with songs and dances and eats. While this is being hosted by the local Punjabi association, elsewhere in the city other communities are celebrating the New Year (by the Hindu calendar) in different ways – Poila Baisakh (Bengali), Rongali Bihu (Assamese), Vishu (Malayalee), Puthandu (Tamil), Vishuve Sankranti (Oriya)… Call it whatever you like, but here’s wishing that everybody has a ball for the next 12 months. (After that, don’t ask!)
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
* "We know to get people to join us. And we have always proved it... Cheers!"
* "A little to the left, then to the right, a hop, skip and 1...2...3."

Reason to Rejoice

As life in the Club gets into an overdrive, Razia Khan (right) produced a little surprise by distributing toffees and lozenges after the exercises. With ads coming in, bank account opened and cheques being deposited, the mood had to be upbeat. So why not rejoice with sweets?
Whatever be the real reason for Razia to celebrate, we would like to believe what she said: “This is for the monetization of our blog!” After all, so much has happened in the space of one month after the managing committee took charge on March 17. The Club will not be the same again.
But some things don’t change. Yusuf Rassiwala cannot stop himself from taking playful digs at Srichand Arora, to the extent of threatening him with a big stick today before the exercises began. Arora will always be the voice of authority for the Club, even if he were to scare away ladies trying to pluck mangoes in the Garden, as it happened this morning. And Geeta Sardana will never exercise in silence, just as Bhaswati Bose is incapable of keeping her mouth shut for more than 60 seconds and Kiran Sajjan would always be turning up late…
But then, it is from these little quirks and kinks that our Club derives its character.
Harish Wadhwa:
* Thanks to Razia-ji for the chocolates. But she gave me only one-two, while others got a handful. Bahut be-insaafi hai yeh! Iski saza milegi, zaroor milegi...
* Greetings to one and all for Baisakhi! And Vishu (14-04) to all Tamilians!!!
Dilip Babani:
All members have worked together for the success of Big Laaf. We are a family. Some members are active and some simply follow them. We thank both. By the grace of God, we will get success. Sky is not the limit.
Srichand Arora:
Hi, you all! Today the number of views has crossed six digits. CONGRATULATIONS. Thank you everybody for making Big Laaf such a success.

First Advertisement

Arun Patil (left) today kickstarted the Club's space-selling campaign by handing over a cheque for an advertistement of his company, SPECIAL EFFECTS UNLIMITED. The 4 col cm display is for an initial period of three months and would start appearing from Baisakhi day, i.e. April 14 (Saturday).
Arun’s company offers specialized expertise to filmmakers, events organizers, corporates and wedding planners on a whole range of visual and sound effects – from fireworks display, explosions and smoke flash to generating cobwebs, fog, rain, ice frost and duststorm to making miniatures and dummies and staging cannon blasts, bullet hits, fights with knives, bows and arrows.
With over 30 years experience in the field (including an extended stint in Hollywood), Arun is recognized as a wizard at his craft, having pulled off some mindboggling tricks in films like Attenborough’s Gandhi and Shekhar Kapur’s Mr India and Bandit Queen – long before computer graphics or CGs entered the scene.
The other big prospect this morning was Srichand Arora bringing in two advertisements – one, of a sports goods firm and another, of a dealer in spectacles and eye wear. Hem Chand Jain has also promised an ad of his company, while his friend, Vinod Sehgal (right) is offering an insertion for his silk mills. While these are all positive signs, Big Laaf would like to clarify that there is NO compulsion on anyone to advertise on this blog. We do not want donation or charity. Only if it serves a perceived purpose in terms of mileage, visibility, etc. should anyone advertise here.
The ladies however, are already getting restless and eager to outdo the men at pulling in ads. Some are even looking at the 20% commission (10% + 10%) as extra pin money -- just that only kela wallahs, milkman, drycleaner and the household bai fall within their sphere of influence. But do not be surprised if you suddenly spot an ad of ripe, yellow bananas or red tomatoes on the side panel… or perhaps, Anna on a bicycle, advertising fresh, hot idli-sambaar!
Harish Wadhwa:
* With the count already at 99,823 on April 13, I am sure we will hit the magical number of one lakh hits by Sunday. Wow! We will also give value to the ads being brought in by some members. Good work.
* We shouldn't be surprised if we get a matrimonial ad too... from a bride or groom looking for a prospective mate or companion. Why not? Khushiyan hi zindagi mein sab kuchh nahin hai!
Srichand Arora:
Hi you all! Have you marked that our blog views will be reaching SIX figures in the next one or two days? Thanks a lot, dearest Blog Monster!! And CONGRATULATIONS in advance!!! We pray to God that your growth be faster then our blog.

