‘Obama of Garden’

Barack Obama

The Club was today witness to a bizarre spectacle with Bijoy Kumar Gupta charging Shekhawat of being the “Obama of the Garden” and demanded that he relinquish the position forthwith. “Even Obama cannot rule for 15 years the way you are doing,” Gupta exclaimed in all seriousness. “I am willing to pay one lakh rupees upfront if you vacate your position for me!”
Completely stumped for words, Shekhawat promptly gathered a crowd around to hear what Gupta was saying. “Why one lakh rupees, I am prepared to pay ten lakh rupees if Shekhawat quits his kursi,” Gupta continued. “I shall make phone calls to everybody, take you all on long-long picnics, even take you on a world tour. I will do whatever you say, just get rid of this man. He has become Obama of this place.”
“Don’t pay ten lakh, one lakh will do,” Shekhawat interrupted.

Bijoy Gupta stakes his claim

“Bring the money tomorrow and I shall leave the day-after. That’s a promise.”
“You mean you are making a donation to the Club?” Harbans Kaur wanted a clarification.
“Call it whatever you want so long as I get to replace Shekhawat,” Gupta insisted.
“But you will have to stand for election,” Bhaswati Bose reminded him.
“Then I won’t win,” Gupta conceded matter-of-factly. “I know nobody will vote for me. Why else am I paying so much money? I can already see so much mayoosi on everybody’s faces here!”
But Shekhawat was not willing to let go. “First get the money and then we shall see,” he prodded Gupta.
“No-no-no this won’t do… I need some guarantee. Otherwise you people will take my money and not elect me and I shall be neither here nor there. That’s not fair.”
Nobody knows if Gupta is really serious. For this is the second time he is staking his claim for being the Club's bossman. The last time he even demanded that he be garlanded with honour, be photographed and written about in the blog, etc. In return, he would throw a lavish party for all, he promised.
Harish Wadhwa:
I am sure no one will have any objection if the club gets one lakh (if not 10) by making Gupta-ji the Obama of Big Laaf! Why not give him the opportunity to 'serve' us and test his claims?

Pall of Gloom

Madan Mohan Pushkarna is no more. A pall of gloom descended on the Club as Shekhawat broke the news this morning after the exercises. He had heard of it yesterday at a get-together of senior citizens in the adjacent Garden No 2. The cause of death is however, yet to be ascertained. But it is generally presumed that he had succumbed to age-related complications.
Better known as “Prabhu-ji”, Pushkarna was one of the founding fathers of the Club and had always been held in high regard, much as he stopped coming for the exercises for several years. Srichand Arora, Nahid Khan, Yusuf Rassiwala and other biggies who conduct the free-hand exercises are said be Pushkarna's proteges.
According to Shekhawat, the man was living by himself, almost as a recluse even when he was keeping indifferent health over the past few months. He resisted all help, however well-intended, from friends and well-wishers. But once in a while he used to drop by in the Garden for a stroll and to exchange pleasantries with old timers.
Monthi Serrao remembered him to be a headstrong person and a strict disciplinarian. Nahid Khan recalled that he was a hard task master, but meant well for everyone. Sitaram Hivarkar agreed with her, pointing out that he was much misunderstood – to the extent, he had become quite unpopular with some members.
Significantly, a majority of the current crop of members do not remember having ever seen or met him. But they all know that the exercise regimen we follow so religiously to this day was originally conceived by Prabhu-ji more than a decade ago. Nothing has changed since. And that is the lasting legacy he has left behind for Big Laaf. May his soul rest in peace.
Jagmohan Papneja:
I am sorry about the sad demise of Pushkarna-ji, the founder of our club. May his soul rest in eternal peace. For him one can say: "As a well-spent day of laughter brings happy sleep, so also a disciplined life brings a happy end"

Day 1419

Pic of the Week

PUSSY CAT IS NOT AMUSED!

She’s an Actress

Geeta Sardana

Whoever imagined that Geeta Sardana is a theatre actress of no mean caliber? Little known to us, she had been quietly rehearsing all these days for the lead role (female) in a play being staged by ISKCON, Juhu. And this morning, much to our surprise, she called at the Garden to extend an open invitation to all for a show at the temple auditorium at 3:00 pm tomorrow.
The name of the play has been deliberately kept secret. Nor has she revealed the character or role she would be playing. Clearly, she wants to keep it all in suspense so that everyone would throng ISKCON theatre in huge numbers out of curiosity. But being a highly imaginative group, there has been intense speculation (from the time her call came) on what the lady is up to.
Is she playing Radha from some episode of Krishna Leela? After all, it is an ISKCON play and the Radha-Krishna myth is an abiding staple for the religious organisation.

