Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Mortifying Moments

Today Ram Shankar Shukla (right) committed a gaffe, taking everyone by surprise. “Shekhwat na pet se hai!” he remarked. True, Shekhawat has of late developed a prominent tummy, but for a normally quiet and reticent Shukla to suggest pregnancy was a tad out of character.
Shukla was of course, trying to be funny. Call it easy familiarity, cheekiness, or a foot-in-the-mouth affliction, he was only going by the flow of things in the Club where taking liberties with one another has become the norm. Even six months back, when the atmosphere was still formal, he would probably have been more on guard.
The free-spirited, casual ambiance these days is not only self-liberating and fun, but strengthens bonding between members -- though not without moments of mortification as it happened today. Bapu Rane (above left) is a veteran at this (especially in name calling) and invariably ends up biting his tongue. Nahid Khan is another. She may not bite her tongue, but she too had been caught on the wrong foot at calling an elderly gent “not sher, but sher ka bachcha”! And Monthi Serrao? The other day, for no apparent reason, she directed Srichand Arora to change into full-pants if he wanted to be photographed!
The best part is that no offence is taken on all this. These incidents become talking points for us and when reported in the blog, readers enjoy it all the more -- as in the case of Rizwan Khan (rizwankhan3212@gmail.com) who cannot get over the way some of us were made to do murga (see post of November 29, 2011). Extracts from an ongoing correspondence:
I just read your blog post ‘Punishment’. Just tell me was that comedy story a fantasy or fiction or was it true? Did anyone become proper murga? Kindly reply.” (27/10/2012)
“Yes, it is true. Every post in the blog is based on real, day-to-day happenings. Why don't you come over and see for yourself?” (29/10/2012)
I am from Pakistan. I have just started reading your blog and am enjoying it. Can you tell me has anyone become murga for fun?” (30/10/2012)
“Harish Wadhwa, for one. The others also do so, off and on.” (30/10/2012)
How do they become murga? By just holding ears, or properly? Why don’t you post another murga story with a picture? It will be fun." (31/10/2012)
Clearly, what can be mortifying to us, brings abundant cheer to others!
Harish Wadhwa:
Somebody remembering a murga after so many days, months? I openly confess to have been a murga in my school days and once at the Garden -- to bring a smile on faces because I had come late. Becoming a murga is a tough exercise posture. Try it yourself and send us a picture. We will publish it.
Renu Babani:
The weather certainly has a positive effect on everyone. The mere appearance of so many members these mornings proves it.
Rizwan Khan:
Hi friends! Yes, it was I who mailed. Although I can't join you people physically, I do read this blog. Good going. The most exciting part for me was the murga punishment post. I really enjoyed reading that post. It was full of fun and mischief. Have a nice time, friends. And keep becoming murga. It is a form of yoga and exercise... LOL
Srichand Arora:
Dear Rizwan, we are really happy to read your comments on our blog and especially on MURGA. We are planning to make murgi and not murga some time soon so that we can at least watch the murgi laying an egg!

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Crowd Puller

Another faith healer had a go at us today. Unlike the previous one (see post of September 29) who had a quaint laptop-like contraption to diagnose ailments, today’s crowd puller came with the panacea for all ills – clogged hearts, BP, cancer, diabetes, damaged brains… you name it, the cure lay in a tiny volcanic rock, cleverly crafted into a pendant. Much like one-size-fits-all, here was a one-rock-suits-all.
Introducing himself as a ‘network builder’ from Global Group, Pradeep Kadam spoke at length (top pic) about scalar energy and of volcanic rocks curing complex medical problems. To prove his point, he held a series of demos with Ramila Mistry eagerly stepping forward as a volunteer. She struck the classic Titanic pose (bottom pic) only to receive a rude whack on her hand and the arm came down like a railway signal. Next, she was asked to surrender her cell phone and wear the pendant. This time, she could withstand the whack because she was gloriously free of all “cell phone radiation” and enjoyed the blessings of the volcanic rock!
Shekhawat came next. He was to keep his eyes fixed on a finger which revolved round his head. Shekhawat could twist his neck barely 90 degrees sideways before losing sight of the moving finger. However, when he had the pendant on, he could rotate his head a full 180 degrees. A skeptical Jagmohan Papneja jumped in to show that he did not require any pendant to turn his head 180 degrees – only to be warned by some ladies that with a pendant around his neck, his head would begin to spin like a top. Instantly he chickened out.
Many more demos followed (which were in the nature of trust games) providing much hilarity and entertainment, rather than any insight into the magical properties of volcanic rocks. Scalar energy pendants are a known scam. But it was good fun. How many were prepared to pay Rs2,500 for each pendant is another story altogether.
Anonymous:
Your write up is toooo funny! I am still laughing...
Harish Wadhwa:
* With my limited knowledge, I wonder how such things cure ailments? If this were to be so, the world would be wearing pendants and tabeez with no need for doctors and hospitals. I feel that just leading a simple life can heal the mind and body.
* Blog Monster has narrated today's events very nicely -- like a drama, though he himself chose not to hear all and had left early.
* By the way, I have heard that distributing kada-prasad halwa generously during Sharad Poornima week (which started yesterday) also spreads happiness and cures many ailments... due to the 'power' of ghee and dry fruits!!!
Renu Babani:
Energy? This gentleman doesn't realise that all of us together are a volcano of energy ready to spew lava any time. No competition here!

