Day 1664

Pic of the Week

GETTING GRAN'MA TO THE GARDEN

'Who says the younger generation is not caring?' --Bhaswati Bose

First AGM

Jagmohan Papneja presents Secretary's report

It was an AGM like none other. The first annual general body meeting of Big Laaf (since its registration last November) was held today with a proper agenda and quorum in place – 35-odd members, the two chairmen as well as Srichand Arora, Jagmohan Papneja and Monthi Serrao with their managing committee in attendance...
But the way the meeting was conducted, sharp witticisms embellished with colorful prose and punctuated by peals of laughter and resounding applause made this AGM unique.

Milwani presents auditor's report

Shekhawat even did a little jig in his inimitable style. After all, ours is a ‘laughing club’ and getting tied up in formalities and protocol isn't our style.
And yet, serious business was transacted. Papneja did a rewind of the year gone by – from the number of picnics/ excursions the Club organised to the Republic Day, Holi and Independence Day celebrations, the Pehchaan Kaun contests, practice of gifting personal calendars on birthdays, success of the Biryani Nite, providing new caps to all members to acknowledging the generosity of ladies like Mallika Kagzi and Banoo Apa and even placing on record Shekhawat’s latest score on saalis. As auditor, Bihari Milwani read out his report on the Club's accounts and presented the balance sheet for 2014-15. Needless to add, he was appointed auditor of 2015-16 by the AGM. In between, Kiran Prakash delivered a short-‘n’-sweet speech on his experience and impressions of the Club as a new member

Light refreshments for all participants

Kiran Prakash brought Tirupati prasad

while Ved Prakash Grover raised a point of order on not being provided with a copy of the annual accounts. Arora assured him that the needful would be done and went on to outline the plans and programmes of the Club for the future. He urged Shekhawat to organise at least four 'local picnics' and one ‘big trip’ out-of-station before March 2016. He also wanted more Housie sessions, apart from exploring other avenues for revenue generation. It was also decided that funds lying in surplus in our bank’s Saving’s Account should be placed in Fixed Deposit, which would fetch us higher returns. If need be, we may open an account in another bank.

Lull Descends

SHUKLA'S BIRTHDAY BARFI: Look at Sitaram's mouth!

After months of frenetic activity, the Club is suddenly caught in a strange state of ennui. The eagerness and excitement over picnics dried up with the Mahabaleshwar trip last week. Now there is nothing to look forward. No trip is planned for the foreseeable future. Besides, summer is at its peak and the heat shows no sign of abating. Attendance too has dropped sharply. Many members are out on vacation, if only to beat the heat.
This was not the situation till a couple of weeks back when no less than 30-odd members turned up every day for the exercises.

Secretary Papneja reads out AGM agenda

On weekends, the numbers were even more. The Gangtok-Darjeeling trip in March-April, which was kickstarted six months earlier, kept energy levels brimming with Hari Singh Shekhawat occupied full-time on bookings, cash collections, cancellations, etc. In between, he slipped in a day-trip to Chhota Kashmir also. Then there was the enormously successful ‘Biryani Nite’ that again kept adrenalin levels peaking.

Curious members peer into Shukla's birthday calendar

Somewhere along the way, the ball was set rolling for Mahabaleshwar. And now, we have this awkward lull upon us.
Still, there was an occasion to celebrate today, as we ushered in Ram Shankar Shukla’s birthday in the Garden. He has turned 80. He is however, not in the best of health as a peculiar foot problem makes him walk with a limp. “A bone near my right heel has started growing,” he explained haltingly. Yet, he kept his appointment with us and brought a box of barfis as his birthday treat. We gave him a personalized desk calendar as a keepsake with compliments from Big Laaf.
Jagmohan Papneja, as secretary, read out the agenda for the annual general body meeting scheduled tomorrow. This will be our first AGM since the registration of Big Laaf in November 2014. It will be held in the China Hut from 8:00 a.m. onward soon after the exercises. All are invited.
Bihari Milwani:
After the AGM, attendance will increase tremendously as there are as many as SEVEN birthdays in June -- the maximum in any month. And the heat wave will also reduce.
Lt Col Angad Singh (retd):
Happy Birthday Shukla-ji. But as a senior member you have to keep up the discipline of the Club. You are without the Club Cap. This is not expected of a senior member. I wish you many more happy birthdays and a healthy inning ahead. Enjoy yourself!
Jagmohan Papneja:
Happy Birthday Shukla-ji. When I look at you, I don't see an 80-year-old. To me you are six decades young. I see the gleam in your eyes and the look of pure joy on your face. Once again, wishing you an amazing 80th birthday.

