Welcome 2016

Farewell 2015

GOODBYE 2015

The sun rose today for the last time in 2015. The Garden was bathed in a mellow, golden light as we assembled for the exercises, buoyed by a feeling of joy and triumph – joy, because it was Siba Prasad Maitra’s birthday; and triumph, because yesterday (ref post), we could obtain the seemingly ‘impossible’ permission to hold our Annual Day function in the China Hut on January 16, 2016.
All morning everyone was singing paeans of praise for Hemant Nair, the Celebration Club bossman under whose purview our Garden falls. Clearly, news of the delegation that met him yesterday and the outcome of that meeting had already reached many members. Still, Shekhawat formally briefed us on how it had taken "all of 10 seconds" for Nair to give his nod and what remains now is making a written request from our side to him.

Shekhawat briefs us on yesterday's meeting

As Big Laaf president, Srichand Arora said he would draft the letter today and complete the necessary formalities.
Effectively, this means that we will NOT have to pay for using the China Hut and NOT look out for another venue to hold the Annual Day function. (At one point, there was a very real possibility of shifting location to Chhota Kashmir in Aarey Milk Colony!)

Maitra receives birthday calendar

The permission however, comes with the rider: Eatables and beverages will not be allowed inside the Garden. We will have to make do with packaged food, to be consumed outside.
Maitra showed us how to make a celebration of this when he distributed food boxes after the exercises as his birthday treat. Always cheerful and today, doubly so, here is one man who is as much admired as he is adored –

The welcome cuppa 

Tara Chand blesses Maitra

so much so that there are many among us who drop by only when he is there and cannot but hang on to every word he utters. All those fan boys and girls were around today, wishing him the best and many, blessing him. Even Mallika Kagzi insisted on giving him ashirwad and landed several thumps on his head. And who can forget that look of awe and disbelief in the eyes of Banoo Apa as Maitra warbled a couple of Bengali numbers for her benefit? Sadly, he had to leave in a hurry because it was a working day for him. May our ‘birthday boy’ remain forever cheerful like this and bring cheer to everyone around for all time. Happy Birthday, once again, Mr Maitra!
Bihari Milwani:
Request all members to strictly adhere to the condition imposed and not eat in the Garden. This is good for us also as otherwise, some other group may spoil the Garden on a flimsy excuse.

In Fits and Starts

Kiran Prakash conducts another meeting for the Annual Function

It’s been a fortnight since the Club took the decision to hold its Annual Day function on January 16 and things have been moving in fits and starts after that. Now, with just about another fortnight left, Kiran Prakash made a valiant bid yet again (ref post of December 23) at mobilizing members for the event and called a meeting after the exercises to finalise matters.
As it turned out, the discussions that followed proved to be placing the proverbial carriage before the horse. Midway through the meeting Shekhawat revived the question of deciding on the venue and whether the Celebration Club (which is the custodian of the Garden) had granted us permission to hold our function in the China Hut.
Of course, we have an alternative, as suggested by Siba Prasad Maitra to use the facility in his housing complex for a nominal rent of Rs500. But that option was voted out by a show of hands earlier in the morning. Clearly, most members were averse to leaving the premises of the China Hut –

Mallika holds aloft the new tea flask

the venue of our last Annual Day function on April 2015.
After prolonged discussions it was decided

Show of hands over fixing the venue

that a small group representing Big Laaf would call on the secretary of Celebration Club today itself at 12:30pm and apprise him of the situation. The delegation would comprise the two chairmen (emeritus) Yusuf Rassiwala and Shekhwat as well as Kiran Prakash, Monthi Serrao, Swati Punjabi and Dilip Babani among others. It was felt that only after getting the green signal from Celebration Club would we proceed with preparations for the Annual Day function.
Nevertheless, for the record, there were some interesting points that came up in the first half of meeting. The most fascinating one was mooted by Monthi who described a classroom situation (for the function) with all of us playing ‘students’. Shekhawat was so bowled over by the idea that he started clapping hysterically when Monthi declared that she would play the ‘teacher’. Later, she added, she would perform a ‘step dance’ also.
Kiran Prakash:
We met the Secretary of Celebration Club this afternoon. He had no objection to our holding the Annual Function on Saturday, January 16, 2016. He only wants a request letter from us giving details of the proposed programme. He has also requested us to hand over food packets, etc. to members as they leave the Garden and not to consume the same within the premises.