All ears on Santosh Tyagi

But given her age, can Geeta be playing a young Radha? If she is, would there be a comparably old Krishna? Is it conceivable to have a ‘superannuated’ Radha-Krishna romance? Or maybe, Geeta isn’t even playing Radha in the first place. She would appropriately fit Radha’s mother’s role. Who is Radha’s mother, does anybody know? Or is it Krishna’s mother Geeta is enacting?
Nobody had any answer to any of these questions. But with imagination running wild, the hilarity accompanying such idle speculation was a fitting wrap-up to an unusually happy, if busy week. The picnic hangover from last Saturday, mosquito menace, confusion over veg and non-veg food and so on were to also find echo in Santosh Tyagi’s jokes this morning. In fact, her narrations are increasingly assuming philosophical overtones with deep insights into human values, common fallacies, gender relations and many such existential problems.

Mall Picnic?

Dilip Babani proposes a picnic to Infiniti Mall-2

Within days of the Juhu picnic (ref post of September 21) Dilip Babani has come up with a novel proposal: Why not set out on an excursion to a city mall and spend an entire day traversing its interiors in air-conditioned comfort, having lunch in a food court and perhaps even take in a movie before leaving?
The idea apparently struck him on a recent visit to Infiniti Mall-2 in Malad. “It is a huge five-storey complex that would take about two to three hours to cover end-to-end,” he narrated this morning. “If you are not up to purchasing anything, just go around window-shopping. When you are tired, hop into any of the food courts or cafeteria for refreshments. You can have lunch there also. On the top floor, they have a recreation area with different games and joy rides. You can also catch a movie at the Cinemax theatre there. These are all housed under one roof.”
It goes to Dilip’s credit that he is able to think out-of-the-box and throw up exciting options for outings rather than follow the tried and tested path of frequenting popular picnic spots, water parks and holiday resorts that have been done to death.

Razia Khan warns Srichand Arora

He is the one who came up with the idea of a trip to the zoo and not so long ago, had led us to an incredibly enjoyable and memorable picnic at Chhota Kashmir (ref post of February 14) in Aarey Colony, Goregaon.
Much as everyone was kicked by Dilip’s idea of the ‘mall picnic’, Shekhawat requested to keep all plans in abeyance till he returns from his vacation to Rajasthan on October 17. He will be leaving for his village on October 4.
Meanwhile, Srichand Arora today confirmed what Sunita Jajodia had always been complaining about (ref post of September 24). There are indeed deadly mosquitos lying in wait in the grass where we exercise and they made life so miserable for Arora this morning that he had to abandon the exercises and beat a hasty retreat half way through. Razia Khan however, caught up with him at the Gate (where he was sitting merrily scratching his exposed legs) and issued a warning, upbraiding him for acting irresponsibly.

An Update

Srichand Arora narrates his experience at the commissioner's office

Srichand Arora today gave an update on the status of our application pending with the Charity Commissioner for registration of the Club. He informed that in response to a summons, he, along with the other three badmashes of Badmaash Company landed at the commissioner’s office near Worli Naka the day before yesterday, only to find the big man gone. He had been summoned in turn to attend an ‘election duty’ meeting, thus leaving Arora and his sidekicks high and dry.
Since then Arora has been on a merry-go-round hobnobbing with junior officials, getting our papers in order, signing and countersigning wherever asked… “You people have only to see that office,” he narrated. “It is worse than any government office you could have ever seen. Forget air conditioning, there is just one fan in a hall and that too, placed above the babu so that the rest of us can die in the heat. There is a huge mela of people out there but nobody knows anything about what is going on!”

Nahid Khan

Monthi Serrao

Nevertheless, Arora is optimistic that the job will be done in a week. “I would like to believe that the elephant has got through and only its tail remains,” he explained. “And after it is done, we will have a grand party…” Before he could finish, Razia Khan intervened: “No, we will all give you a grand party.”
Meanwhile, the mystery around the disappearance of Monthi Serrao and Nahid Khan has been deepening with every passing day. Neither of them are the kind to stay away from the Garden for any length of time without intimation. And now, both are not even responding to phone calls.
Shekhawat, who claims to know everything about everyone, says that Nahid is not in Mumbai. And about Monthi, he does not know. Bhaswati Bose says she is suffering from cough and cold while Harbans Kaur says that she is busy with guests at home and could have even gone with them out of station. Nobody knows for sure.