Peacock That Wasn’t

Bihari Milwani, back from USA 

Siba Prasad Maitra is congratulated for becoming double grand-pa

Whoever wants to learn how to turn adversity to advantage must come to us. For, even in the worst of conditions – be it peak summer, a torrential downpour or bone-chilling cold – we always find a reason to laugh. There can never be a dull moment for us.
Today, while huffing and puffing in the Garden, suddenly a peacock made an appearance. That was enough to provide some comic relief from the sweltering heat. The exercises were suspended and everybody got together to engage in serious bird watching. The peacock strutted majestically across a bar over the practice nets of the adjoining cricket ground. Rather than checking how it could balance itself at such a height, we were more intent upon ascertaining its gender – till a lady passing by informed that it could neither be a peacock nor peahen. “It is a bird that does caw caw,” was the extent of education she could provide us. She flapped her arms wide to demonstrate what a peacock looks like.
But Sitaram Hivarkar was not convinced. Razia Khan and Khatoon Baig also wanted the damn bird to be a peacock, even as it could be a kingfisher. And since it was at a distance, there was no way to be sure. In fact, many were disappointed they couldn’t prove the smarty lady wrong. In all this, all was forgotten about the terrible weather conditions, the heavy stillness in the air, the punishing humidity and perspiration and we got back to exercising with renewed gusto. A trapeze artiste of a peacock made all the difference.
But there was hope in the end, since Bihari Milwani showed up from his trip to the United States. We welcomed him back with the customary extra fourth laugh and were duly rewarded with chocolates. But more than that, it is his ever-smiling presence and wise cracks in the blog that we would be expecting now.
Siba Prasad Maitra was also back, with good news. He has become grandfather, twice over, as his elder daughter was blessed with a baby boy last Monday. According to him, mother and child are doing fine. Our good wishes and blessings go to both of them.
Bhaswati Bose:
* The heat is having its effect on members. Now they are spotting peacocks in the Garden! Guys, take a break.
* Thank you for the lovely chocolates, Milwani-ji.
* Mr Maitra, when is the treat? Keetnaa deen intezaaar kornaa podeygaaa?

‘Piku’ Effect

Bachchan with a bloated stomach in Piku

All of Mumbai could be complaining of a murderous heat wave, but we aren't giving up yet. We still meet every morning for the exercises. The level of humidity has however, taken a toll on attendance. We are no more than a dozen-odd these days. To make matters worse, there is not a drop of drinking water in the Garden. Even Mallika Kagzi has stopped coming with her two bottles of water. Or else, we could be assured of an occasional gulp to keep ourselves going.
But there is funny side also to our misery.

Dilip Babani

Turns out that most of the absentees are down with upset stomachs (which isn’t really unusual during summer months). Yet, the story going around is that ever since Yusuf Rassiwala treated them to a complimentary show of the movie, Piku (ref post of May 23), they have all contracted Amitabh Bachchan’s famous ‘potty problem’.
So contagious has the movie been that even watching from a distance was enough for the germs to travel from the lighted screen and selectively attack Big Laaf members in the darkness of the auditorium. Till then, they were all hale and hearty (sorry, no names here as they are mostly ladies), ordinarily not given to stomach ailments. Only after watching Piku last Sunday are they all reporting sick.

Making merry when the sun shines

For that matter, even Yusuf has stopped coming to the Garden. And Shekhawat, who has not watched Piku yet, just refuses to go anywhere close to a movie hall – even as Dilip Babani has offered to buy him tickets online and have them delivered at his doorstep. Shekhawat doesn’t want to spend the rest of the summer in a toilet.
The Piku effect does not end there. The central character’s dialogue delivery with a strong (and deliberate) Bengali accent – words like ‘eujeless’, ‘phorchunately’, ‘bhaarjin’, ‘shattisphactorily’, etc.) – has become a recurring joke in the Club. The upshot of this is the mounting suspicion that Siba Prasad Maitra must have secretly coached Amitabh for the film, especially on the Hindi lines. Dilip is actually convinced about it, because, as he points out, nobody can say “Hum aapnaa naangaa paaon kobhi nehi dikhayegaa’ the way Maitra says. In fact, Dilip is determined to address Maitra as ‘Mister Bhashkor Banarji' now!
Jagmohan Papneja:
For members who attend the laughter session regularly, Piku has had no effect. Because the benefits of laughter on the body are amazing. It helps improve digestion. As a result such members function better and waste is discharged more readily from their bodies. So I request everyone to be regular in attending the Club and eliminate not only the Piku but other bad effects as well.
Siba Prasad Maitra:
Yes, I was specially hired to guide Mr Bachchan with the Bengali accent -- even as his wife is Bengali and he had started his career in Bengal. How Dilip-bhai had got to know, I don't know. However, I will be very happy to coach our Big Laaf members on the similar Bengali accent. If anyone is interested, please contact me personally. But the subject will be different and not constipation. This has already been patented by Mr Bachchan in Piku.