Big Breakthrough

Mallika Kagzi (seated) spells out her conditions for getting tea

Trivial as this may appear, our problem of having tea in the Garden has been sorted out. Mallika Kagzi has very kindly acceded to our plea to accept PAYMENT for the tea she gets for Club members on request, especially in these cold wintry mornings.
She however, put forth one condition: The Club should provide her a "nice" thermos flask.
The first to jump at this was Siba Prasad Maitra. This morning he requested her for the tea he intends treating us to on his birthday the day after tomorrow. Ordinarily Mallika would have volunteered with hot home-brewed tea (as she has been doing in the past), but now she will have to accept payment from Maitra for this favour.
Earlier in the morning, Santosh Tyagi had wanted to give us tea along with the biscuits she had brought from Delhi. She did not want to bother Mallika and had relied on the tea vendor close to the Garden who had been catering to us, off and on, for the past several years. This morning he refused.

Santosh Tyagi treats us to biscuits

He said that unless we obtain permission from the watchman at the Garden gate, he cannot send us the tea. Twice in the recent past, he had been

Khatoon Baig

refused entry in the Garden, he explained.
Santosh did not want to kick up a row and we all settled for having the biscuits without tea. It was humiliating and left a bad taste – more so, since the issue of lifting the restrictions on food and beverages (ref post of December 10) is yet to be formally taken up. That was when a collective decision was taken to no longer be at anybody’s mercy and that we would have our celebrations as before and collectively face the consequences.
In an unrelated development, we hear that Khatoon Baig is going through a terrible time because of asthma. She hadn’t quite recovered from the hospitalization in Hyderabad (ref post of December 2) and given the cold wave and pollution levels in Mumbai, her condition had badly aggravated. She was hospitalized again – at Kokilaben for a week and last Saturday, we are told she was discharged in a relatively “stable” state. The worst is over, but she is still in distress. Let us all pray for her.

Futile Exercise

The 'disciplinarians' debate and discuss

Nobody turned up for any delegation (ref post of December 26) yesterday. Instead, an animated discussion broke out this morning over habitual late comers and those 'arriving late-and-leaving early' with Yusuf Rassiwala and Arun Patil (among others) taking strong exception on a complete breakdown of discipline in the Club.
“That is why I have stopped conducting the exercises,” said Yusuf R. “The way people come in casually and leave whenever they like makes my temper shoot up. Even in our homes, when someone goes out, everybody is informed.

Shekhawat (ext right) is crestfallen

No such courtesy is shown here.”
“And why must we greet everyone who turns up late for the exercises?” questioned Arun. “We ought to ignore these late comers. By welcoming them, we not only encourage their late-coming but also disturb the flow of exercises.”
The discussion continued back and forth along these lines with allegations and counter-allegations flying thick and fast and eventually, everybody agreeing that this was all an exercise in futility. “Tomorrow everybody will be back to square one,” concluded Yusuf R. “Nothing is going to change with these people.”
Fortunately, many of them were not witness to Bijoy Gupta ribbing Shekhawat early morning on the absence his saalis today. Not one of them had turned up today leaving Shekhawat crestfallen and lamenting that it was a ‘black day’ for him. “But seriously, how do you expect women to come to you?” needled Gupta. “Not even a dog comes to me!”
In all this, Santosh Tyagi brought about some post-Christmas cheer with a generous round of gajak – the cold weather crispies she picked from her recent visit to Delhi. And then, there were the Babanis, Kajal and Dilip who gave their daughter, Neelam in marriage last week. They dropped by to celebrate with us – with rich, mouth-watering barfis stuffed with raisins and dryfruit. There were sugar-free kaju-katlis also, for the diabetics. Our best wishes and blessings go to the newly weds.

Delhi gajaks from Santosh Tyagi

Wedding kaju-katlis from Kajal

Wedding barfis from Dilip

Day 1853

Pic of the Week

SANTA MONTHI IS COMING... TO TOWN

Monty looks like Santa Claus!!! Thanks for the cake. -- Swati Panjabi

Touch wood, Santa Monthi looks very charming! --Anonymous

Inflamed Passions

Shekhawat sounded a word of caution early morning: “If you don’t get permission to stage the Annual Function (on January 16), what is the purpose of all your preparation?”
Well-meaning as the warning was, it instantly led to the outpouring of pent-up emotions over the recent 'prohibition' on consumption of eatables/ beverages in the Garden.