Comeuppance

Sunita Jajodia

Sunita Jajodia had it coming. For far too long she had been bamboozling her way into getting things on her own terms regardless of majority opinion or established norms of the Club. But this morning, the ploy boomeranged horribly as she refused to exercise on grass and insisted on sticking to the concrete area outside the China Hut. Her excuse: There were live mosquitos hiding in the grass waiting to attack her with dengooooo!
Arun Patil helpfully pointed out that there were scores of people out there on the benches and they looked perfectly safe and sound. But Sunita Jajodia was adamant: “If you there, I shall go home!”
This time Shekhawat (otherwise a supporter of Sunita) took offence: “What does she mean by threatening to go home? Does she come here for our sake or to exercise?”
Still, to keep peace, he returned to the concrete area and the rest of us followed quietly. Suddenly out of nowhere, Razia Khan came thundering in with some others: “We were all waiting there (on the grass patch) and you have started exercising here. The least you could have done was to inform us.”
"This is utter nonsense,” muttered Ram Shankar Shukla.

Khatoon Baig brought samosas and chocolates

“One day you are here, the next day you are there. Why don't you people make up your minds?”
When they were told that Sunita was scared of mosquitos in the grass, they got all the more agitated. “To please one person, you cannot keep changing things,” Razia protested.
A rumble ran through the group over Sunita’s habit of objecting to whatever we did in the Club. Nothing ever got her approval. Sadly, Sunita found herself isolated. Nobody, not even her close friend Santosh Tyagi took her side. “Go ahead and exercise in the grass, but I will go home,” she threatened once again.
This was the limit. Sunita had to be told that she better not threaten us again because she wasn’t doing us a favour by exercising in the Garden. If anybody stood to gain, it was she herself.
However, all this was forgotten the moment Khatoon Baig appeared at the Gate. She was back from the United States of America, her first trip abroad and she had spent two enjoyable months with her folks in Las Vegas, San Diego and parts of Texas. Apart from chocolates, she carried a box of crispy hot samosas to mark her return. Welcome back, Khatoon-ji!
Srichand Arora:
Welcome back, Teacher-ji! We all at Big Laaf were missing you a lot. Thanks for such crispy hot samosas. I was really surprised and very impressed to see you with the Club cap which you remembered even after two months. Amazing!

Search Mission

Search continues for the dial top of Razia's watch

The other day Bhaswati Bose lost her solitaire in the tall grass of the Garden and miraculously, found it two days later. Before that, Monthi Serrao discovered a ‘gold’ chain close to where we exercise, but it turned out to be fake. Today, Razia Khan lost the dial top of her beautiful Swiss watch and got everyone rummaging through the grass after the exercises.
It was like searching for the proverbial needle in a haystack. Razia had been all over the place today as she conducted the free-hand exercises. Moreover, nobody had any clue what the missing object looked like. Obviously, it was quite expensive because Razia did not want to give up the search even as one by one, everybody was losing hope. Harbans Kaur suggested localizing the search to where Razia stood during the Laughter Rounds because chances were she had clapped so hard that the dial top simply flew off her wrist.
Even there, we drew a blank. Srichand Arora felt so sorry for Razia that he offered to buy her a replacement for the watch – more so because he had scolded her rudely for interrupting the exercises and intently looking about in the grass.

Razia returns Arora's wallet

Sushma Gupta treats us to barfi

Razia insisted the dial top was irreplaceable and priceless. Arora was to console her later by offering his wallet, saying she could buy a new watch with whatever money she found in it. There was Rs2,500-odd inside and Razia promptly returned the wallet.
A playful gesture like this not only lightens the atmosphere but also reduces the sense of loss for the moment. But more than that, what we got to realize today was that like Razia’s dial top, there could be many more lost valuables lying around, hidden in the Garden which their owners have given up on. Today itself, while on our search mission, we discovered a beautiful faux gold bracelet, but badly caked in mud, lying half-buried in the ground. It is just possible that there could also be some genuine gold ornaments and gems for the picking in the Garden – should someone seriously care to look around.

Veg or Non-Veg?

Santosh Tyagi takes Mallika Kagzi to task

The Saturday picnic madness (see post) spilled into this morning with three crazy lines of conversation dominating today's proceedings: One, why did Srichand Arora, Shekhawat and other club biggies abruptly abandon the picnic after the exercises? Two, where did all those who went on their own to Juhu Beach disappear? And three, did Santosh Tyagi really consume non-veg without her knowledge?
On the first count, Arora’s explanation was that he was already running late since he had an appointment to keep at 7:30 a.m. He had merely given Jagmohan Papneja and Ved Prakash Grover a lift home while Shekhawat confessed to a desperate need to do ‘soo-soo’. And Bihari Milwani had to report for work.
On the second count, those who could not fit into the cars (or otherwise turned up late) insisted they had followed us to Juhu Beach and then lost us. In other words, we had given them the slip and they spent the morning searching for us in vain.