Miraculous Comeback

Neelam and Ghasiram Garg drop by

We were treated to a jaw-dropping surprise this morning when an old member, Ghasiram Garg showed up at the Garden with his wife in the middle of our exercises. Many blinked in disbelief, suspending the exercises immediately. If truth be told, nobody ever expected that a day would come when this gentleman would be able to drop by in the Garden to see us.
Garg had suffered a massive brain stroke last year, instantly slipping into coma and was in a veritable vegetative state for close to six months at Kokilaben Hospital. Even the attending doctors and nurses had given up on him.

Wedding Card

Miraculously, the prayers and perseverance of his wife, Neelam worked and gradually he came around. Today, he is able to talk and walk (though with a little help), can recognise people and for all practical purposes, is living a new life.

Sat Sri Akal from Teja Singh Bhambra 

Of course, we did not remind them of any of this. Our happiness on meeting the Gargs after such a long time was palpable and we invited them to join the exercises. They said they had come to invite us to the wedding of their son, Ronak this Saturday, May 30. He is marrying a doctor and the reception is at a holiday resort in Lonavala. All are invited from the Club. Click on the image of the wedding card above to get a clearer view of the details.
If the pleasure of having Garg back was not enough, there was Teja Singh Bhambra giving us another reason to rejoice. After nearly a month, he braved the sweltering morning heat to be with us, if only for a brief while. The last we had seen him was on May 4 when he was sort of under the weather (see post) and his son had to be summoned to escort him home from the Garden. Happily, he appears to have recovered well and promises to join us again for the exercises soon. If only the weather could be a little kind…
Renu Babani:
Congrats to Mr and Mrs Garg who have lots to celebrate. Makes one believe miracles do happen if faith is strong. Their son's wedding must be an added joy to the family. God bless him and his bride-to-be.

Damage Undone

Shekhawat leads the joy train with Prakash at the rear as guard 

Shekhawat today undid the damage done by Bijoy Gupta last Saturday (read post). Not only did he drive his own ‘train’, he also prevented the latter from boarding it. What’s more, he deployed a guard armed with a green flag at the rear end to ensure that no unsavory element gets a ride on his joy train!
Quite clearly, a lot of thought had gone into this during the past two days. Shekhawat even made sure that a saali followed him just one step behind, lest someone again tried to waylay her. But the green flag was entirely Kiran Prakash’s idea.

Najma Sayyad pays us
a surprise visit

He bought the fabric yesterday especially for this purpose and much to Shekhawat’s delight, gifted him a ready made guard’s flag before the exercises. Prakash himself officiated as the guard, thus preempting all possibility of any mischief maker getting into the way. In the end, it was a perfectly executed operation that brought back the smile on Shekhawat’s face.
What Shekhawat does not realise is that there never was any conspiracy to deprive him of his saalis, let alone usurp his position in the Club.

Yusuf Rassiwala discusses Piku with Banoo Apa

Knowing how possessive he is about the ladies, some seniors hatched the prank behind his back (when he was away at Mahabaleshwar) in which the full Club was complicit. Gupta merely played the fall guy. But even he did not expect Shekhawat to take it so seriously and blow his top. He was literally trembling with rage, spouting expletives, at which point, Gupta sensibly backed off. It was no longer funny.
Now that peace had been restored, attention shifted to the movie Yusuf Rassiwala treated some members to on Sunday. Banoo Apa, Dilip Babani and Bhaswati Bose were all praise for Piku and thanked Yusuf profusely for the tickets he had arranged. In his own discreet, unassuming manner, Yusuf had done something unique that cannot be reciprocated. As he explained, the movie “raised a mirror in front of all elderly people” that he wanted us to also see. Indeed, were it not for his kindness and generosity, many of us would have missed watching Piku.
Lt Col Angad Singh (retd) from Mohali:
This is the beauty of our 'Laafter Club'. Shekhawat-ji is again at the helm. No competition. All is well that ends well.