Everybody is equally confused and agitated

Siba Prasad Maitra offers a 'solution'

The absence of anyone to represent us led to a further flare-up of tempers after the exercises.
“Are we dogs that we’d have to eat by the roadside?” exclaimed Banoo Apa, recalling Lakshmi Hadimani's plight yesterday on having to celebrate her birthday by distributing food packets outside the Garden gate. Nahid Khan narrated that she had asked our Club secretary Jagmohan Papneja (who happened to be passing by) to intervene in getting the packets inside the Garden but he proved most uncooperative. “He took his box and simply walked away,” she reported.
Others spoke of ‘kitty parties’ in the China Hut during the evenings and that we are being made to pay the price for their sins. "Whatever party we have in the morning, big or small, we do not leave behind even a scrap of paper,” Mumtaz Jahan pointed out. “Somebody should go and tell them that.”
But who is there to speak for us?
Tara Chand Seth suggested we prepare a written petition, collect signatures and submit it to Celebration Club, the custodians of the Garden. “We must say we are senior citizens, that we have had an impeccable record and suddenly, after 12 years, they cannot start penalising us.”
Many suggested we go by Yusuf Rassiwala’s advice and continue doing what we have always been doing and if someone has any objection, he should come to us rather than we go to him. Razia Khan however, felt that we cannot take chances on the Annual Function because in the event of the program being disrupted midway, we would need something to fall back on. “All our efforts will be wasted,” she cautioned. “That is why we need their permission before proceeding any further.”
Siba Prasad Maitra came up with a solution. “You can use the facility in my building complex,” he suggested. “It would be perfect for our function. You can eat, drink, do whatever you like… and the hiring charges are only Rs500 per day.”
Shekhawat however, felt we must speak to Celebration Club first and offered to lead a delegation tomorrow afternoon (Sunday) at 4:00 pm. Watch this space.
Bihari Milwani:
* We have two retired military officers in our club -- Col Angad Singh and Major Shekhawat. We should ask them to come armed with their AK47s at the Annual Celebration.
* I think we need to explain to the security that it is only "consumption of eatables and beverages" that is prohibited and not the distribution. Like last year we will be distributing the packed food items which will not be consumed in the garden. There should be no problem for any one.

Christmas 2015

Lakshmi celebrates her birthday

Santa Monthi

Christmas Day. Jesus Christ’s birthday. But Lakshmi Hadimani insisted she too would celebrate her birthday today. We pointed out that it was pointless -- that her birthday was on another day and it had long gone by and that she should please try to remember.
Monthi Serrao even reminded her that she was born on December 10 and to celebrate after a fortnight, would appear silly. “Let it pass,” Monthi advised her country cousin. “No need to celebrate.”
But Lakshmi was adamant. She believed it was her birthright to celebrate her birthday any day, any time she pleased and to deny her the honour of sharing the day with Jesus Christ was some kind of conspiracy.

Mallika Kagzi's 'tea ceremony'

She became all the more suspicious when she saw Monthi hogging the limelight in a bright red Santa Claus costume and distributing mysterious goodies from a big red bag in the Garden.
So Lakshmi put on a mauve kurta and stationed herself strategically at the gate of the Garden. She declared she too had gone to church and that well, it was not her birthday today, but actually her brother’s. But she would celebrate both birthdays this morning at the Gate – hers with the Vyanjan food packets and her brother’s, with sliced fruitcake. So for us hungry souls (and many other passersby) it was a double treat.
The real Christmas celebration was inside the Garden with Monthi, as usual, handing out crispy home-made savories, jelly sweet and pastry, sealed with loving care in neat polythene packets – something we have come to expect of her every year. For, on this auspicious occasion, she is the one to remind us of essential Christian values, of love, sharing and ‘bringing happiness to others'.
And who could have missed Mallika Kagzi and her quiet celebration in the China Hut? The piping hot tea she poured out of her silver flask was just what the doctor ordered on a cold, windy morning. Merry Christmas everybody!
Bihari Milwani:
On a chilly winter morning, do you assemble for the exercises or are you seeking an excuse for a grand treat?