Fehmida Khan explains

Only Fehmida Khan was honest enough to admit that she had met a long-lost college friend on the beach and the reunion was more important to her than searching for us.
The third and most critical issue was Santosh Tyagi’s conversion to a carnivore because she actually “liked the taste” of whatever Mallika Kagzi gave her. The latter had only to say that it was keema-pao and Santosh instantly saw red! She refused to believe that anybody could defile her being with ungodly food – turning her into a sinner for straying away from the vegetarian path. The more Mallika reminded her that she had sounded everyone about keema being a pure non-veg dish, the more Santosh got upset. Amid rousing laughter she charged towards Mallika, almost beating her up. Mallika retaliated by threatening (or was it a promise?) to give Santosh “bade ka paya” (buffalo femur soup) next time.
Santosh did not have the stomach to hear any more of it and walked away in a huff.

Day 1412

Pic of the Week

MASTI BY THE BEACH

Jagmohan Papneja:
A team plays with 11 players, including the goalie. But here the goalie has left the rest of the 10 players high and dry. Can you name the goalkeeper?

Laaf by the Sea

VERY GOOD, VERY GOOD, HEY!!!

At 7:00 a.m. sharp, four cars left the Garden gate and in less than 15 minutes, deposited its' 20-odd passengers on Juhu Beach. The weather was pleasant – dark and cloudy, but quite breezy and more importantly, the sea was in high tide.

Exercises in progress

The waves rolled onto the shore, stopping short of the circle we had formed for our exercises this morning.
“Wah!” Sitaram Hivarkar exclaimed.

Salutations to the sea

“How often do you get to enjoy such wonderful weather? We are so close to home and never before has it struck us to come here in the morning. We must come here more often.”
Indeed, this was a world by itself with beautiful young men and women (some with handsome dogs) jogging and walking past, skirting around and giving us the thumbs up in acknowledgment of our presence.

All fun and games...

An elderly couple (obviously foreigners) stood by watching us as we went through the regular drill of laughter and free-hand exercises. A young lady in leotards half-way joined us, but was dissuaded by her companion.

Lavish breakfast spread

Soon another woman, amused by what we were doing, interrupted her walk, clicked photographs on her mobile and sped away.
Srichand Arora conducted the exercises, but could not stay long as he was committed elsewhere. That was when the picnic baskets were opened, courtesy Mallika Kagzi and Razia Khan – ladles of lip-smacking keema with different types of bread, two varieties of veg noodles, packets and packets of biscuits, hot tea, fresh fruits, cold drinks… properly served in paper plates and cups with paper napkins and hand sanitizer. What more could we have asked for?

Mallika Kagzi is helped out of water

Santosh Tyagi and Nahid Khan

Building sand-castles?

Thanksgiving, for a morning well spent

And then the fun began. Santosh Tyagi announced she’d be getting in the water. “What is the point of coming to Juhu Beach if I don’t wet my feet?” she reasoned.One by one, all the ladies followed and the “wetting of feet” turned into an orgy of tomfoolery and madness out in the sea – the ladies gamboling raucously like kids what with Bhanu Appa singing her lungs out, Santosh breaking into smart Michael Jackson moves, Bhaswati and Razia screaming and shouting while wave after wave lashed at them till suddenly Mallika, unable to hold herself, collapsed in a heap in the water. Luckily, no damage was done, except for a few bruised egos.A beach bum, standing at a distance, advised the ladies: “Amma log, you were not supposed to have gone out there!”
Jagmohan Papneja:
The visit to Juhu beach was a great experience. I hope this the start of many more such visits in future.