Day 1657

Pic of the Week

Photo-op at Mahabaleshwar (courtesy Mohd Gulzar)

'A true Ladies Special with only two males -- one Motor Man and the other, Guard -- at each end!' --Bihari Milwani

Locking Horns

Till this moment, Shekhawat does not realise that nobody is following him!

For a change, let this post be from Shekhawat’s point of view:

Hands turn to fists

Yusuf R presents trophy to Khatoon Baig

I coming from Mableshwar and going to Garden after 4 days. In my absence, that damn Gupta fellow do big gadbud ghotala behind my back. He confiscating my saalis. Aisa kabhi hota hai? I make one-one saali with difficulty, distributing luddoo in Garden, investing money. Nobody helping me. And he simply doing phurut-phurut with plastic whistle and taking all saalis and everybody in his chhuk-chhuk rail gaadi. How can he doing this? He playing conspiracy with me.
I know this Gupta man very well.

Mediators negotiate compromise

I making his wife my latest saali giving luddoos to full Club last week. But she is actually his saali. So we now sharing same saali. So he becomes my… I don’t know what to call him. Yes, he is kadka-karodpati! He is making me mad. How dare he taking all my saalis on his chhuk-chhuk gaadi?

Jubilant Khatoon Baig holds aloft winner's trophy

By blowing blue whistle can you take everyone behind you? I tolding him today, you cannot get anything from whistling. But he not listening. He fighting with me.

Shekhawat walks away angrily

Now there is another man, Yusuf Rassiwala. Gem of gentleman. I even presenting him Pehchan Kaun trophy today. Before that, he presenting Khatoon Baig winner trophy. But look at this man, he not like the Gupta man.

Khatoon distributes sweets

He giving everyone one-one cinema ticket. Go see Piku at Fun Cinema tomorrow morning free. He paid. This is called good man. He gave toffee also. Khatoon gave barfi also. Banoo giving Mableshwar jelly toffee also. All nice people. And where this damn Gupta coming from!
What he understand of saali? Look at me. I going Mableshwar and made brand new saali for two days. Ask anybody.

Yusuf  R receives trophy

In two days, we became so close, she calling me 'jiju-jiju' all time and when she leaving, she crying. When I also crying, she ask why I crying. I say because you crying. The whole bus was singing Abhi na jao chhor kar…

Yusuf R distributes movie tickets for Piku

Then before getting down from bus, she giving me pappi before all man and ladies log. Ask anyone. This is called saali. What Gupta knowing? Only doing phurut-phurut, that's all? He knows NOTHING at all.
Kiran Prakash:
* Shekhawat-ji, we understand and empathise with you. We have seen how seriously you have been nurturing your saalis. They are so close to your heart. I am genuinely willing to help you in this hour of personal crisis. There are four options: one, generously tip the watchman to ensure that Gupta is not allowed inside the Garden; two, give supari to somebody to... but I know that you are too good to do that; three, go on a vacation with your saalis only to further strengthen the relationship; and four, invite your saalis for dinner once in a week. I am with you and I wish the deepest love of your saalis for you. May God bless you.
* The pictures are communicating what was left unsaid by Shekhawat-ji. What a classy placement of pictures to convey the sequence of events!
Lt Col Angad Singh (retd) from Mohali:
Gupta-ji has a new weapon in his armory. He put the blue whistle to good use during Shekhawat-ji's absence. That is the reason all the saalis joined Gupta-ji's rail gadi without raising a fuss. And nothing succeeds like success. Hope Shekhawat-ji finds some solution to attract his saalis back. Good luck to him.
Bihari Milwani from Los Angeles:
Bade miyaan diwane (Shekhawat ji) aise na bano / Hasina kya chaahe hum se suno... Use AXE (perfume) and see the effect. All your saalis will be back with you!!!