Festive Cheer

Fehmida Khan

The cold wave continues unabated. The papers are putting it to ‘northerly winds’, ‘low humidity’ and so on, but to us in Mumbai, especially on Christmas eve, the extraordinary chill is the closest we can get to a white Christmas. Fehmida Khan even came dressed in a red Santa Claus outfit, replete with a fur-trimmed hood,

Naseem Khan (r) treats us to barfis from Nagpur

ushering in the yuletide spirit.
It was also Eid-e-Milad un Nabi today – the Prophet’s birthday. Amid the festive cheer with warm hugs and greetings all around, Mallika Kagzi treated us to hot, home-made tea to celebrate the occasion. Shekhawat got his chance and gave a big bear hug to each of his three saalis present this morning. The fourth one had taken the day off.
Naseem Khan also chipped in, adding to the merriment with a box of special malai barfis.

Bijoy Gupta (standing) in full flow

She has just returned from a visit to her home town, Nagpur and it was no small coincidence that she chose an auspicious day to treat us. What more could we have asked for on a freezing December morning when the best part of Mumbai was still fast asleep?
And yet, there was more. Rehearsals for the Annual Day function began in right earnest inside the China Hut (like the last time) and Bijoy Gupta came up with a surprise performance. When prodded to “do something” for the evening, he turned to Shekhawat, his bête noire and threatened to present a “mimicry act”.
What followed was a hilarious, belly-aching adaption of the old Hindi film song, ‘Bade Miyan Deewane, Aise Na Bano'. Gupta cannot sing to save his life, but the way he made up by shouting and gesticulating furiously at a stone-faced Shekhawat had us all in splits. It was by far the stand-out performance of the morning.
Kiran Prakash:
Bijoy Gupta is a hidden gem. His will indeed be a performance, applauded by one and all. We had a glimpse of the performance of Banoo Apa and Fehmida too. I bet the Annual Function will set a benchmark.

Damage Control

Meeting in progress

Today must have been the coldest day of the season. Even those hailing from the north, for whom winter in Mumbai has always been a joke, came wrapped tight in woolens. Shekhawat too came heavily padded up, but could not take the chill beyond a point and rushed home, abandoning the yoga session. Monthi Serrao, as indeed many others, simply did not show up. For all we know, the morning temperature would have dipped well below 10 degrees, something we are not accustomed to.
In all this, Bihari Milwani could get our energy levels soaring with a sumptuous treat of bitter-sweet dark chocolates. It was his birthday today. And in keeping with Big Laaf tradition, we cheered and raised an extra laugh for our ‘Baanke Bihari’, wishing him many happy returns of the day. Tara Chand Seth presented him with a personalised birthday calendar on behalf of the Club.
However, the highlight of the morning was an impromptu meeting convened by Kiran Prakash in order to salvage the Annual Day function scheduled for January 16. It was a last ditch attempt at damage control following a shocker from Razia Khan last evening: “My brother is coming from the USA in the first week of January. So I won’t be able to give sufficient time to the program.

Tara Chand presents birthday calender

Birthday treat from Bihari Milwani

I will have to be with him most of the time. So I request you to please give this responsibility to someone else... I won’t be able to organize the program the way it should be. So I will be very grateful if someone who is more suitable and capable takes this responsibility. I am extremely sorry about this. Next time I will be there, but for now, please excuse me.”
The SMS left Prakash with little option but to take the bull by its horns and himself get everyone motivated for the programme, rather than depend on anyone. And what a fruitful meeting that was! Razia was also present and seeing the enthusiasm of all present, she drew a chair next to Prakash and guided the course of discussions. If only this was done earlier, we would not have lost a lot of valuable time.
Kiran Prakash:
Razia always took a very active part in all the club activities and this time too, wanted to organise the Annual function. However, she is at a crossroad between club commitment and family. I sincerely thank her for taking the lead today. I also thank all members -- especially Banoo Apa, Mumtaz, Mrs Singh, Mallika, Gita, Bhaswati, Qadir, Naseem, Nahid Khan, Swati, Fehmida‎, Rekha, Arun and Bose Babu for their active participation in today's meeting.

Pleasantly Surprised

Tara Chand Seth introduces us to
the magic of shakkar parei

Harbans Kaur receives her birthday
calendar from Lt Col Angad Singh

Dark and chilly morning, broken by the warmth and revelry of two unexpected events: one, Tara Chand Seth celebrated his return to the Garden (on December 18) after giving his grand-daughter in marriage in Delhi; and two, Harbans Kaur received her long-pending birthday calendar from the hands of Lt Col Angad Singh. All of a sudden, it was sunshine again in the Garden.
Harbans Kaur’s gift was however, tinged with sadness. Her birthday was on Sunday, November 29, when many members of the Club were away on the tour of South India. Nevertheless she had a “small celebration” on December 1 (ref post) saying that she intended to throw a bigger bash, when the rest of the Club returns from the tour.