Grim Shadow

Exercises continue amid uncertainties 

Shekhawat is in two minds on tomorrow's picnic

The weather gods have cast a huge shadow on our Juhu picnic tomorrow (ref yesterday’s post). Suddenly, for no reason, the skies were overcast this morning and we had to exercise close to the China Hut amid a steady drizzle. Many regulars, including Srichand Arora, Monthi Serrao and Santosh Tyagi did not show up, obviously fearing the worst.
Luckily, we were spared a cloudburst and managed to complete the exercises without event. But a niggling concern remained uppermost in our minds: What if the bad weather persists till tomorrow? Will it be feasible to set out on a picnic in these conditions? Rather, would it be advisable. While Shekhawat, Razia Khan and a few others declared that come what may, we must go on the picnic tomorrow, many were not too sure.
“Even if nobody goes, I shall go,” Razia said valiantly. “Anyone wanting to join me is welcome. If not, it is still fine by me. From Monday I would be away in Pune. This will be my last chance to enjoy Mumbai's departing monsoon.”
“Should I get breakfast?” inquired Mallika Kagzi. “Believe me, it is absolutely no problem organising breakfast for everyone. It will be enjoyable having something to munch on by the sea after the exercises. After all, what is a picnic if there is nothing to eat?”
Shekhawat was caught between the devil and the Arabian Sea. On the one hand, he had realized that the timing was all wrong for the picnic and that chances were it could rain whales and sharks on Juhu Beach tomorrow morning. On the other hand, he could not overlook the enthusiasm of some members, knowing that cancelling the trip at this juncture would be a bigger dampener than any thundershower.
Finally he took a call: “We will all assemble in the Garden as usual at 7:00 a.m. tomorrow. If it rains, we shall drop the picnic idea. If the weather is fine, we will pile into cars and the rest of us will take autorickshaws. All depends on the weather tomorrow morning.”
Srichand Arora:
I may not be joining Juhu picnic and / or laughter in the Garden due to some domestic work. Sorry.
Jagmohan Papneja:
Juhu beach is most famous for its street food and local elegance. They offer excellent meal and snack items. The question is whether anything will be available to eat in early morning.

Interim Picnic

Monthi Serrao excuses herself due to prior commitments  

Shekhawat has finally succumbed to mounting pressure in the Club on taking a picnic out locally. The last outing was seven months back (Kerala) and the next one is scheduled seven months hence (to Darjeeling). Besides, it has been ages since he had taken us out somewhere in the city. So upon the insistence of some seniors this morning, he agreed to an outing at Juhu Beach on September 20, i.e. Saturday.
“We shall set out at 7:00 a.m. in whatever transport available and do laughing on Juhu Beach,” he announced. “Four or five cars should take care of all of us to and fro. If not, some of us will have to take autorickshaws. For a change we’d do our exercises by the sea and after that, we will have breakfast nearby if possible. Or else, we’d come straight back.”
The impromptu programme took many by surprise, but nobody resisted. Monthi Serrao however, had some reservations as she is already committed elsewhere on Saturday.

Yusuf Rassiwala takes guard for today's exercises

Moreover, she would much rather connect with her friends at the Juhu Laughter Club in advance so that they could host us for the morning. Three years back we had played hosts when they visited us in the Garden.
But then, as many were to say, that can always be kept for the future should we be invited and it is better we do not impose ourselves on them. For the present, we are merely seeking a change of venue for our routine exercises and in that sense this will not be a picnic proper. “The more we keep planning and mobilizing people, the bigger the chances of things fizzling out,” Shekhawat noted.
Monthi agreed with this logic and gracefully urged that on her account the picnic should not be postponed or cancelled. Sunita Jajodia however, got into a minor altercation with Shekhawat when she too wanted to excuse herself because of some shraadh in her house this Saturday. Shekhawat just refuses to believe that anybody can ever have shraadh when he organizes a picnic!
Jagmohan Papneja:
So far our exercises were limited to the Garden where 80% of the area is covered by grass. But during the monsoon, we moved to a hard place near the temporary shed to protect ourselves from rain. It has been a different kind of experience. Now a new idea has emerged from Shekhawat-ji to hold a laughter session at Juhu Beach. The beach is a great place for exercising. Enjoy the fresh air, the sounds of the ocean, the sand under your feet... It is an altogether new experience. Thanks to Shekhawat-ji for initiating this idea. Change is always for the better.

In Agony

Sandhya Narang

Sandhya Narang is in pain. She is bed-ridden with multiple fractures, having broken her hip bone and shoulder blade in a freak accident at home. She had to be admitted to the Brahma Kumari hospital (near Andheri Station) in a precarious state and after a month, was discharged recently. According to her friend Vandana Kankanwar, she is out of danger now.
Sandhya happens to be one of our more senior and much adored members, but has always maintained a low profile because of her painfully shy and diffident nature. After the untimely demise of her husband four years back (ref post of September 20, 2010), she had turned even more reclusive and irregular for the exercises.