No Show

Mallika's keema-pao party: Too much for too few

The eagerly awaited showdown between Hari Singh Shekhawat and Bijoy Gupta (ref yesterday’s post) did not take place today. The bus from Mahabaleshwar had reportedly returned late last evening, around 9:00 pm. Like others on the trip, Shekhawat was obviously much too tired to stir out in the morning and gave the Garden a go by.
Gupta was nevertheless there itching for a fight, even as he had an appointment to keep at VT Station at 10:00 a.m. He hung around for a while – even participated in the first laughter round – and then, upon seeing no sign of Shekhawat, went away disappointed. Ultimately, Razia Khan led the rail gaadi round with just Jagmohan Papneja, Dilip Babani and Mumtaz Jahan behind.
The diminished turnout today created a problem of a different kind for Mallika Kagzi. She wanted to host a reception of sorts for the Mahabaleshwar group and expecting a full house, she had laid out a full spread -- mutton keema, potato curry, pao and tea for 40 people. Not one to take back anything, she got the 15-odd present this morning to consume the whole lot. Breakfast, lunch and dinner for the day were done at one shot.
Bihari Milwani:
Lions never eat fresh food. Tomorrow they will have the stale food of Mallika and then the fierce fight between two lions will be worth watching!
Lt Col Angad Singh (retd):
Mallika Kagzi is a good hostess. She tries to find an occasion she could celebrate. This is a welcome sign of love. The tea parties of Mallika are always sumptuous and appreciated by all the members.

Saali Defection

Bijoy Gupta

Bijoy Gupta has engineered a major coup in the Club. Taking advantage of Shekhawat’s absence since Tuesday, he has managed to win over his saalis in what is being seen as the first step to wrest control as president of Big Laaf. Tomorrow, when Shekhawat would be back from Mahabaleshwar, Gupta will have a ‘show of strength’ in the rail gaadi round.
“You must all follow my engine,” he instructed Shekhawat’s saalis who now swear allegiance to him. “None of you shall follow Shekhawat’s engine. This applies to everyone else too. Let Shekhawat run his engine by himself, all alone.”
That Gupta has been harboring ambitions to oust Shekhawat from the presidentship of the Club is well known – just that he is not able to pay the Rs100,000 he had promised to seize the post.

Garden tea party, courtesy Mallika Kagzi... as usual

Quite clearly he had been biding his time quietly and then moved swiftly when he saw his rival leaving for the Mahabaleshwar-Panchgani trip.
The opportunity presented itself this morning when Razia Khan complained to Mumtaz Jahan for not giving a treat on purchasing a penthouse in Lokhandwala (ref post of May 15). “Of course, I did, I gave luddoos to everybody,” Mumtaz asserted. “Maybe you didn't come that day. But didn’t Shekhawat tell you?”
“Oh, forget about Shekhawat,” Razia said dismissively.

Arun Patil

“And then he claims to be jija-ji!”
This was the moment Gupta was waiting for. Instantly he offered himself as a better jija (brother-in-law) provided of course, the ladies agree to jump onto his bandwagon. Effectively, he was asking them to defect and oddly enough, Mumtaz readily agreed. Before long, Razia decided to follow her. Gupta looked set now, as though he had pulled off a major victory in life.
Now, if Shekhawat has to reclaim his position, the only option left for him is to stand outside the gate tomorrow morning and prevent Gupta from entering the Garden. Watch this space.
Postscript: Arun Patil was discharged from hospital (ref post of May 13) last evening. He is back home at Room 73, Madhav ‘B’ Wing, Devi Kumari SRA Housing Society (opp Oshiwara Bus Depot), Link Road, Goregaon, Mumbai 400104. Please call him on his cell number 98190 06173 before dropping in.
Bihari Milwani from Los Angeles:
Politics in BIG LAAF family? Or is this backdoor entry?
Lt Col Angad Singh (retd):
I wish Arun Patil-ji a healthy and fruitful life. Hope he controls his sweet tooth. Will be happy to see him soon in the Garden. Good luck.

Killer Round?

Siba Prasad Maitra

Razia Khan

Remember that 1998 rap number, Breathless? It runs on and on like an unending torrent, without a single break in line, verse, stanza or even pause for breath. Now, transpose that into a physical workout and what do you get? Something equivalent to a runaway train – an absolutely mindless rapid-fire series of seemingly endless exercises without a single break or pause in between. You are left breathless.
“You feel at least 10 years younger,” chorused Razia Khan and Jagmohan Papneja at the end of the second laughter round today. Unlike the relaxed, unhurried pace we have been used to, it was decided this morning to accelerate the last five exercises and 108 claps at the end. “You will all die,” warned Mallika Kagzi refusing to be part of the madness. Khatoon Baig also demurred. But once we stepped on the gas, they too joined the frenzy and the exercises that normally take 12 minutes (by the clock) were wrapped up in three minutes flat.
“Tomorrow, we will do it even faster,” said Razia excitedly. “You feel so refreshed!”
But Siba Prasad Maitra sounded a note of caution: “Let us not subject everybody to extra strain. We come here to exercise in a relaxed manner and also have some fun. Some people may not be able to take it on a regular basis.