Monday, October 29, 2012

Reunion Time

With Shekhawat back, the Garden witnessed a reunion of sorts this morning. From Yusuf Rassiwala to Ramila Mistry and Srichand Arora to Razia Khan and Nafisa Sayyad, all those missing lately turned up for the exercises today. Even ‘out-of-towners’ like Arun Patil and Bapu Rane were back in circulation.
Clearly, Shekhawat’s phone calls during the week-end had done the trick. (As he was to say, wishing ‘Eid Mubarak’ was only an excuse.) But he also had a couple of important announcements to make. One, the Lonavala picnic would have to be pushed to December because the guest house there is still under repairs. In the meantime, should anyone have a better idea for a day-long outing, it may be considered.
Two, the March 2013 excursion is very much on the cards. The trip -- covering Jammu, Shimla, Dalhousie, Amritsar, etc. – would be followed by a tour of South India later in the year. Monthi Serrao has already worked out an itinerary with a tour operator which will have to be fine-tuned to suit our requirements.
However, from the looks of it, this trip along coastal Karnataka and Kerala is unlikely to work out before September 2013.
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
"We are back and how! Everyone is ready to get into routine."

Sunday, October 28, 2012

Day 808

Pic of the Week
FORBES magazine is launching an Indian edition. This is their inaugural issue. Book your copy... till stocks last!

America's future President. All Indians should vote for him as he has just announced that each and every one will get a Green Card, should he be elected. --Kishor Babani

"Of course, I'll be happy and all smiles... it's FORBES! What an honour!!! --Renu Babani

Wow! So you have replaced Vijay Mallya? Congratulations for being featured on the cover of FORBES. --Srichand Arora

"Watch out, there can be an Income Tax raid any time!" --Santosh Tyagi (oral comment)

"Before the IT raid, he will get extortion calls from the underworld. Who knows, even burglars could land and loot his home!" --Nahid Khan (oral comment)

Seriously, does he have an unmarried daughter at home? We will join the queue of eligible grooms! --Anonymous

"Grover sa'ab, nice to see you in the club of rich and famous billionaires (see top right). Please do not forget this Garden friend of yours. Once in a while a small donation will be welcome!"--Harish Wadhwa

Saturday, October 27, 2012

Safe and Sound

The newsmaker of the day had to be Hari Singh Shekhawat. Back from a trip to his native village in Rajasthan, he looked fresh and energetic, even fairer than what we had seen of him a month back. But more than that, he appeared unaffected from the encounter with his favorite chudail (female apparition) in the village (see earlier posts). “Iss baar kuchh nahin hua,” he declared, much to the disappointment of the ladies who love teasing him (pic above) on his special relationship with the ghost.
But Shekhawat had a new story to regale them with. It seems he went visiting his in-laws in another village and on his return journey, the jeep he was traveling in ran out of fuel. “It was past midnight and we were in the middle of a jungle,” he narrated with dramatic pauses. “It was pitch dark. Not a soul could be seen. Now where could we get diesel in that godforsaken place? Quickly I downed one drink and waited for a passing vehicle to give us a lift to the next village."
Meanwhile, the driver of the jeep had gone away with a jerrican to procure diesel from somewhere. “All this time, my gharwali (wife) just sat on my head as though I was responsible for the diesel running out,” he complained. “Seeing us quarrel like that in the middle of the jungle, a car slowed down and offered to drop us ahead some place. We could have gone, but then I thought, after that what? Besides, what would happen to the jeep if we went away? We did not go...”
Pity, most members missed this electrifying narration, punctuated by peals of laughter and side comments, especially from Harbans Singh and Jagmohan Papneja. Being Bakrid today and a public holiday, many had taken an off. We wish them and all our readers the very best on the occasion. May Allah forgive their transgressions, accept your sacrifices and ease the suffering of all.

Friday, October 26, 2012

Big Blunder

The Club was today seized with a peculiar problem (lead pic) of monumental proportions. Razia Khan (below, right) has not been reporting to the Garden for close to a fortnight and nobody had bothered to call her up. Turns out she is down with a severe case of throat allergy and cough and this morning also, she was at the hospital.
The lady is hurt at our apparent lack of concern and insensitivity. She is also terribly angry. She has tendered a complaint in self-righteous indignation, the text of which is reproduced verbatim:
"Dear Big Laaf family, Happy Dassera. While going through the blog posts, I find that I have been written about as ‘irregular’. As an active member, to be marked ‘irregular’ is a matter of concern. I would have really appreciated had you asked about the reasons of my absence. To bring to your notice, I have not been well since the last two weeks and am suffering from heavy cough, cold and fever. My words are a bit harsh with respect to my current feelings. So please don't feel bad. But I really felt bad that no one even bothered to call me to ask about my well-being. Even Nafisa says, 'Shekhawat hote toh zaroor phone karte'. Nafisa also felt bad."
The message set the cat among the proverbial pigeons. Everyone agreed that it had been a colossal blunder not to have called Razia and insisted that a mechanism be devised to check on long-absenting members. Or else, we could again be accused of gross insensitivity in future.
After prolonged discussions it was decided to phone every absentee every three days and later, we would land enmasse at the person’s doorstep (demanding breakfast?) after the exercises. Out of sheer panic, people would start turning up regularly at the Garden.
Since many had reservations about this, it was felt that Hari Singh Shekhawat (left pic) should take the final call in this regard. He is already in Bombay, having called from the train (while passing through Palghar) at 10:15 a.m. for an update on the Club. He would be at the Garden tomorrow morning.
Bhaswati Bose:
Wishing Razia-ji a speedy recovery. Don't be upset Razia-ji. We thought you were not coming to the Garden because Shahrukh Khan aapko apne ghar le gaya (w.r.t. post of October 14)! Please get well soon and come back. We are missing you!