Lt Col (retd) Harvinder Jauhar

It is a shame we did not notice her absence for the past two months or make any inquiries.
Turns out Sandhya was playing with her dogs (she has two of them) at home when she slipped and fell awkwardly on the floor injuring her hip. She lay immobile groaning in pain, giving the dogs the impression that her falling down with a thud was also part of the fun and games. Playfully the bigger dog jumped on her body, cracking her shoulder instantly. The lady was in no state to defend herself.
Although it would be unfair to disturb Sandhya now as she recuperates, we would, through this blog, convey our concern and wish her a speedy recovery. We know it is agonizing for her to perform routine activities and even stretching out to answer the phone can be excruciatingly agonising. But to her son and daughter at home, we can only say that if there is some way we can be of any use, they must not hesitate to get in touch.
Meanwhile, for the record, Harvinder Jauhar has had to say goodbye to the Club for now as he leaves for his hometown, Meerut today. He isn’t sure when he would return. We wish him also the very best and look forward to his early return.

Back to Place

Inertia comes with age. And sticking to the status quo speaks of multiple insecurities. But for us, to resist leaving the concrete area outside the China Hut (now that the rains are over) and return to a grass surface for the exercises had nothing to do with a fear of the unknown. It had more to do with the fear of keedas.
So today, many put their foot down when Srichand Arora, Shekhawat and other ‘youngsters’ led us to our old stomping ground in the middle of the Garden. The monsoon had left our patch lush green, the grass glistening in the early morning sunshine and it was more airy out there than where we had been exercising till yesterday. But Sunita Jajodia, Mallika Kagzi and a few other ladies refused to budge out of the China Hut. Ved Prakash Grover shuffled across to hang out with his friends, much to Shekhawat’s amusement. Only after we were half-way through the laughter round, did they trickle in one by one.
But their protests did not end there. They found the grass too damp for comfort. The ground was too soggy, they complained. Some looked for booby traps in the form of potholes and jutting stones meant to “disbalance” them. Bhaswati Bose stood apart to exercise, imagining there were snakes and scorpions hiding in the grass. Monthi Serrao was at her wits' end searching for the creepy-crawlies and could not understand why most of the “ghaas-phoos wallahs” (read vegetarians) were afraid of the grass. “No, not the grass,” Kajal Babani exclaimed. “It’s what lies hidden in the grass…” Such was the prevailing paranoia that left to themselves they would have even seen ghosts hanging from every tree in the Garden.
Somehow they survived the morning and also said a thanksgiving prayer in the end. But tomorrow, we shan’t be surprised if some of them come marching in wearing gumboots and helmets… just in case.
Jagmohan Papneja:
We may not admit it, but we are all plagued with fearful tendencies. Due to this reason some of the members did hesitate to go back to the former place for laughter yoga. How can we convince them that there is no need to worry about unknown fear?

In the News

Shooting in progress...

Instead of following news, we seem to more often 'be the news' these days. Or else, why should anybody be interested in filming us as we exercise? It happened a fortnight back (ref post of August 26). And today again, we found ourselves facing another camera.
However, unlike the earlier film unit which had come with regular equipment and crew, today’s was an unfussy one-man affair with a handycam and no frills. The cameraman observed us from a distance, took positions to pan his camera and just once, while we were on the laughter round, did he step inside the circle and take close-ups of our faces. Even before we were finished, he was gone out of the gate. Why he had come, who sent him, what he would do with the footage… we have no clue. We did not ask and he did not tell.
But the best news of the morning was the return of Prakash Motwani. He was making an appearance after what seemed like ages, looking all primed up and radiating a rare glow from his face.

Prakash Motwani

The Boses share a birthday prank!

Jagmohan Papneja was so happy upon seeing his friend back hale and hearty that he promptly christened him ‘Reconditioned Motwani’. As the latter was to say, the Mumbai weather had done him in (aggravating his wheezing problem) and now that the monsoon has receded, he feels better. Just as long as it does not rain, he would be regular for the exercises in future. Or so he has promised.
It was also Bose Babu’s birthday today. Apart from the routine ‘fourth laughter’ and singing ‘Happy Birthday’ in chorus (which have become more of a formality), there were some touching moments like Shekhawat hugging him affectionately, Santosh Tyagi placing her hand on his head and blessing him, Bihari Milwani presenting him with three freshly plucked hibiscus from his house first thing in the morning…
Moments like these reinforce our bonding as one large, happy family.
Harish Wadhwa:
That's a lovely pic of the two in PDA and romancing with a prank. Luddoo is only an excuse. But did he give in meekly by lowering his hand or did she jump to grab her share? If it was the latter, it must have been a scene to watch. By the way, a very Happy Birthday to our dear Bose-Babu. I mean it and am not saying it for the lovely besan-ke-laddoo he got for us. God bless him with a lot of prosperity and good health and the company of many badmaashes.
Jagmohan Papneja:
On your birthday, Bose Babu, may your special day be surrounded by happiness, filled with laughter, wrapped in pleasure, brightened with fun, blessed by love, remembered with joy and enriched with hopes. Happy Birthday, dear Bose. God bless.
Srichand Arora:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY AND MANY, MANY HAPPY RETURNS OF THE DAY, DEAR DEREK. I MISSED THE CELEBRATION, BUT NEVER MIND. I AM SURE IF NOT TODAY, THEN TOMORROW OR THE DAY AFTER, I AM GOING TO GET MY SHARE OF LUDDOOS. JUST NOTE I AM NOT DIABETIC!!!