Santosh Tyagi says her goodbyes before leaving for Delhi

Once in a while is okay…” He also suggested reserving a day in the week, maybe Wednesdays, for this killer round.
It was not the first time we had conducted this experiment. Twice earlier we tried it out – the last time being yesterday when Sitaram Hivarkar became so charged that he even conducted the prayers in full clip. But more than that, what became evident was that not only were we saving time, any possibility of idle chatter or distraction was eliminated. Every single person in the circle was completely focused on exercising and those who could not keep pace, were still doing their best anyway. Most importantly, it was fun.
Srichand Arora demonstrated how rejuvenated he felt by prancing about like a jack in the box and leaping up to score high fives. Watching him, others developed springs on their feet till some like Ved Prakash Grover and Bijoy Gupta were left looking wild eyed, not knowing from which direction the next ‘prancing monkey’ would leap upon them and say, “Jai Sri Krishna!” Pity no photograph could be taken. It happened so fast.
Siba Prasad Maitra:
I also enjoyed the fast, faster and fastest way of doing the exercise. In fact, today we could complete the session by 7:40 a.m. But I observed some of our senior members were finding it difficult to keep pace with the speed and they were not taking part in it. Now it is left with the instructor of the day to decide how to go.
Bihari Milwani from Los Angeles:
Great to know that the BIG LAAF BULLET TRAIN (BLBT) has made a start. Wishia great success.
Lt Col Angad Singh (retd):
The josh and spirit with which grown-ups (NOT 'oldies') are conducting themselves in the morning is commendable. It only shows that the exercises have kept them fit as a fiddle. Keep it up.

Sweating it Out

Mallika Kagzi

Everybody agrees that it is unusually sultry for this time of the year in Mumbai. And were it not for Mallika Kagzi, attendance for the exercises in the Garden would have dropped to zero by now. Every morning, she comes in carrying two heavy bottles of chilled water which is shared by all of us. Nobody has told her to do so. But this is what keeps us going.

Srichand Arora conducts the exercises in the oppressive heat

Or else, we would be dropping to the ground like nine pins out of sheer dehydration.
“There can be no greater virtue in life than giving the thirsty water to drink,” a grateful Srichand Arora complimented her the other day.
Today was no different – except that attendance had dropped further with Shekhawat whisking away a sizeable number of regulars for the three-day excursion of Mahabaleshwar-Panchgani. They left by chartered bus at 6:15 in the morning and as you read this, they could well be gallivanting in the cooler climes of the hill station. They reached at 12:30 pm after a brief stopover for breakfast at Lonavala.
Meanwhile, lesser mortals like us sweated it out in the Garden, seeking distractions to keep the laughter going. Razia Khan stepped into Shekhawat’s shoes to be the engine driver of the morning while Mallika had a blast egging Arora to keep talking even after he had nothing to speak about.

Karishma Milwani with parents

Maitra narrates a 3-in-one joke

And then came the hilarious rapid fire wrap-up of the exercises – just what Jagmohan Papneja wanted to keep us sweating even more. But ultimately, it was Siba Prasad Maitra who stole the show with a charming three-in-one joke that won many hearts.
Incidentally, today was Arora’s wedding anniversary. And Bihari Milwani, who is away in Los Angeles, sent him a beautiful laminated card to mark the occasion. He had gone to attend the convocation of his younger daughter, Karishma who has earned her masters’ in cyber security from the University of Southern California. In the photograph alongside, she is seen flanked by her proud parents. Our hearty congratulations and good wishes go to her.
Kiran Prakash:
* Congratulations Karishma on your achievement. Congratulations to the proud parents too.
* Happy wedding anniversary to Kiran and Srichand Arora. May God grant His choicest blessings on both of you.
Srichand Arora:
Congratulations dear Karishma and many many thanks, dear Milwani family for such a beautiful and meaningful greeting card. Actually I was 100% sure to receive your wishes. Thanks once again, you all.
Bihari Milwani from Los Angeles:
Dear Mallika, from the bottom of my heart I thank and congratulate you for tirelessly doing such a wonderful job of quenching the thirst of all members of BIG LAAF family.
Lt Col Angad Singh (retd):
Heartiest congratulations to Karishma and her proud parents for the big achievement. I wish her more success in times to come. Heartiest congratulations to the Aroras as well on their wedding anniversary. I wish them many healthy and enjoyable years together.