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Two-in-one Treat

For many, it was a celebration of Vijaya Dashami. For some others, it was a treat to celebrate the blog crossing the 800-day mark. But for most of us, the reasons did not really matter, so long as we got to enjoy mishti doi (sweetened yogurt) – a refreshing delicacy not easily available outside Kolkata.
The two-in-one celebration was actually an excuse to prolong the festive cheer and lift the spirits of those coming everyday for the exercises. Sure enough, attendance swelled and Nahid Khan was back to her bhaigiri – bullying others and getting bullied. [On a point of note, she is one person who does not bend while exercising because "bhais (goons) are not supposed to bend before anyone”!]
Srichand Arora was also there, but for a change he was rather subdued. He complained of acute pain in his heel. He walked with difficulty – thereby inviting loads of unsolicited advice, ranging from dipping his foot in salt water, to applying ice cubes on the affected part, to reducing his body weight, to going for a change of shoes, and so on.
In the end, he was left none the wiser!
Harish Wadhwa:
Kudos to our Blog Monster for the 800-plus unique and interesting blogs. It means that he has been reporting for as many days, which is almost three years. Wow! Great work!!! Also, thank you for the authentic and yummy mishti doi as well. Kehete hain, ghar se meethi dahi kha kar jana shubh hota hai. Made my day today.
Renu Babani:
Kudos to the blog crossing 800 posts! All credit goes to Blog Master. His way of writing ensures that all of us read updates on a daily basis. It takes time and patience to keep everyone interested in the blog. Thanks so much for the regular updates. Congratulations once again!

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

DUSSEHRA 2012

A quiet, lacklustre morning with low turnout, largely due to Dussehra – a day that marks the end of the Navratri and Durga Puja festivities of the past ten days. This is also the day when giant effigies of Ravana, the ten-headed demon king (pic alongside) would be brought down in a blaze of firecrackers and smoke to symbolize the triumph of good over the forces of darkness. As Kishor Babani sagely advised at the end of the exercises: “Let us pledge to destroy the Ravanas within ourselves!”
Sitaram Hivarkar came in towards the end to wish everyone a Happy Dussehra and we also raised an extra laugh to celebrate the occasion. But clearly, after the past ten days of non-stop entertainment and revelry, ‘festival fatigue’ had set in among members, which explained the poor attendance for the exercises. Moreover, the heavy downpour last night was an obvious dampener. We were not even a dozen this morning.
Anonymous:
You got a really useful blog. I have been here reading for about an hour. I am a newbie and your success is very much an inspiration for me.
Dilip Babani:
Happy Dussehra to all members of the Laughing Club.
Harish Wadhwa:
* Thank you members for staying indoors on Dussehra. I was told that many local people and goons were out hunting for Ravanas, killing and burning them in the evening to celebrate the festival! Thank God, all of us are safe (LOL).
* Happy Dussehra to all. May good health and happiness prevail over the evil of ill-health or any kind of suffering. That to me will be a great blessing on the festival.

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Running Joke

The cricket pitch coming up in the Garden has become a joke. With three sides netted (see background of pic) and the fourth opening directly into an open drain, people are wondering if anyone is really serious about the sport. We see empty trucks wheeling in and out every morning and a yellow road roller parked permanently on the pitch. Somebody had flicked its battery once and a watchman lost his job. Whoever came up with this brilliant idea must be having a terrific sense of humour!
The bigger joke though was on Srichand Arora (below left) today. Somehow, we don’t seem to have enough of him and no sooner had he stepped into the Garden than Santosh Tyagi went gunning at him. She pointed at a gentleman on a bench at a distance and informed Arora that it was his ‘jeeja-ji’ (sister’s husband) sitting out there. “Won’t you go wish him?” she demanded.
Now Arora has no sister of his own and the closest he recognizes any woman to be one is Geeta Sardhana (below right) because she ties a rakhee on him every year. How was he supposed to know who her husband is? (Or maybe, he should!) And here Santosh was pointing at a peaceful-looking gent who could get wild the second Arora approached him. After all how can anyone approach a stranger and straightaway address him as “Jeeja-ji”? Besides, Geeta was nowhere to be seen.
Knowing Santosh’s penchant for pranks (post of October 20), Arora pleaded with her to spare him. “Why do you want to get me beaten up early in the morning?” he implored with folded hands. Santosh assured him that for once, this was no joke and that the stranger was indeed his jeeja-ji in flesh and blood. Arora refused to believe her and when he noticed nobody siding with her, he became all the more adamant. He was convinced that Santosh was laying a trap for him.
Ultimately Geeta appeared on the scene and Arora realized Santosh was not pulling his leg this time. Like a good boy he went up and shook hands with the man – his newfound brother-in law.