'Fat Brother'

It was Ramila Mistry’s day today. For long she has been a subject of great wonder for the way she juggles her prayer beads with chatting up everyone in the Garden, laughing and trading jokes. Ram Shankar Shukla, for one, admits to being in “perpetual amazement” every time he sees her with the rosary and multi-tasking (lead pic) in such manner.
Today, as ‘teacher’ conducting the exercises, Ramila got an opportunity to pull everyone up and she started with the men – Srichand Arora. She addressed him pointedly as “Mota Bhai”, something he is not too comfortable about (even though he is aware that this is an honorary greeting among Gujaratis, reserved for elders.)
Arora tried to ignore Ramila initially, but when she persisted with “Mota Bhai” a couple of times, he walked up to her and demanded an explanation. Her reply was predictable, leaving him doubly foxed. “First you call me ‘fat man’, then you called me an ‘old man’!” he exclaimed. “Why pick on me? Don’t you see any other mota bhai here?”
Pratap Bhatt, a co-Gujarati (and also an elder) was watching the fun from a distance with an amused look. The moment he saw Arora deflecting attention away, he knew he would be next. He took to his heels and reached the public toilet at the far end of the Garden, even before Ramila could think of calling out, “Mota Bhai”!
But then, to her credit, Ramila conducted the exercises in pin drop silence – barring occasional titters from the Geeta Sardana-Bhaswati Bose-Santosh Tyagi trio. Their logic was that the 'teacher' should not interfere when they talk, just as they don't interfere in her job. Geeta went one step further, challenging Ramila to see her after the class. “If she still does not sudhro (improve) herself, we will see her out of the school… outside the Gate!” she threatened.
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
* "I am full of life and wish everyone could be as happy."
* The Three Muskeeters!

Inside Info

If Lokhandwala is seen as a microcosm of Mumbai city, the Garden should well epitomise the media industry. Let alone gossip and scandal, you’d also find hard news breaking here – political scoops, corporate leaks, murder, inside trading information, product launches… Long before the papers can even get a whiff of the story, it would have been discussed and analysed threadbare on the sidelines of the exercises.
Take the case of the Arun Tikku murder at Lokhandwala, currently hogging headlines. The papers and TV got cracking on the story just yesterday (Monday), but Santosh Tyagi (below, left) had already got the news on Saturday itself when she found cops swarming her building compound. She happens to reside in Samarth Aangan complex where the murder took place.
Obviously (as any news reporter would say) being at the right place at the right time has its advantages. But not for Ved Prakash Grover (right). A quiet and peaceful person, he has often to answer peculiar questions in the Garden on (of all the people), Rakhi Sawant – simply because she is his neighbour in Serenity Complex. The 'drama queen' is a known publicity monger and poor Grover has to explain to us her actions, as though he is responsible for her.
But then, many of our members have also learnt when to open their mouths and when to shut up. For instance, when film actor Shiney Ahuja was caught with his pants down some time back, those who stay in the vicinity (Tarapore Towers) maintained a dignified silence. Once the heat was off, they all started coming out with “inside information”, one more colorful than the other, on whether the man was guilty of raping his maid. Clearly, they understand that timing also matters.