Overbooked

Last-minute 'adjustments' for the Mahabaleshwar trip

The Mahabaleshwar-Panchgani tour, beginning tomorrow, is overbooked. For the first time Shekhawat is faced with a real possibility of having to refund money (collected from four extra people) unless he is able to find accommodation for them.
Shekhawat had arranged for the stay of 20 people in the Mahabaleshwar hotel, but following a couple of dropouts, he began to invite newer members in the group. Suddenly, to his disbelief, he finds that he has taken up more on his platter than he can possibly handle. The hotel has informed that there are no more rooms available – unless some last-minute cancellation crops up.
Shekhawat now has the option to wait indefinitely and keep his four guests in suspense. Or else, he will have to check with the hotels nearby. Either way, he will not get the benefit of any discount on the new bookings.
Meanwhile, Monthi Serrao kicked up a row on Pehchaan Kaun-12, the results of which were declared the day-before-yesterday (see post). She is convinced that Yusuf Rassiwala is fibbing on his shoe size.

Monthi Serrao argues on Yusuf Rassiwala's shoe size 

“How can you say it is No 10?” she demanded. “I don’t believe it!”
Yusuf struck a tribhanga pose, balancing himself on one foot and told Monthi to study the shoe sole of the other. Monthi refused. He then sat on a bench and painstakingly took off his right shoe. The only number decipherable was ‘45’ marked on the instep. “Barobar,” remarked Dilip Babani. “Four and five make nine. So the shoe size must be 9!”
Before Monthi could jump jubilantly, Yusuf reminded her that even if she was right on the shoe size, she had got the age wrong. “But who told you to apply for an auto licence at the age of 28?” she charged. “My husband applied for a taxi licence when he was 21 and he also wore that Gandhi topi. He did not wait till he was 28. He was married at 24.”
Yusuf declared lamely, “I got married at 25.”
“But who told you to marry at 25?” Monthi thundered.
This time Yusuf was at a loss of words. “She is correct,” Dilip instigated him. “Yusuf-bhai, you are wrong. You should not have got married at 25. Neither should you have applied for auto licence at the age of 28…”
Yusuf gave them a look of losing his sanity and walked away without uttering another word.
Bihari Milwani from Los Angeles:
PK-12 ne Yusuf-bhai ka barah baja diya!

Day 1650

Pic of the Week

SILVERLINE TOURS: Anybody for Mahabaleshwar? Hop in!

Has she diversified into chartered long-distance auto travel? But first thing first: She must return the bag left by the last passenger on the rear seat. --Kiran Prakash

Warning: Please double your insurance before hopping in the Bhaswati Bose Express. It has a new owner, new driver and is on a new route. However, if you want to go to Siliguri, this is the No 1 mode of transport! --Bihari Milwani

Chalti kya Mahabaleshwar?!? We are game, if she can manage the permit. --Harish Wadhwa

He is YUSUF R

Yusuf Rassiwala today, at 68

Yusuf Rassiwala at 28

The man on the left is indeed, Yusuf Rassiwala. He wears No 10 size shoes, speaks fluent Gujarati and that picture which kept the Club in a tizzy for a full fortnight was clicked when he was 28 years old.
This brings closure to the 12th edition of the Pehchaan Kaun contest.
Significantly, not a single person had got that right. So in keeping with the rules of the contest, the closest-to-correct entry had to be declared winner. And then there was a tie between Khatoon Baig and Banoo Apa. In the end, Khatoon got lucky by the toss of a coin and was declared winner.
But this was not before the contestants had to go through some anxious moments. There were 22 of them (ref post of April 26, 2015) of which 12 were completely off the mark. The balance 10 (who had correctly identified the man behind the photograph) were then subjected to a unique grading system devised by Yusuf, whereby, for each correct answer to the three questions mentioned, a score of 3 points was awarded.