Monday, October 22, 2012

Mosquito Scare

Yash Chopra’s death after a prolonged battle with dengue has created a mosquito scare in the Garden. Far from expressing grief at the passing of the grand old patriarch of Hindi cinema, members appeared paranoid at the possibility of being next in line. “If tiger mosquitoes could attack him, what would happen to ordinary folks like us?” was the common refrain.
Nahid Khan was particularly agitated about being “besieged by swarms of mosquitoes” who have robbed her of all sleep. A lady advised her to use "Ram Lakshman”. Then she corrected herself to “Lakshman Rekha” – only to realize that the insect repellent works only for cockroaches and not mosquitoes.
Ram Shankar Shukla suggested stringing mosquito nets because nothing else worked in Bombay. The mosquitoes, he said, have become immune to even Tortoise Coils and Good Night. But Srichand Arora and Harish Wadhwa felt that pulling down window nets before dusk should suffice. Kishor Babani argued that keeping one’s surroundings clean and ensuring that no water is allowed to stagnate would be the safest option. Those living alongside open drains would have to be extra careful, he added.
Automatically attention shifted to the open drain running parallel to the Garden which is a potential breeding ground for those killer mosquitoes. A cricket pitch is coming up alongside (lead pic) with arrangements for net practice. Funnily, the nets open to the side of the drain, prompting Arora to speculate if fielders would be stationed there to stop wayward balls. Nobody could provide any other logical explanation.
Meanwhile, Harish Wadhwa scored a bragging point over how he was informed of Yash Chopra’s demise. Unlike the aam janta (“mango public”?) who got the news from television or newspapers, he was informed by Biswajeet – yes, the yesteryear movie star. Harish happened to bump into him last evening and waxed eloquent on meeting such a legendary figure (pic above left) when Biswajeet quietly told him that the “real legend” was no more. Yash Chopra had breathed his last barely an hour earlier.
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
* "What is the commotion about... Yeh machchar neend haram kardiya"!
* "Pleasure meeting you... though wish it were in better circumstances."
Harish Wadhwa:
* Special thanks to Monthi-ji for the sweets. She had kept some exclusively for me, since I was out of town when she had distributed them. Goes to show that people care about the messages in the blog. The sweets were yummy.
* Yes, it was pleasure meeting Biswajeet, thanks to Bose-babu who could recognise him. It is amazing how a chocolate-hero boy looked in his golden days (above right) and what age can do. Must say he was kind and generous to talk to and I wish him a great life in show business.
Bhaswati Bose:
Biswajeet should be a member of our Club. He's a right candidate for Pehchaan Kaun!
Big Laaf: Well, here's another pic (left) of Bishu-da, as he is known today.

Sunday, October 21, 2012

Day 801

Pic of the Week
LOKHANDWALA DURGA PUJA: While someone is deep in meditation, the other has already attained enlightenment!
"Jai Durga Maa... watching over all her children!" --Renu Babani

"Ma Durga, bless our Laughing Club... Ma Durga ki jai!" --Dilip Babani

"Ma Durga, bless our homes!" --Kishor Babani

Why visit pandals when we all have Durga Ma in one form (roop) or the other in our own homes? Unki pooja karo. --Harish Wadhwa

Saturday, October 20, 2012

Divine Intervention

Everyone knows of Santosh Tyagi’s (left pic) wry sense of humour. But no one knows that she is also capable of some fast ones that could leave everyone stumped – as it happened today. Out of the blue she proposed what she believes is the only solution to stem the drop in attendance at the Club. “Instead of exercising, one day we ought to organize a Satyanarain Katha in the Garden,” she declared, tongue firmly in cheek. “The Club has fallen foul of the evil eye!”
Taken aback, Srichand Arora was at a complete loss of words. Still, with folded hands, his head bent double, he endorsed the idea: “Whatever you say...”
Arora’s consent gives rise to the very real danger of being greeted some day at the Garden by a big pot-bellied pandit chanting sholkas amid the sound of tinkling bells and the smoke of joss sticks… all for what? Just to ensure that Yusuf Rassiwala, Sitaram Hivarkar, Dilip Babani, Razia Khan and others become regular for the exercises?
But then, the idea of seeking divine intervention is fine at a time when the air is suffused in religious fervour with the Navaratri and Durga Puja celebrations under way. Bakrid too is coming up soon. Moreover, it is a fact that the low turnout in the Club is being noticed. The other day, a couple of Garden regulars heckled us with the taunt: “Where are your baki members?”
The good part was that Monthi Serrao (right pic) has returned after a long period of absence and was welcomed by the customary extra laugh after the exercises. She had brought coconut barfi for us from Mangalore – something that is a rarity in these parts. But again Santosh Tyagi had the last word. Pointing at a prominent white speckle in the dark brown sweet, she summoned Monthi: “See, how I have lost one tooth biting into your barfi!”
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
* Psst... Shhh, a secret meeting is under way!
* I'm sure everyone will remember these sweets. Enjoy!
Harish Wadhwa:
* Monthi-ji, it should be a practice that the ones who miss out on the goodies should get it the next day. I am one of them. Hope you save my share. Welcome back.
* Santosh-ji has a witty side to her personality when she cracks jokes tongue-in-cheek style.
* Has someone communicated the blog request (posted a couple of days ago) to Mrs Harbans Singh? I suggest that Santosh-ji could do us this favour or get the kada prasad-halwa herself. After all, the Punjabi kudis could decide among themselves. I hope we have made our intentions clear. Right Santosh-ji?