Mohammad Gulzar and his wife (extreme rt) drop by

She would collect her birthday calendar then.
Unfortunately, she had to rush to Delhi as news came in of her sister being terminally ill and in a critical state. “The doctors have given up on her,” she informed upon her return yesterday. In the circumstances, a celebration was considered grossly inappropriate; but upon our request, she agreed to accept her calendar.
As for Tara Chand’s treat, it was yet another occasion when the Club got to savor a somewhat forgotten culinary delight. Not many in Mumbai are familiar with shakkar parei – a crunchy molasses-coated sweet that owes its origins to weddings in the Pakistan side of Punjab. Or so we were told. We thank Tara Chand for introducing us to this magical confection.
Mohammad Gulzar and his wife, Tabassum also gave us a pleasant surprise by turning up after the exercises – though briefly – to collect a cash refund Shekhawat was making. Sadly, they are unable to attend our morning exercises as their little daughter Gulta Fida needs to be dropped to school around the same time. We do miss all three of them.

Headless Chickens

Kiran Prakash appeals to everyone to participate

Time is ticking away and there has been no headway on the Annual Day function scheduled on January 16, 2016 (ref post of December 16). Not one rehearsal has been held so far. Razia Khan, who took the initiative in mobilizing members and had even drawn up a detailed ‘program sheet’ for the evening, has apparently developed cold feet now. She has stopped coming to the Garden.
Clearly left in the lurch, Kiran Prakash today appealed once again to the collective conscience (and individual talent) of all members to “actively participate” in the function and make it a bigger success than the last time.
“I expect you all to take part,” he emphasized. “I want you to tell me by tomorrow morning what you would individually like to do for the function. After tomorrow, we shall not be able to entertain any request from anybody!”
Harbans Kaur repeated her wish to sing two Punjabi folk songs while Fahmida Khan parroted her intention to stage a ‘mimicry show’. Swati Punjabi

Razia Khan

and Monthi Serrao said they were ready to do whatever they were told and Mallika Kagzi, as usual, reiterated she was incapable of doing anything. Mumtaz Jahan said she is an accomplished singer-dancer-actress rolled into one while Bhaswati Bose offered to put together a 15-minute AV presentation on the Club’s recent South India tour.
But all that is not enough. What Kiran Prakash needs is someone with organizational skills, prepared to devote time and inspire by example, conduct rehearsals at odd hours and effectively, get his/ her hands dirty. A supervisory command-and-control mechanism can never work. For ours is a peculiar Club with a distinctive herd mentality. We always like to follow the leader. We need a driver to push-start the car and once it is up and running, everybody else will climb in automatically.
Right now, our best bet for such an inspirational and capable driver is Razia Khan. Sadly, the last time around, she did not get the kind of support and encouragement she had expected from the Club for volunteering her services. Unless she can be persuaded to change her mind (or someone else is identified in her place), we shall be left with a lot of headless chickens and a very slim chance of staging the Annual Day function on schedule.
Kiran Prakash:
Rest assured, the Annual Day function will be held on schedule and we shall do even better than last time. Razia Khan is very much there with her super organisational skills to get the best out of every participant and make the event a grand success.
Anonymous:
Dear Kiran Prakash-ji, your event manager is not working as per your schedule. Please deduct one day's salary from her as a deterrent penalty.
Kiran Prakash replies:
Our event manager is working double-time. She is working even from home. She deserves two day's additional salary as reward. Please keep watching her and you too will admire her commitment and effort.

Day 1846

Pic of the Week

Blue Murder: A little longer and one would've been dead meat!