Rare Chivalry

In a rare display of chivalry, the men in the group today switched places with the women, thus braving the sun and presenting the latter with the ‘luxury’ of exercising in the shade of the trees. Hari Singh Shekhawat said something about Vitamin D and the benefits of exposure to the early morning sun. Srichand Arora was more gallant. “All our lives we have endured hardships,” he said. “This too we will take in our stride so that our ladies are comfortable!”
Many ladies appreciated this fine gentlemanly gesture. Some even sympathized with the men as they got baked in the harsh sunshine – little realizing that nobody was doing anybody a favour. The men had conveniently vacated their places, primarily to save themselves from the droppings of crows nesting in the branches above. Now, it would be for the women to deal with this menace.
However, the big plus of the day was the huge turnout (well crossing the 30 mark) which is rather unusual for a Monday morning. As in the good old days, women outnumbered the men, leading to a lot of cross talk, mischievous jibes and loads of laughter. But oddly enough, the women appeared somewhat restrained today while the men, in their new position facing the blazing sun, were a restless and noisy lot.
Razia Khan, who was conducting the exercises, got so fed up by their behaviour that she actually asked Shekhawat and Yusuf Rassiwala to shut up – only to be told that they cannot help it. “Jagah ka asar hai!” they retorted shamelessly. In this atmosphere of madcap bonhomie, Monthi Serrao (above) gave away 'Easter Chocolates', leaving everyone with the feeling of a morning doubly well spent.

Day 615

Pic of the Week

-- a special watercolor work to celebrate the Easter spirit.

"This is no doubt a priceless photo and no words can describe the beauty of it!" --Renu Babani

"Happy Easter to Monthi, little Tian and all others of the family." --Bhaswati Bose

"Thank you for your wishes and blessings for Tian." --Monthi Serrao

"Monthi-ji, such a lovely and beautiful picture! You must copy and enlarge, then frame it. It will be a surprise for dear Tian when he grows into his teens." --Srichand Arora

Dummy Ads

Having now set its house in order, the Club entered the all-important phase of revenue generation this morning. The ‘dummy ads’ inserted in the side panel were explained to all present, the idea being to elicit everyone’s support and participation at building a common kitty for the larger good of all members. Yusuf Rassiwala (vice-chairman) was identified for administering and overseeing this crucial activity – of course, in close coordination with other members of the managing committee.
Essentially, the ‘dummy ads’ are just indicative of the space available and positioning of various insertions, potential advertisers who may be approached, the kind of revenue that can be expected from the products and services advertised, etc. It was also explained that nothing is fixed or final as every ad is open to negotiation as to its size, positioning and rates, since the blog has the inbuilt flexibility to accommodate all ads. However, we must try to avoid entertaining anything controversial or valued at less than Rs1,000 per insertion. Ideally we should aim at package deals for a year and an incentive of 10% would be given to whoever brings in ads. Yusuf Rassiwala (left) will have the final say in these matters.
Meanwhile, Neelam Garg ushered in her birthday (lead pic) with a box of chocolates – amidst much merriment, singing and the customary extra laugh after the exercises. She looked extra cheerful this morning. We join her in the celebration and wish her every happiness, good health, peace and contentment all her life. Happy Birthday, once again, Neelam Garg!
Dilip Babani:
Happy Birthday to Neelam-ji. God bless you. Choclate toh banta hai.