Friday, October 19, 2012

Mishap Averted

A major mishap was averted this morning when Nazma Sayyad suddenly reported unwell and withdrew from the exercises, complaining of breathlessness. Luckily there was a chair around for her to sit and gather herself. But clearly, till the end of the exercises, she was in grave discomfort much as she tried to deflect all attention by pretending to have recovered.
“Never before, did I feel so light-headed and dizzy,” she said as everyone milled around wondering how to reach her home. “Bahut chakkar aa raha tha,” she explained. Khatoon Baig assured us that she would take care of Nazma and drop her home safely by autorickshaw.
Concern had been building around the lady when she broke her daily routine yesterday by not turning up at the Garden. We all knew that she had been suffering from pain in her knee joints, largely due to overweight and a severe arthritic condition. Little did we know she was also having bouts of breathlessness. She was advised to get her BP checked, but for some reason, she did not pay heed.
We can only hope and wish that she takes proper care of her health and recovers soon.
Kishor Babani:
Wishing Nazma-ji a speedy recovery.
Harish Wadhwa:
Good wishes to Nazma-ji for good health. We wish to see her with the usual cheerful smile.
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
"Honestly ladies, I'm fine! It's the heat perhaps..."
Anonymous:
Interesting content. But on the other hand, I would like to point out that there is trouble with your RSS feeds. They do not seem to be working for me. Might be just me. But I thought I would suggest it.
Harish Wadhwa:
What are RSS feeds? I hope it has got nothing to do with Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh.
Big Laaf:
Don't worry, RSS means Rich Site Summary or colloquially, 'Really Simple Syndication'. It has been corrected.

Thursday, October 18, 2012

Nip in the Air

With the onset of the festival season, the weather has turned quite pleasant. The sun rises late, the morning temperatures have dipped and with a gentle breeze blowing across the Garden, it is a pleasure now working up a sweat. Gone are the muggy days when we had to contend with excess humidity, terrible heat, even rainfall and feel drained at the end of it all.
The sad part is that people have become lazy also. They would rather oversleep at home than enjoy the fresh morning air out in the open. Earlier, Shekhawat would call up the habitual absconders and ensure their presence for the exercises. Now that he is away in Rajasthan, the whole lot of them – including Yusuf Rassiwala, Bhaswati Bose, Ramila Mistry, Razia Khan and Nafisa Sayyad – are taking it easy. Even Srichand Arora and Pratap Bhatt have become irregular these days.
And what would you say of those who dutifully show up at the Garden early morning and then, just before the exercises, do the vanishing act? This peculiar practice was started by Sunita Jajodia (left) and before long, Santosh Tyagi caught on. Today Dilip Babani proved that he too has caught the 'Sunita Jajodia bug'. After hanging around in the Garden for nearly an hour, he abruptly walked out of the gate minutes before the exercises were to start! Why had he come in the first place – that too at six in the morning?
But then, it takes all kinds to make this laughter club.
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
Hear me all of you, time for some real laughter!
Srichand Arora (right):
Friends, please forgive me for not attending the laughter and exercise sessions regularly. Actually my brother-in-law (my wife's brother) is not keeping well and I have to attend to him. I was with you on Monday. Then on Tuesday, I had to join him at Saify Hospital at 6:15 a.m. Again on Wednesday I was with you. And on Thursday, I had to join him to Tata Hospital. I met Mr Shukla in the morning when he was leaving the Garden. Anyway, I will not be regular for next couple of days, but once things settle down, I will be regular. This is a promise. Sorry once again.
Harish Wadhwa:
* Dilip-bhai waited at the Garden for Kajal-ji to join him. When she did not turn up by the start of the exercises, he rushed home in desperation (LOL).
* It was nice to see Kishor-da resuming the Joke Katha to break the monotony of the exercises.
* Arora-sa'ab, your brother-in-law will be in our prayers for a quick recovery. May God bless him and that he regains good health soon. Being with your loved ones in times of need is a gentlemanly act. Keep it up. Everything else, including exercises, can wait.

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Autumnal Festivity

The autumnal festivities have just begun. Through the nine nights of Navaratri, we are propitiating the Mother Goddess in a ritualised whirl of garba and dandiya dance at every neighborhood corner. In between, we shall be celebrating Durgotsav or the Durga Puja from Saturday which would culminate on October 24 (Wednesday) with Dussehra – to be followed by Diwali or the festival of lights in mid-November. The common thread running through all these festivals is celebrating the triumph of good over evil.
Being an auspicious time of the year, the overly devout are already busy with their pujas and rituals and have stopped visiting the Garden to exercise. Some have left for their ancestral homes to invoke the goddess there. But that did not deprive us of our daily dose of morning entertainment – Nahid Khan (right pic) being at her cheekiest best today. She took a dig a Srichand Arora, advising him to take badaam (almonds) to get his memory back for conducting the exercises. Arora’s fault: He goofed up on the sequence of the laughter round.
Earlier, for the Lion and Lioness Laughter, when Arora gave the call, “Chalo, sher ban jaao” two late-comers ambled in and joined the circle – only to provoke others to comment, “Sher aa gaye!” Nahid looked around and her eyes fell on the gentleman (name withheld) who is somewhat vertically challenged. Without a second thought, she blurted out, “Sher nahin, sher ka bachcha!” Shocked, the whole group broke into titters. But Nahid kept a straight face, earplugs firmly in place, as though nothing had happened.
Small incidents like these add to the festive spirit, of joy and bonhomie, without anyone having to make a song and dance about celebrating. Still, in keeping with the occasion, Harish Wadhwa (left pic) sang a soul-stirring number on public demand.
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
"What's on your mind Madam?"
"Nothing, was just thinking of which pose suits me?"
Harish Wadhwa:
* Nahid-ji, your picture resembles that of the Murphy Baby of yesteryear... just that he has an innocent look and smile.
* As I can see Mrs Harbans Singh coming regularly, I request her to get us some home-made kada-prasad that she makes so good. The 'news' of it and its khushboo will attract many more members and improve the attendance. You see, we care so much for each other, their health and well-being... that we can go to any extent to woo them to the Garden. (I hope she is reading this; else someone can pass on the message gracefully to her.)