Mujhe meri Swati se bachao/ Mujhe meri Swati se bachao/ Akadti hai bigadti hai/ Hamesha mujhse ladti hai... --Anonymous

Thank God! You did not kill him Mom!!! --Malvika Punjabi

Swati-ji has beaten my back on the ground. This was part of the Chinese massage. I strongly recommend the same massage to all (male) members from her. Thanks Swati-ji. --Siba Prasad Maitra

Festive Air

Kajal receives her birthday gift and a warm hug from Banoo Apa

The mercury dipped by another notch this morning, but attendance shot up. Being a Saturday, many drop-outs of the week showed up – Prabha Kapoor, Sitaram Hivarkar, Mohan Kanwar Shekhawat, Sheela Mirani, Banoo Apa…
A festive air prevailed in the Garden with Srichand Arora and even the Chinese ta’i chi girls joining us later, after the exercises.
Most importantly, it was Kajal Babani’s birthday -- celebrated belatedly. For the first time we were unable to have the birthday desk calendar ready in time (her birthday was actually the day-before yesterday: see post) and we had requested her to drop by at her convenience for the presentation today.
Banoo Apa did the honors amid a round of applause, much cheering and showering of blessings on the beaming birthday babe.
Shekhawat however,

Yusuf R collects cash from Shekhawat and Monthi Serrao

nursed a grouse. He threatened to confiscate Kajal’s gift (seriously!) and at one point tried to make away with the calendar securely tucked under his shoulder, when he had to be stopped.
He simply could not come to terms with his picture not appearing even on a single page of the calendar. (This is rather unusual because Shekhawat is supposed to be omnipresent in Club photos.)
But how would walking away with Kajal’s calendar help in any way defies logic.
Before long, Shekhawat lost interest in the calendar (naturally!) and stood beside a bench, doling out cash. Yes, cash. To some he gave away five rupees, to some 700 rupees, others 540 rupees… Many received nothing at all. And the one collaborator in this act of selective benevolence was Monthi Serrao.
Arbitrarily they palmed off money to just about anybody who caught their fancy, not even taking a receipt (or signature) in return and refusing those whose face they did not like -- particularly those wearing spectacles.
Nobody had any clue what was going on.
Later, much later, it transpired that they were refunding cash to those who had overpaid for the last South India trip.

Favorite Pastime

Tara Chand Seth is back!

Some people like discussing the weather. Others enjoy talking sex. Many are able to wax eloquent on food. But for us in the Garden, our favorite pastime is chatting on medical matters. We love to discuss our ailments threadbare, badmouth the doctors of all hospitals, yet inform one another of free check-ups, prescribe strange therapies and cures and most irritatingly, tender unsolicited advice.
Today’s provocation was Tara Chand Seth.

Shekhawat is MIB -- Man in Black

He returned last evening, partly to escape the freezing cold in Delhi and also to catch his breath before plunging into another big wedding in the family in February 2016. He said he had been having a hectic time of late and now that he was in the wrong side of the 80s, he gets tired easily.
“I had a by-pass done on my heart 17 years back,” he narrated. “I was then prescribed a fistful of tablets and capsules.

Angad Singh narrates his tale of woe

I took them religiously till about three years back, when I started to feel some unease in my chest. I went for a check-up and the doctor instantly stopped the medicines. My grand-daughter, who is also a doctor, consulted her seniors and they too confirmed that those medicines served no purpose. Since then I am without any medicines and I feel perfectly fine.”
Shekhawat, who also underwent a bypass surgery (three years back), informed that he would have to soon go for a check-up at the Asian Heart Institute in BKC. Over the past week or so, he had endured a battery of tests at the Naval Hospital in Colaba but the findings have scarcely inspired any confidence. [Actually, not many know that late last month, Shekhawat had suffered what seemed to him a ‘silent heart attack’ at Brindavan Gardens in Mysore.] “My son says we need to go for a second opinion,” he said.
Angad Singh narrated a hilarious incident in Mohali one afternoon, when he was abducted by neighborhood women, all because someone saw him exercising a crick in his neck. They got him hospitalized and the doctors there did their best to pin some ailment or disease on him. When they failed after two days, they decided to ‘invent’ a cardiac problem and threatened him with angioplasty. By then his daughter (a doctor) came to his rescue and he could escape unscathed.
Today, looking at this tall, handsome army veteran, who would say he is 82?

Good Cheer

Angad Singh celebrates his grand-daughter's wedding with barfi

All of India may be in the grips of a bone-chilling cold wave, but in Mumbai, the weather is divine – the mornings especially so. Yet, attendance for the exercises is slipping with every passing day. Evidently, people prefer to stay indoors in the most pleasant of times and when the going gets tough, they tumble out en masse in the Garden!
Even so, it was a good day for us. For starters, we ushered Kajal Babani’s birthday by raising an extra laugh and wishing her many happy returns. We understand she is busy with preparations for her daughter’s wedding next week and could not make it to the Garden this morning.