Damage Control

After yesterday’s brouhaha, peace and tranquility descended on the Garden. The club’s biggies had swung into action last evening (see final comment on yesterday’s post) and the results were there for all to see today. Still, by way of abundant caution, those intrepid firefighters had gathered in full strength (including Razia Khan and Yusuf Rassiwala) in case a need arose for further damage control. Even Kajal Babani and Kiran Sajjan were present, not wanting to take chances!
But there was really no need to be on high alert. Kishor Babani had already set the mood early morning by offering to go online and book one-way tickets on Make My Trip.Com for those who cared to pay a visit to the good god above. Srichand Arora too regaled everybody, at one point rebutting a pointed joke on his receding hairline as a sign of old age. “C’mon, I have seen many babies born, completely bald!” he quipped.
Even Ram Shankar Shukla and Ved Prakash Grover were at their ebullient best, repeatedly cutting in with one-liners and wisecracks. And by the time Hari Singh Shekhawat walked in jauntily, sporting that trademark smile, the past had been conclusively buried in all-consuming bouts of laughter and merriment.
The only bother was Hari Naraiyani (left), who had rejoined yesterday after his 21-day pilgrimage to Beas (near Amritsar). For an 83-year-old, he had been maintaining himself well. But now, for once, he looked dangerously frail and his voice has turned very feeble. Yesterday Kishor had to interrupt him in his exercises and make him rest on a bench with a bottle of water. Today Hari-bhai came to the Garden, but excused himself from the start. We just hope it is nothing more than fatigue and the oppressive morning heat that is telling on him. He surely needs some rest.
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
* "Follow me and I shall show you the way to a beautiful path!"
* "I am so tired and weak. Hope I can regain my stamina soon."
Srichand Arora:
* OUR DEAR HARI-BHAI IS STRONG ENOUGH. I'M SURE HE WILL GET BACK HIS STRENGTH SOON.
* Hi! Did you all mark that by the end of next week, we will cross 1,00,000 views? We deserve two extra, very loud laughs at that time. So please be ready and clear your chests...
Kishor Babani:
PEACE PREVAILS, THANKS TO OUR SENIORS FOR RESTORING NORMALCY.
Harish Wadhwa:
* Laughs se kaam nahin chalega, Arora-ji. Fafda-jalebi mangta hai. Bahut samay se nahin hua. 100,000 hits is no small achievement and we need to celebrate the hard work of all members, including the Guru Gyan of Kishor-da, Picspeak from Renu-ji, the harqats, pranks and blabber-blabber of the newsmakers, the sharing of memorable pictures for Pehchan Kaun, etc.
* Nice to see some dummy ads flashing on the side panel. This will surely send a signal to potential advertisers. Please also give one email id and phone number on the first ad: "Contact Mr... on phone... for ads in these spaces".
Srichand Arora adds:
Harish-bhai, my promise for fafda-jalebi stands, the day viewer hits touch six figure. On the first dummy ad, contact numbers are given. You just get us an ad from your company -- even on a discounted price and with commission of 10%... jalebi-fafda toh kahin gaya nahin naa!

