Salutations

Lakshmi Naidu with Karuna Waghmare

The standard salutation in the Club has all along been either “Jai Sri Krishna!” or “As-Salaam-Alaikum!" An exception is made for Monthi Serrao, who is greeted with a “Good Morning” whenever she comes. Likewise, “Sat Sri Akal!” is reserved for Harbans Kaur while “Om Namah Shivaya” is meant for Ram Shankar Shukla only.

Kiran Prakash learns to say "Good morning"

And when Sitaram Hivarkar walks in, we have to break into “Jai Siyaram!”.
Quite clearly, the universal Indian greeting of “Namaste” is passé to us. We have become much too smart for it. We like to show off our knowledge in the many ways of saluting one another, even as the meaning might escape us. So this morning, when Mohar Singh greeted Lakshmi Naidu (a Malayalee) with the Tamil “Vanakkam!” nobody was surprised. After all, what difference does it make whether you greet someone with a “Namaskaram!” (the correct thing to say in Malayalam)

Hugs and wishes on the eve of the
South India tour

or use the Tamil word for “welcome”?
At least, Laxmi Naidu wasn't bothered. But Karuna Waghmare had an issue. She knew Mohar Singh had made a mistake, but instead of correcting him directly, pointed at Lakshmi and quipped sarcastically in accented English, “She is the Vanakkam!” When told that Lakshmi was not Tamilian, she commented, “Sure!” Seeing everyone around roll in laughter, she suspected something amiss. “English is a phunny language!” she added quickly as though to correct herself.
Meanwhile Kiran Prakash, in a bid to update his knowledge on Chinese salutations, cornered the ta’i-chi girls with the request for a polite translation of “Good Morning”. Obviously, he wanted to graduate from the level of saying “Ni Hao!” or Hello! all the time. And the Chinese girls, in their eagerness to educate him even more, taught him not just “Good Morning”, but what to say for “Good Afternoon”, “Good Evening” and “Good Night” as well. Well, Good Night??? Mmmmmm... Lucky man, he's got more than he asked for.
Kiran Prakash:
Don't be jealous, Blog Monster.
Bihari Milwani:
Everyone greets me with "Banke Biharilal Ki Jai!"
Kiran Prakash responds:
Yes, Banke Biharilal- ji. But you have stopped coming and we are unable to wish you 'Banke Biharilal Ki Jai'.
Adds Bihari Milwani:
Looks like KP is stepping in the shoes of Shekhawat with a Chinese accent!