Happy Birthday, Kajal Babani

Moreover, the ‘desk calendar’ the Club gifts to every birthday girl/ boy has got inordinately delayed in her case. So we have requested her to take time out for us on Saturday morning – by which time, the calendar should be ready for her.
Lest anyone felt deprived of a birthday treat, Lt Col Angad Singh graciously stepped in with a box of kaju-katli (barfis) soon after the exercises.

Shekhawat greets the two Chinese ta'i chi girls

Many thought this was his way of registering his return from Mohali (ref yesterday’s post) and as decent human beings, we politely picked a piece each. But Angad insisted we pick a second piece also of the barfi and only then did we learn of the good news: Shiven Preet Kaur, his grand-daughter got married recently and this was a happy grand-father sharing his joy with us. Our blessings go to her and the lucky groom as well.
Meanwhile, Shekhawat had a rare euphoric moment while doing yoga in the China Hut. Two of the Chinese ta’i chi girls wandered into the Garden late morning, obviously not expecting any of us to be around. But Shekhawat had spotted them and without as much of a with-your-leave, he abandoned the yoga session and bounded gleefully towards the girls. It was more of a reunion of long-lost comrades and their happiness in catching up (after no more than a month) was mutual and palpable. After an animated exchange of pleasantries in sign language, Shekhawat managed to convey that they should report to the Garden from tomorrow, without fail.

Work in Progress

Angad Singh (centre) is back after eight months

Brainstorming over Annual Day programme

A youthful looking and rejuvenated Lt Col Angad Singh (retd) returned to the Garden to a rousing welcome this morning. He was away at his hometown, Mohali for the past eight months or so. But he had all along been in touch with us through this blog and used to post his comments from time to time on the day-to-day developments in the Club.
Today, the octogenarian was promptly sucked into the planning and preparations for the Annual Day function, scheduled next month. At the instance of Yusuf Rassiwala, Kiran Prakash and Srichand Arora (who was to join us after the exercises), it was decided to firm up for the evening of January 16, 2016 (a Saturday) when the weather will be “neither too warm nor too cold”. It is being conceived as a two-hour variety entertainment programme (maybe, extended by half-hour max), followed by a packaged dinner.
A minor dispute broke over the venue, since the space in the China Hut was found inadequate to house an audience of nearly 100 last time (April 18, 2015). Razia Khan came up with an alternative – an air-conditioned dance hall in her building complex let out on Rs3,000 for an evening. This would allow us to also dine in the premises, rather than settle for packed food boxes. Yusuf Rassiwala, who is familiar with the place however, shot down the proposal saying that “the hall is too small to accommodate even 40 chairs”. So we are back to the China Hut once again.
Razia had also come prepared with a draft ‘programme sheet’ listing the items to be presented on the evening and their sequence – welcome address, ramp show, audio-visual projection, short play, skits, songs, mimicry, dances… Now, this is the trickiest part of any planning exercise, as no one likes being left out for any reason. How Razia Khan and Kiran Prakash should allow them to give vent to their bottled-up talent, all within two hours, remains to be seen. With exactly a month to go, this is doubtless heavy-duty work in progress.
Lt Col Angad Singh:
Thanks for the rousing reception. I am glad that members of the Club are so youthful and energetic as to remember their old colleagues. I am thrilled to be back with them. I was also surprised that some new, rejuvenating Chinese exercises have been added which are essential and helpful to feel full of energy in the end.

Weather Change

Photos of south India tour change hands

It is mid-December and only now is winter creeping in. The mornings are dark, but cool and pleasant. Woolens have started to appear on the likes of Razia Khan, Monthi Serrao and Siba Prasad Maitra. And even regulars are turning up late these days or reporting sick due to the ‘change of weather’.
Khatoon Baig showed up after four days, looking anxious and scared. Her asthma problem has aggravated – much like when she had to be hospitalized in Hyderabad earlier in the month. But rather than agonize in self-pity, she kept assuring her friends that she will “manage somehow” and that nobody should worry unduly for her.
Many seniors like Srichand Arora, Sitaram Hivarkar and Jagmohan Papneja have turned erratic in their daily attendance.