Day 1405

Pic of the Week

ONCE A SOLDIER, ALWAYS A SOLDIER...

Celebrations

Monthi Serrao presents the winner's trophy

Harbans Kaur presents Papneja's trophy

The 13th isn’t unlucky at all. Celebrations were in order today as it was Harish Wadhwa’s birthday. And congratulations were in store for Hari Singh Shekhawat who, as winner of the latest edition of the Pehchaan Kaun contest, was awarded a glittering crystal trophy at a brief but charming ceremony outside the China Hut this morning.
The results of Pehchaan Kaun-10 were declared last Saturday (ref post of September 6) when, from a field of 11 all-correct entries, six were short-listed for the final round. A spot question was thrown at them by Jagmohan Papneja, who, till then, was hiding behind a black-and-white photograph of a 14-year-old school boy. Two got it almost correct – Shekhawat and Yusuf Rassiwala.

Happy Birthday, Harish Wadhwa!

Finally, a toss of the coin determined the winner.
The highlight of today’s presentation ceremony was a quaint little drama enacted by Shekhawat. When his name was called out, he responded by taking two brisk steps backward and stood, arms by his side, ramrod straight. Then he marched towards Monthi Serrao swinging his arms, stopped, clicked his heels and lifted his right hand in a smart naval salute. Horrified, Monthi held on to the trophy for dear life, but soon regained her composure and wonder of wonders, executed an equally smart (but NCC) salute. She presented Shekhawat his trophy, shook hands and the ceremony was over amid a round of applause.
The presentation to Papneja (for all his support and cooperation) was more civil with Harbans Kaur doing the honors. She greeted him warmly, exchanged pleasantries and before we realized it, they were through. The short and sweet ceremony was concluded by a round of soft, sublime pedas, courtesy Harish Wadhwa. It was his birthday treat.
Many happy returns of the day, Harish!
Jagmohan Papneja:
* Pehchaan Kaun is an interesting contest. It makes the members of Big Laaf very curious and stay engrossed for a number of days to find out the correct answer. Thereafter, the winner is declared. I convey my compliments to Shekhawat-ji for winning the Pehchaan Kaun-10 contest.
* On the occasion of Harish-ji's birthday, I hope today is the beginning of a great year for him. Many, many happy returns of the day, Harish-ji.
Harish Wadhwa:
Thank you, all my dear members for your good wishes.

On a Roll

Santosh Tyagi holds her daily 'jokes' durbar

The Club is finally on a roll. Over the past couple of days, there has not been a dull moment. The sun is out and people are looking bright and chirpy. Attendance is creeping up and many who were homebound during the rains have begun to stir out. If Shekhawat is determined to make full use of his self-awarded “licence” to fool around, the ladies are one step up, cackling and chuckling like there’s no tomorrow.
Arora had to pick up a stone today and threaten Shekhawat with it so as to curb his playfulness, but when it came to his own turn in the circle, he found an engaging partner in Jagmohan Papneja to chat while the exercises were on. And if all this fun and revelry were not enough, Santosh Tyagi was there with her ready stock of jokes to keep everyone reeling, long after the exercises were over.

Srichand Arora

We can never have enough of her hilarious tit-bits!
Ultimately, we have realized that anything funny is a matter of perception. Because there is one man among us who wears a perpetual sullen look and never finds anything funny unless it comes from women. Everybody knows this man, but out of respect for his age, we have left him alone. The ladies were the first to notice his tendency to sidle up to them and overhear their conversation, only to laugh out loud like a hyena at inappropriate moments. Since then, they have been on their guard.
Today, he was to pass a highly objectionable remark while the ladies were enjoying a joke with Shekhawat. While many took exception, others laughed it off as an expression of jealousy. The running joke now among the men is that this could soon develop into a full-blown turf war. And that would be real fun!
Meanwhile, Arora has taken it upon himself to storm the Registrar’s office in Worli and get the club registration done. It has been a long wait, for almost two years and clearly, he is running out of patience. So whether anybody joins him or not, Arora will be there next Wednesday and not leave the place without a firm commitment from the Registrar. That also will be fun!