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Honeymoon Anniversary?

After being such a phenomenal crowd-puller for his 31st Marriage Anniversary yesterday, Kishor Babani should have announced a ‘Honeymoon Anniversary’ for today. This was the advice his friends solicitously offered, considering that not even a third of those who attended yesterday’s bash showed up this morning. We were merely 10 for the exercises. Towards the end, Sitaram Hivarkar came in as the eleventh man. By the time he took his position, Sushma Gupta upped and disappeared. So we remained 10 through the morning.
Mrs Harbans Singh was rather charitable towards the absentees when she commented that they probably “needed rest to digest what they had consumed yesterday”. Kishor also gamely explained that although he had not invited anyone specifically for yesterday’s party, the “call went out from the heart” and everyone came. But we all agreed that some serious research ought to be done on how people, without being told, get drawn by the “scent” of a party.
Also, maybe someone could explain why Ved Prakash Grover is so happy (top pic) after taking away the chair Nazma Sayyad was sitting on this morning!
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
Want to try reaching up for this?!!
Harish Wadhwa:
* Grover-ji, kisi ki kursi iss tarah nahin kheech leni chahiye. Dil toot jata hai. Upar se aap khushi se muskura bhi rahe hain... (LOL) Nazma-ji aap se udaas ho jayengi. Woh baat alag hai ki iss duniya mein sab khel aur kissa "kursi" ka hee hai.
* Bhatt-sa'ab you were great company at the Badmaash Company chai today amidst chhate huay badmaash. Please come more often.
* Tara Chand-ji, we all remembered you on your birthday and celebrated with an extra laugh today. Here's wishing you belated Happy Birthday once again.

Monday, October 15, 2012

Double Bonanza

The drought is finally over. The Garden today burst into a riot of colours (pic above) with a flurry of activity accompanying Kiran and Srichand Arora’s return from their overseas vacation and equally significantly, Renu and Kishor Babani's 31st wedding anniversary celebration in the morning. The events coincided as a double bonanza for the Club, which has been starved of a party for days, if not weeks.
Arora was back from performing Ganapati Puja at Singapore – an appointment he has been keeping meticulously with his son year after year. [Remember, the beautiful picture he had sent us of the ceremony (post of October 1) at home.] This time though, he extended his trip to Australia and has come back with happy stories and of course, lots of chocolates for all us (pic left).
The Babani couple’s celebration came as a bolt from the blue. Many were taken by surprise when they were suddenly presented boxes packed with snacks and crispies soon after the exercises. They wished Renu and Kishor “another 31 years of togetherness”, but the real tamasha took place when Dilip Babani went down on his knee and presented bhaiyya and bhabi with a red rose in true filmi style (pic alongside). Now it was their turn to be surprised!
The best thing about the morning was that Sunita Jajodia, Vandana Kankanwar, Sandhya Narang and others known to be not-too-regular, were all present to partake in the celebrations and bless the Babanis. With Purushottam Sharma circulating pictures on Kashmir, Harish Wadhwa flexing his vocal chords in an impromptu love song and Yusuf Rassiwala as usual, fooling about with Arora, the festive feel was complete.
Pity, Tara Chand Seth (right pic) could not be part of all this. He is the senior-most member of the Club and today was his birthday. Since he has left for Delhi, we can only reach out to him through this blog and wish him the very best on the occasion. Many happy returns of the day, Tara Chand-ji – from all of us!
Renu Babani:
* Kishor and I would like to thank everyone. All of you made this day very special for us and unforgettable.
* Dilip, as brother, you gave us the best surprise. It is the thought that counts.
* PICSPEAK: Party and goodies, packed with fun and laughter. A beautiful way to begin the week!
Harish Wadhwa:
* "31 saal pehele/ Mujhe tumse pyaar tha (1)/ Mujhe tumse pyaar tha (2); Aaj bhi hai aur, Kal (31+ saal aur) bhi rahega..." --from Kishor-da to Renu-ji
* Happy Anniversary to the two of you. May you have many more happy years of togetherness.
* Today’s Badmaash Company had a solid strength of 10 members with Dilip-bhai stealing the show by presenting his lovely brother-bhabi with a rose and Kishor-da adorning Renu-ji’s hair with it (pic left). Kya scene tha! Dilip-bhai even bought sheera from the nearby shop, just to have all of it by himself(?) and giving only prasadam to the others. (Hee...heee)
* One prankster even sneaked away the goodies-box of a fellow friend and slipped it into Ramila-ji’s handbag -- just for laughs. One could see her fuming and embarrassed. The prankster got away unpunished... but he will be punished suitably some day...Hmm.
* Some people are still children at heart, aptly seen in Arora-ji asking his wife for a chocolate?!? Kiran-ji of course obliged by saying "Sirf ek hi milegi, bachchon jaisi harkatein na kiya karo, sab dekh rahe hain!"
* Happy Birthday, our senior-dear member, Tara Chand-ji. May you have a long, healthy and a happy life.
Bhaswati Bose:
* Happy Wedding Anniversary to Kishor and Renu. Janam Janam ka saath hai nibhane ko...
* Welcome back Arora-ji and Kiran-ji. Aap dono isi tereh ghoomte rahien aur hamare liye chocolates laate rahiye!
* Wishing Tara Chand-ji a very Happy Birthday! May you have a wonderful time with your near and dear ones.