Yusuf Rassiwala announces the results

Banoo Apa hugs Khatoon, the winner

On Gujarati being the mother tongue, there was hardly any confusion. But on the age and shoe size, a major variance became evident and through a process of elimination and appropriate weightage, Khatoon Baig and Banoo Apa emerged top scorers with 7 points each. Prabha Kapoor was the closest runner-up, scoring 6 points.
At the end of it all, Yusuf had an interesting anecdote to share on the white cap he is seen wearing in the photograph.

Morning cuppa to close PK-12

Shekhawat congratulates Khatoon Baig

It seems he had harboured ambitions to own an autorickshaw in Mumbai when he was in his late twenties. To his good fortune, the state government announced new auto licences at that time, but there was a catch: You had to wear a Gandhi cap, get photographed with it and only then were you qualified to apply for a licence. Yusuf jumped at the chance and did the needful. We do not know if he could eventually get a licence for himself; but surely, that photograph has come to better use now.
Khatoon Baig will be presented the winner's trophy at the Garden next Saturday, i.e. May 23, 2015. Yusuf Rassiwala will also receive a complimentary trophy in acknowledgment of his support at making the contest a success.
Kiran Prakash:
* Congratulation Khatoon-ji. And for you BIG LAAF, you are Entertainer No 1.
* Pehchaan Kaun-12 was indeed very exciting and keenly contested. Yusuf Bhai's systematic grading made it very transparent. I really wonder what made those 10 persons (a big number) see Yusuf Bhai in that 40-year-old photograph -- whether it is their love for Yusuf Bhai or that they have the God's gifted eye to look into the past. The remaining 12 of us, including myself, will genuinely have to do something with God's grace so that we are not so off the mark in PK-13.
Bihari Milwani from Los Angeles:
This is not Yusuf Rassiwala but Yusuf Topiwala. He changed his name after joining BIG LAAF. All entries are wrong!
Harish Wadhwa:
Pehchaan Kaun creates a unique euphoria among members. It is a wonderful contest. Yusuf-bhai indeed looks so nice in the Gandhi topi and the reason for sporting it is also very amusing.

Lucky Talisman

Shekhawat (in red) brags about his talismanic powers 

Hari Singh Shekhawat is on the tenth heaven. At last he has found a reasonable justification for collecting saalis like loose change (ref post of May 4). He has four of them already (on last count), the last acquisition being a replacement for one who dropped out. She is shifting to her new apartment in Goregaon.
Earlier, the oldest of the four had bought a house in Pune soon after becoming Shekhawat’s saali. And now, by a freak coincidence, the latest one has picked up a sprawling 3,600 sq feet luxurious apartment in Lokhandwala for Rs70 million. Even by today’s standards, this is no ordinary accomplishment.

Arora watches the fun from afar

The lady was so overjoyed that she couldn't contain herself this morning and treated us to luddoos while breaking the news.
But Shekhawat is happier than her. All morning he kept projecting himself as a lucky talisman for the women he chooses to ‘ordain’ as his saalis. “See, how three of the four have acquired new property,” he boasted. “They had no plans to do so.

Celebrating the new apartment with luddoos

It happened only after they became my saali. Watch out, the fourth one too will acquire a new apartment soon.”
Clearly, there’s a neat pay-off here. But somehow, the equation does not work the same way for others – especially guys. He had made Ram Shankar Shukla a bum chum, teasing him for running a chain of gurukuls and not sharing the premises with him… till one day, Shukla fainted while exercising. Rukhsana Khan then became the target of his playful jibes till she slipped and broke her hip bone. Bijoy Gupta was the next and predictably, he too became a casualty – falling flat one morning on his back and thrashing his legs in the air.
Shekhawat himself became so terrified of his ‘black tongue’ that he stopped using it for humans and instead, started targeting coconut trees and the like. Making saalis is undoubtedly a better bet – more so, when they stand to benefit with newer apartments in the bargain. After all, Shekhawat is a good man at heart.
Kiran Prakash:
I would not wonder if some female reader of this blog approaches Shekhawat to become his saali, if that's a sure way of getting an apartment in this dream city!
Bihari Milwani from Los Angeles:
Jo mazaa piyali mein hai, woh thali mein nahin / Jo mazaa kali mein hai, woh saali mein nahin... If the saalis are prospering, one can imagine the prosperity of ghar wali!!!
Lt Col Angad Singh (retd):
Mr Shekhawat is lucky for his saalis. He is not so for his male colleagues and not even for the trees. Coconut trees have been cursed and they are not bearing any fruits in the Garden. Enjoy with more saalis.