Spot Jokes

Harvinder Jauhar

Mumtaz Jahan

Harvinder Jauhar has an incredible sense of humour. An ex-army man with a deceptively casual demeanor, he does not belong to Mumbai, but comes here often to visit his children. And every time he does so, he keeps his appointment at the Garden to exercise daily without fail. In course of time, he has become as close to us as any other member.
Today we got a glimpse of his funny streak when Arora accosted Shekhawat during the Hai Mera Dil number. Arms outstretched, he asked where his dil was and Shekhawat, taken by surprise, looked around wondering what to say. Straightaway Jauhar intervened and declared he was not responsible for Shekhawat losing his heart. “Nahin, maine nahin liya!” he clarified.
This was actually to set the tone of the many jokes and counter-jokes exchanged this morning. But the best one was when Monthi Serrao inquired, in all seriousness if anyone had heard from Mumtaz Jahan. We all know she is currently in Srinagar (her hometown) and with the Kashmir valley ravaged by one of the most devastating floods in human history, Monthi had good reasons to be concerned about Mumtaz’s safety.

Everyone wants to know about Shekhawat's mysterious saalis 

We also know that Shekhawat has been in touch with Mumtaz on telephone and only yesterday, he informed that she is safe as her house happens to be located at an elevation where the flood waters haven’t reached.
Now, instead of repeating this information to Monthi, Shekhawat waxed eloquent on his sister-in-laws. “Kaun saali”, Monthi pressed, utterly confused.
“Not one, but four saalis,” Shekhawat boasted. “I have four saalis in the Garden and I am in regular touch with all of them.”
“Who are the four?” everyone urged in chorus.
Shekhawat was enjoying this. Nahid replied on his behalf: “One is Mumtaz, another is…”
Monthi could not hold herself: “Mumtaz is your saali? Is Mumtaz your saali?”
Now Shekhawat clamped up, allowing the suspense to grow. “Tell us the names of the other saalis.” “Is Mumtaz your saali, Shekhawat-ji?” “Who are the other saalis?” “No.”
Monthi became wise. “Oh artificial, you are talking only artificial saali!” she concluded.

Lull Sets In

End of another day's exercises

As the weather continues to play foul, a lull seems to have descended on the Garden. It is not as though attendance has suffered during the exercises, but nobody’s presence can be taken for granted any longer. Almost everyone has a story to tell about getting dressed early morning and ready to leave home, only to find the skies suddenly opening up. And if there’s no rain, it is plain good luck.
In this climate of uncertainty, the only buzz that can be heard is of Shekhawat planning his Darjeeling trip for next April. Today he buttonholed Bijoy Gupta who claims to have spent many years on a job posting in those parts.

Bijoy Gupta briefs Shekhawat

He says he still has many friends and family members settled there and they would be happy to help and facilitate the excursion. “You have just to ask whatever you want and they will make all necessary arrangements,” he assured Shekhawat.

Muthu 'Unglimaster 'Swamy

“You have nothing to worry at all.”
Shekhawat sought Gupta’s advice on several aspects of the trip – the tourist attractions, places that can be avoided, whether it would make sense going up and down by rail or perhaps, return by air, the best route to be taken – whether to switch trains at Howrah or if there’s a better alternative… and so on. Since he has enough time (more than six months) on hand, Shekhawat wants to explore all his options before firming up on a travel plan that is both economically and physically comfortable to all.
In between, his friend Muthu ‘Unglimaster’ Swamy made an appearance at the Gate and as usual, narrated his ordeal on battling diabetes and how it eventually cost him his big toe last March. Predictably, he broke down at this point and Dilip Babani did his best to console and cheer him up, before Arun Patil took over to narrate his own tale of woe (ref post of September 8). Finding another person sailing in the same boat was obviously more comforting and Muthu trotted merrily into the Garden, ready to jab the first unsuspecting man with his famous forefinger.
Jagmohan Papneja:
It is heartening to note that Shekhawat-ji is going ahead with his ambitious plan on Darjeeling and Gangtok. He is getting help from so many sources for the excursion. Today he was inquiring from Mr Bijoy so as to design a great itinerary. My suggestion is that he should also make an inquiry from Thomas Cook, Kesari Travels, Eezigo etc. so that problems faced in the past can be eliminated. After all, tour operators have their own set up to handle such tours professionally and efficiently.