Sunday, October 14, 2012

Day 794

Pic of the Week
FRAMED, PACKED AND GIFT-WRAPPED BY THE REAL SHAHRUKH KHAN!

"Would anyone like to autograph this photo for me? Yeh meri maa jaasi hai!" --Renu Babani

"Now eat your hearts out ladies, Shahrukh is taking me home!" --Bhaswati Bose

Shahrukh Khan has found his new, beautiful, super-duper heroine. Very soon he is going to launch her in his forthcoming movie! --Kishor Babani

Now Razia Khan will not be able to go to the Garden! She'll be so busy with SRK :) --Tahera

Razia ko Shah Rukh mil gaya... Ab mera kya hoga?!? --Nafisa Sayyad

Razia-ji abhi celebrity ban gayi Bollywood mein! --Dilip Babani

Razia-ji, kya baat hai! Shahrukh Khan-and-all haan? (Aur Nafisa-ji, aap ke liye Ranbir Kapoor hai na. SRK agar Razia-ji ke saath movie karega, toh aap ke saath Ranbir Kapoor movie banayega.) --Harish Wadhwa

"Le chal ghar mujhe Shahrukh, Tere Mannat ko bana doongi jannat!" --Anonymous

Razia-ji ki heroine banne ki umar beet chuki... toh Shah Rukh unko leke kya karega? --Ramila Mistry

"Ramila-ji, vaise toh Shah Rukh ki bhi hero banane ki umar toh beet hi chuki hai. Ab toh dono hero/heroine ke parents ke role karenge naa. Aur dekhna tum sab log, agli movie mein dono khijab ki jagah choona lagaakar baal safed karenge!" --Srichand Arora

Saturday, October 13, 2012

Weekend Euphoria

At the Club, life seems to have fallen into a predictable pattern. The week usually begins on a dull note with very few members (what with the ‘Monday morning blues’) turning up. By Wednesday the momentum picks up. Thursdays would invariably see a full house with the mischief makers in their elements. On Friday, someone would hijack the proceedings and things go berserk. And then, with Saturday, all the excitement boils over – be it in the form of mass leg-pulling, unruly behaviour, a birthday party or some celebration, crazy antics…
You don’t need a trigger for any of these. Things just happen, like Razia Khan today, forgetting her cues while conducting the exercises – so engrossed was she with the music on Kishor Bhabani’s mobile. But while everyone picked on and teased her, there was not a single person who did not have one ear on those 'golden oldies' of Rafi and Lata.
Soon everything else became inconsequential. No one was listening to Yusuf Rassiwala’s wisecracks nor watching Nafisa Sayyad’s hilarious mimicking of yesteryear movie stars or Bapu Rane’s madcap dance movements… And yet, when a peppy number came on, we were all clapping together and ready to perform a little jig – just that the exercises could not be interrupted. Still, it was euphoric -- pure, unadulterated fun.
Incidentally, Bapu Rane (right pic) is joining the festival exodus (post of October 11) by taking off for his ancestral village today – this time not to count mangoes, but welcome his Devi Mata on Dussehra. He offered to take along anyone willing to accompany him. We politely declined, but wished him a safe and enjoyable journey. He would be back in a fortnight.
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
* So many of us, always having fun, wish we had more time together!
* Smiling as always, our Gandhiji!

Friday, October 12, 2012

Memory Lapse

Yusuf Rassiwala did a Rip Van Winkle today when he turned up at the Garden after what seemed like ages. He was last seen at the Eid Party. Naturally, he had to be the cynosure of all eyes with everybody inquiring about his health and wanting to know where he had disappeared. Nahid Khan put an end to all the fussing about by ordering Yusuf to go conduct the exercises – as a ‘punishment’ for playing hooky.
Abruptly pushed in the middle thus, Yusuf needed time to regain his bearings. He faltered repeatedly, got the sequence of exercises wrong, almost skipped the kissa kursi ka round till he was reminded… all of which he blamed on the “ghanti (bell) not ringing” in his brain. These lapses were understandable. But when he addressed Nahid as "Khatoon-ji", the brain damage was confirmed. Khatoon Baig, who was standing nearby, protested and wonder of wonders, Yusuf promptly called her “Razia Begum”!
That was when we gave up.
In all likelihood Yusuf was feigning amnesia, deliberately, in order to keep us all entertained. For, that is his style. But the good thing was that he looked unusually dapper and young (lead pic) this morning, and claimed to have never felt better. “Honestly, I did not miss coming to the Garden for the exercises… I have been maintaining a very active life,” he explained.
Keeping the spirits soaring, Kishor Babani (another prodigal) and Santosh Tyagi got into the mood of narrating jokes after the exercises. This was something we had been missing for quite some time. It was a brief session, but with both of them well-prepared and in full flow, the morning ended on a fabulously joyous note.
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
* I can act like a scarecrow today. It's a new exercise. Want to try it?
* Brothers in arms, always ready for a laugh at any time.