Chauudhurys, father and son

Bijoy Gupta today could not take the exercises beyond a point and plonked himself on an empty chair, complaining of “weakness”.
Shekhawat is going every morning for tests at the Navy Hospital in Colaba. Mumtaz Jahan and Fehmida Khan are said to be still under the weather.
And then, there is the growing mystery surrounding several long-term absentees. For one, Nirmala Yadav (ref post of November 28) has disappeared without a trace, significantly, after collecting her Club cap.

Khatoon Baig

For another, there is no news of the Choudharys, who used to be so popular and had endeared themselves to everyone in a short time. It is over two weeks since the family stopped coming to the Garden and Ajit Choudhary isn’t taking any call either. And what can be said of those lively ta'i chi Chinese girls, last seen on November 23? Like the rest, they too have vanished into thin air!
The good news though, is that Kiran Prakash could make it to the Garden this morning (ref yesterday’s post). He had to drive down from Malad, but if he had any plans for the Annual Day programme, it is unlikely he could make much headway. Nahid Siddiqui had brought a bunch of photos on the South India tour (November 24 to December 3) and everybody got so taken in by them that everything else receded into insignificance. The tour hangover would apparently last for some more time.
Ajit Choudhary:
I am sorry I could not accept any call. My mom is now okay but Papa has developed some urinary problem. Due to this, I am busy with office, the pathology lab and hospital. Really sorry. Once this settles, we will be back with Big Laaf. We are really missing you all.
Anonymous:
Early morning my wife clings to me and cries, "Mujhko thand lag rahi hai mujhse door tu na ja, na-ja, na-ja na-ja na-ja..." Then tell me how shall I come.

Shifting Out

Kiran Prakash

This was one association too good to last. It would seem just the other day that Kiran Prakash joined us, literally out of nowhere. He simply walked into the exercise circle, introduced himself and before long, became an integral part of the Big Laaf family – forever helpful and supportive, taking the lead at conducting the exercises, setting an example by being unfailingly regular and punctual and most remarkably, initiating the Annual Day function. We too embraced him unconditionally, with open arms. And just as abruptly it all started, it is ending now.
Kiran Prakash has relocated to Malad.
“I am not leaving you people any time soon,” he phoned up to say this morning.

Razia Khan conducts 'Chinese exercises' in place of Prakash

“I need to be in the Club, both for my physical and mental well-being. The morning regimen has become a lifeline for me over the past year or so. I will figure out some way to be in the Garden early morning – maybe not as regular as earlier, but as often as I can.”
Malad is a good 15-minute drive to the Garden and according to most members,

Nahid Khan gets us Shirdi prasad

it is unlikely Kiran Prakash would be able to keep up to his morning routine however much he would like to. “How is he going to make it?” said Santosh Tyagi despondently. “They all talk like this before leaving. Purushottam Sharma had said the same thing before shifting to Goregaon. But once he left, he forgot all about us. It is not physically practical to maintain old ties long-distance.”
Harbans Kaur agreed: “But Kiran Prakash-ji was a good person.”
Razia Khan is feeling particularly ‘orphaned’, for obvious reasons. On Kiran Prakash’s say-so, she agreed to coordinate the entertainment line-up for the Annual Day function (ref post of December 13) and today, even got Fehmida Khan to commit a ‘mimicry act’. Nahid Khan said she already had a short play in hand and would get started with the casting and rehearsals.
Some members insisted their grandchildren be allowed to take part while Santosh Tyagi came up with some innovative ideas for the ‘ramp show’. She said she would cut short her trip to Delhi this week so as to be able to devote more time for the programme. Alas, Kiran Prakash will not be part of all this action.

Kiran Prakash:
I read my obituary with interest. No body knows what is in store in future. Big Laaf is very close to my heart. I have love and respect for everybody -- Arun Patil to Zareena Khan. This is one team which takes care of one another, values one-another's opinion and forgets fights in no time. Where else will I find such people? I hope I am able to prove you wrong and continue to be a part of the Club's New Year programme.
Bhaswati Bose:
Please don't leave us, Mr Kiran Prakash. The (double) light of our lives will go away from the Garden!
Kiran Prakash replies:
You are embarrassing me, Bhaswati-ji. Big Laaf is a self-sustaining club. Where else will you find somebody flanked by his four saalis in a public place? It happens only in Big Laaf. Where else would 60+ brothers and sisters fight like teenagers? There is much more to Big Laaf than anybody can think of. God bless us.