This Too Shall Pass

Our chairman, Hari Singh Shekhawat does not know to fight. He flares up easily, gets emotional and willy nilly plays into the hands of the opposition. This is exactly what happened in the morning when a group of belligerent ladies, spearheaded by Geeta Sardana, Bhaswati Bose and Ramila Mistry, levelled charges of rigging in the April 2 voting (see post). Ideally he should have turned a deaf ear. At best, he could have silenced all argument by telling the ladies to respect the majority verdict. Period.
Instead, in all his simplicity and straight-forwardness, he turned defensive and engaged the ladies in an endless diatribe (lead pic) over the rights and wrongs of the issue, thereby giving them additional ammunition to corner him further. Things were bound to reach flash point. Shekhawat lost his temper and walked away in a huff, threatening to resign.
All this while, Srichand Arora (left) stood his ground, cool as a cucumber. Fully composed, he tried to make sense of the cause of agitation while reasoning with all that dissent is always welcome in a democratic set-up. He had almost won everybody’s confidence when from nowhere, Shekhawat showed up again and started another round of emotional slugfest. By then, silent observers like Pratap Bhatt and Ram Shankar Shukla felt fortified enough to also raise their voices and add fuel to fire.
An issue, which could well have been nipped in the bud, was thus blown out of proportion today. Sitaram Hivarkar (right) tried to drive a compromise by suggesting a “three month period of observation” – effectively indicating that a daily attendance register be maintained and for absenting members, look-out notices be posted! The suggestion miraculously found favour with all present, despite the impracticality of it all.
Well, this too shall pass.
Ramila Mistry:
I favour Sitaram-ji's suggestion. I am sure Arora-ji will help to take proper decision and find a solution. The Club members are both men and women. They should give respect to each other. Now that the Club is registered, its name should not be spoiled. Be careful.
Harish Wadhwa:
Temperature was soaring this morning and was felt by all observers and Garden folk -- which could have been avoided. While the Managing Committee was fair in its approach, intent and action, the objections must have come as a surprise. Come on, this is a simple issue and could have been resolved easily by a simple dialogue.
Bhaswati Bose:
The charges levelled against the Managing Committee are genuine. The last few days there was a lot of discontent amongst us. Only a gutsy lady like Geeta-ji could bring up the issue in front of everybody. Others joined in the protest after that. Yes, our Chairman did lose his temper and how! But all credit to our Secretary who not only patiently and politely heard our grievances, but also promised to make amends. I think Sitaram-ji’s suggestion is sensible and just and can surely be implemented. All said and done, today’s agitation was a revelation:
1. It revealed Arora-ji as the right person for the highly responsible job he holds.
2. It revealed the hidden side of some members who reacted like wounded tigers.
3. It revealed a sense of belonging amongst all the members who protested, argued, quarreled, fought or threatened to resign. The Club does matter to us!
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
* "What is going on here? Why doesn't anyone understand me? I give up!!!"
* "We need to arrive at a solution right away before any further issues."
* "Everyone has a right of speech. So let's give all a chance!"
Kishor Babani:
Neutral. No comments.
Geeta Sardana:
Sitaram-ji has given a good suggestion. Arora-ji's response was good. We should be careful that such things do not happen in future.
Monthi Serrao:
Rules and regulations should be followed to avoid problems and misunderstanding in future. Sitaram-ji's suggestion can be considered.
Srichand Arora:
* After long discussions between Managing Committee members (except Ms Monthi, who is busy with some religious functions), Shri Shekahwat admitted his mistake for being loud. I feel if someone admits a mistake, it is our duty and binding to forgive and forget. Hence, we decided no more fuss on this issue and no sorry or thank you to anyone by anyone. Cheer up all and join us for the morning laughter and exercise. We all agree that whatever happened was not good. But after all, we are a family and such things happen. Be assured it will not be repeated hereafter.
* Dear friends, no more comments on this issue. Thanks!

Logical End

Monthi Serrao can get some sleep today. She was made treasurer of the Club on March 17 (see post) and since then, she has been caught in a maddening whirl of number crunching, banking formalities, keeping count of cash collections, ensuring documentation is done, and so on. The exercise has finally reached its logical conclusion.
This morning, soon after the exercises, Monthi announced (right) that an account has been opened yesterday at Canara Bank in the name of the Club with herself, the secretary (Srichand Arora) and chairman (Hari Singh Shekhawat) as the authorized signatories. It is a ‘savings account’ and a deposit of Rs11,000-odd has been made from the cash collected so far. The contribution of four members, who are presently out-of-town, would be added later to the seed money.
With the opening of this account, the ambiguity over whether the Club would be saddled with a non-interest earning ‘current account’ has been settled for good. It also resolves the confusion over having to go in for registration as a pre-requisite for opening a bank account. However, for all matters of financial management and propriety, the buck stops with our treasurer.
Monthi of course, enjoys the confidence of the members in general and managing committee in particular, without whose support and cooperation this exercise could not have been completed. Shekhawat already had a running account with Canara Bank and his personal equation with the branch manager has greatly facilitated matters. Arora, on his part, had been toiling day and night and his contribution at bringing things to this head can never be quantified nor compensated. Yusuf Rassiwala (vice chairman) too has been just as forthcoming, both as troubleshooter and enabler – not to mention Razia Khan (joint secretary), who was seen, even this morning, diligently collecting signatures (left) for getting her paperwork in order. To all of them, the leading sentinels of Big Laaf, we bow our heads in salutation and gratitude.
Harish Wadhwa:
Now it is the turn of Gupta-ji to help us take this account further. Blog Monster, can you put up boxes on the side panel of the page, indicating the space available for ads? Not to forget that we are heading steadily to reach the magic number of 100,000 hits... Wow! This shows how keen and interested people are.
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
* "Excuse me, please may I say something at this point?"
* "What sort of a document is this? And why is it so important?"