Thursday, October 11, 2012

Slack Season

So Monthi Serrao has left for Mangalore. Srichand Arora is shuttling between Singapore and Australia. Harish Wadhwa is camping at Kochi. Hari Singh Shekhawat is twiddling his thumbs in a Rajasthan village. Tara Chand Seth is twiddling his toes in Delhi. Mumtaz Jahan is staying put in Srinagar… But they are not all.
With the Navratri and Dussehra festivities round the corner, the exodus would continue, leaving the Club drained of its core strength. Today we were reduced to barely a dozen during the exercises (in pic). In the beginning, we were just three – Hari Naraiyani (left) making a surprise appearance. But he too would be leaving soon as his tickets for Amritsar have been booked for October 17.
The worst part is that many who are in town are deliberately keeping low for one reason or the other. Yusuf Rassiwala, Sunita Jajodia, Bhaswati Bose, Razia Khan and Nafisa Sayyad, Sushma Gupta and the Babanis were all conspicuous by their absence. We hope that all is well with these people and good sense prevails in getting them to return to the Garden. Or perhaps announcing a party at this stage would not be a bad idea!
Renu Babani:
* I am under the weather. Flu has gotten to me; will not be attending for a few days.
* PICSPEAK: Less or more, we shall attend as much as we can... not like the lazy ones at home!
Harish Wadhwa:
* Don't worry, I am returning this weekend. But it is heartening to see the select few are still regular at the Garden. While at Kochi, I am enjoying the south Indian cuisine and lush greenery.
* Hey guys, I am missing the Badmaash Company chai desperately here. Good place and food, yet lonely inside!
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Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Laughter Junkies

We have become laughter junkies. So addicted are we to the fun and games during the exercises that if, for some reason, we are deprived of this daily morning fix, we would perforce invent some drama - whip up something out of nothing, blow things out of proportion... so long as we are able to generate an extra round of laughter and return home on a high.
The first round of extra laughter today went up for Purushottam Sharma (below, left). He landed here yesterday from Delhi and made sure to be with us first thing in the morning. Soon after the exercises, he went around distributing the photographs he had clicked during the Kashmir trip last month.
The second round of extra laughter went up for Monthi Serrao. She is leaving for Mangalore tomorrow and insisted on occupying a garden chair (lead pic) flanked by her friends – just for kicks. In the process she dislodged Najma Sayyad from her perch, but that only added to the overall bonhomie and merriment of the morning.
A third round of extra laughter would have gone up for Arun Patil (right) had he announced what lies in store on the trip scheduled for March 2013. At Shekhawat’s behest, he has tweaked the itinerary to include Simla (among other scenic spots) and proposes to extend the trip from eight days to ten without much of a difference in costs. This is still work-in-progress, in consultation with a transport operator in Jammu.
Meanwhile, the movie mavens of the Club went for today’s afternoon show of English Vinglish – Sridevi’s comeback vehicle after 15 years. She has been cast in a deglamorised role, as a middle-class Maharashtrian housewife who tries hard to come to grips with the English language, and succeeds. Renu Babani, Monthi, Bhaswati Bose, Kiran Sajjan etc. should have the details.
Renu Babani:
Good movie, worth watching. Strange how children can be insensitive and blurt out exactly how they feel while talking to their parents. Will not divulge further details in case others might want to see it.
Bhaswati Bose:
Simple engaging movie. Don't miss it. You get to see New York also.

Tuesday, October 09, 2012

‘Superman’ Returns

Our good old friend, ‘Gabbar Uncle’ showed up in the Garden – fresh from a talent show on national television. Many like Santosh Tyagi had seen him in the programme. For all others in the Club, he had a recording stored in his cell-phone, which he proudly played soon after the exercises.
 While Prakash Motwani and Pratap Bhatt (pic alongside) intently went through the clip, the ladies -- especially Monthi Serrao, Geeta Sardhana and Nahid Khan -- wanted to see him in ‘live action’. For their benefit and much to the delight of all present, the young man did the Superman act (bottom pic) he had performed on TV. He took a few steps back, launched off on a monologue, gave his own cue and with a flourish, rushed ahead like a torpedo and ended his run with a flailing leap in the air!
Gabbar Uncle (for that is what he calls himself) is a struggling actor, anxious to get a break in the film industry. The last time he was around (see post of April 19, 2012), he said he wanted to be a comedian (unlike his namesake who appears as a dreaded outlaw in the movie Sholay) and performed a few skits to entertain us. Much as we appreciated his talent and drive, there was little we could do but to wish him well. A bystander even gave him a hundred-rupee note to keep his conscience at rest. But this time around, ‘Gabbar Uncle’ was not looking for money or sympathy. He is a proud man now, having got a foot into Bollywood's door. He is ‘Superman’.
Renu Babani's PICSPEAK:
"I ain't interested in the small stuff. I believe in dreaming big!"